Lazy W Marie

Carpeing all the diems in semi-rural Oklahoma...xoxo

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turkey palooza love letter to my family

December 3, 2019

In our family, every person counts. We are a big, rambunctious crowd, and while from the outside it may seem that anyone could get lost in us, we always feel the absence of any one member.

In our family, we tease each other mercilessly, sometimes bordering on meanness, but we love each other fiercely and will defend each other to outsiders with everything we have. Sincere efforts are appreciated, too, and applauded. We love doing things for and with each other.

In our family, we value fun and silliness. Greatly. We laugh loudly and a lot. And at everything. Over and over and over again. We play games chance we get.

In our family, kids are precious. And the adults are also kids.

In our family we weep with each other. And although we no longer attend church together, we all feel and benefit from each other’s prayers.

We all crave deeper and continuing connection with each other. We are gently competitive, but we mostly help each other. Everyone contributes. Even the Whos in Whoville have nothing on our family’s sense of teamwork. You know what we should do? Go on Family Feud or maybe The Greatest Race or something.

For us, there is no such thing as a black sheep, because we all take turns being the odd man out, ha. At some time, each of us has wandered from the fold, and we always come back. This gives us hope for our babes who are hurting. We have learned that each of us has an ongoing need for grace and mercy. We all have said and done things to hurt each other, we all have been forgiven, we all want everybody else to stay close immediately and from now on, ok? There are no outsiders in our family. We are all of us, together, even when we are far flung. Every person is worth waiting for.  

(Come home, Joc. We miss you. We need you. We are here for anything you need.)

We love each other. We love each other’s babies and puppies. We feel at home in each other’s homes. It feels like childhood after a few hours or especially a few days together in a shared, confined space.

In our family, we eat really well. We are, I like to think, health conscious hedonists. Giving us home cooked food with whole milk and eating dinner at the table for 90% of our meals, Mom and Dad raised lots of very enthusiastic cooks! This Thanksgiving, two of their adult grandchildren some cooking for the feast, and we were so proud.

We care about beauty and lushness, but we are not too fancy.

?

We value lots of traditions, if they serve our communal joy, and we won’t be shamed out of it. We don’t mind test driving new traditions either! The Saran Wrap game is only a few years old for us, but it’s not going anywhere. We also love to share memories and figure out which details we retain differently. (If you think we didn’t have a pet ferret, though, you’re wrong.)

?

In our family we work hard and expect accountability. For example, when a projects falls flat, Dad might say, “What did you think would happen when you did that?” And this question doesn’t sting; it only points us back to the process.

We nap hard. We dance, draw,  create, play music, imagine, climb trees, study, clean, and work. Hard. Really hard. All of it.

Our family takes lots and lots of photos! Of everything. We do this because we are amazed by how quickly time passes. We want some documentation of all this life happening. But we also hate for our own photos to be posted to Face book without permission. Ask Genny about having cheeks full of banana at the 5K.

For our family, the two people who started everything as bright eyed, glossy faced teenagers are now our matriarch and patriarch, and for all of our juvenile complaining and petulance in the past, now… none of us know what we would do without them.

In our family we celebrate each other’s successes. We ask a lot about the future, and we love talking to each other about our plans, whatever they may be, big or small. We encourage each other. We have learned to not dwell too long in the past, except to celebrate it and hopefully laugh. We have learned that every single one of us needs some forward momentum. Some encouragement and a push here and there. Also some grace and compassion, all of which we happily provide for each other.

In our family, it’s a lot. It’s a lot of a lot, with no signs of it ever not being a lot. But we love it. Our two sweet members who married into all of this A-Lot-Ness  probably feel it the most. BW and Halee are often a bit wide-eyed by the end of a good reunion, but we trust that they too value the whirling dervish that is our family.

We all need a nap now. And a bit of quiet, maybe some Febreeze for the house and a few raw veggies for our bellies. But truly we just love the happy chaos so much. We love the intense texture and noise and wild flavor of us all together, because as messy as it is, as overwhelming as it can be, as much as the togetherness may stretch each other’s boundaries, this is where each of us originated.  This is the very real and powerful nucleus of Love and Intention and Effort from which all five of us sprouted and grew. How wonderful that we all have grown in such different directions and still “come home” to celebrate so often.

Come home. Touch base. Home base.

“Safe!”
(unless you are playing Wago)
XOXOXOXO

7 Comments
Filed Under: 1000gifts, familyTagged: connection, family, gratitude, love, Thanksgiving, traditions

happy 44th to Handsome!!!

August 30, 2019

On Wednesday, the weather was cool and mild, nothing like we normally have in August in Oklahoma. Jess was at the farm recovering from the surgical eviction of her ill-fitting wisdom teeth, and Handsome was home from the Commish, cheerfully juggling all sorts of farm projects and repairs. But you know what else Wednesday was? August 28th. My sweet, strong, amazing husband’s birthday.

On that date in 1975, his Mom, natural red hair flowing almost down to her waist, gave birth to the boy that she and Harvey craved beyond cravings. They started a new chapter in the story of their blended family, quite against the odds then, and I will forever be grateful for their choices.

Because of their son, everything is better. He works hard and loves hard and kindles passionate fires with anyone who crosses his path. He cultivates progress and efficiency. He chooses joy and celebrates the big and the small victories in life. He is also the most supportive, most protective, most affectionate husband and father you can imagine. After all these years together, he often shocks me with his depth of love and compassion and ability to reflect.

Plus life with him is just plain fun.

salt life & romance xoxo

If you know Handsome in real life, then you know he loves beaches and summertime, motionless pool days and crazy parties. You know that Halloween is his favorite holiday, but with a little encouragement he will throw himself into every other (lesser) holiday. He favors movies that make him laugh, and he saves long road trips for country music that helps him cry. He loves steak dinners and 911 hot wings and one very specific flavor of ice cream from Baskin Robbins. (Don’t bother trying to convince him of reasonable substitutes. On this point, he is quite stubborn.)

He will eat spinach salads and roasted broccoli, sometimes zucchini and Eggplant Parmesan, but don’t press him into a salad bar, okay, unless you can time travel back to before Steak and Ale went out of business. Despite his apathy for most vegetables, though, he will go to great lengths to build structures for my vegetable gardens. And he will do anything I ask or hint at to protect all our growing efforts here.

If you don’t know yet, I will tell you that his heart has been broken repeatedly. It’s because he does love so deeply. And losing people or severing relationships has injured him in awful ways. Still, he resists bitterness. He fights it actively and pours his love into new people over and over again.

Spend a little time with this man and you will sense his fascination with other cultures and belief systems. This is one of the qualities that first captured my heart years and years ago, and he continues to woo me with his open mind and natural hospitality.

Every job he does, professional, domestic, and otherwise, becomes a proving ground. Every project he tackles ends with more than outward success; he transforms the process and re-charts the path forward. It can be frustrating. Maddening. Infuriating. And always inspiring.

True to his childhood form, he treasures toys and collections, never leaving things in their boxes. He displays them. Plays with them. He watches cartoons while staying up to date on current events (he is often part of the current events). He loves dressing up in costume, and lately he has especially loved doing this for kids. His heart for children who are hurting would make his Mom and his Grandma so proud.

an old photo but one of my favorites

On our cool, quiet Wednesday, once Jess and I were home from the dentist, we ate homemade chicken and dumplings first (thin chicken soup for the oral surgery patient) then a buttery slab of shortbread apple tart (ice cream for Jess). We watched movies and had pedicures in the living room, the three of us plus Klaus, and silently missed Jocelyn but immersed ourselves in the many joys of the moment.

On Thursday, the weather grew steamy again and we ventured outside here and there. Jess was recovering beautifully, falling asleep in weird places at the drop of a hat, often mid-sentence haha! The birthday boy worked too hard but seemed happy with his progress on our deck. Eventually Alex joined us for a surprise, casual dinner, and we all simmered in love. Jess left the farm happy and healthy. Klaus pouted. I gave my husband a hard-earned massage.

There is so much more to say for his birthday, so much unending love to give and appreciation that needs to be expressed. Brandy is the backbone of our home, of his office, in many ways of our community. Nothing would be as good and safe and beautiful without him. He is my past, my present, and my future, and today more than ever I am acutely grateful for Harvey and Judy choosing to have their baby together. I am floored by how much love and teaching has built their boy into this man.

Happiest of birthdays, babe!! It is raining a monsoon as I type this, and I don’t know exactly how the rest of your week off will look, but as always we will make the very most of what gifts we are offered. Cheers to the next year of life!

XOXOXOXOXO

1 Comment
Filed Under: UncategorizedTagged: birthdays, carpe diem, family

read, watch, listen this week & some happy photos

February 15, 2019

This week has brought me lots of excellent stuff to read, watch, and listen to. Here it all is, plus a handful of random snapshots from my phone!

I’ll Have Another podcast (with Lindsey Hein) Her live interview with Scott Jurek, author of North, was crazy relatable and a solid inspiration. I struggle sometimes with keeping my eyes on my own dreams and goals, with not being distracted by others’ accomplishments, especially during race season. His words of wisdom encouraged me to play around with variety in my running and also to, quite literally, forge a solitary path. North, after all, was all about his journey along the Appalachian Trail, basically backwards. Cannot wait to read it. Give this podcast episode #164 a listen if you have time!

The Power of Now, by Eckhart Tolle. I am making my way slowly through this book and love it to the max. Here’s a quote to tempt you:

Accept, then act. Whatever the present moment contains, accept it as if you had chosen it. Always work with it, not against it. Make it your friend and ally, not your enemy. This will miraculously transform your whole life.

Ride with Norman Reedus. Have you caught this new series yet? It’s on AMC, just like The Walking Dead. We are hooked. It’s mellow, adventurous, conversational, and filled with great personalities. And to watch a bunch of motorcycle scenes on the brink of springtime just gets us so excited for little road trips.

Sandy the Reluctant Entertainer posted yet another mouthwatering recipe, this time for a very special cookie, and the message she wove into the post is just as wonderful. Check out Simple Almond Cranberry Crunch.

Heal. Our friend Kelley, the same magical woman who together with her husband Chuck taught us that paint pouring technique, recommended this Netflix special. I have watched it once alone and once with Handsome, and it bears lots of discussion. The bulk of the message is mind-over-matter encouragement for chronic illness, but it’s illustrated by as much science as anecdote. If you watch it, I would really like to hear your thoughts. Keywords: Tonic versus toxic thoughts and words, Quantum Entanglement, and our Inner Pharmacy. Thanks Kelley!!

Okay, a handful of photos and only very brief stories for each:

One day this week we had warm, mild weather! I ran in a tank top, no hat and gloves!! And I wore two watches, ha. Handsome had left his at home (my old black one) so to be funny I wore it for an easy 6 miles. His watch gave a close pace to mine but said I burned lots and lots more calories, ha!

We have a new outdoor flight pen for Pacino!! He has needed this for a while, and we are pretty excited. As the weather improves he will spend more hours out here, and we will keep him company. We might even find some feathery companions for the blue boy. Since this photo was taken, we have added artwork and more obstacles for enrichment. He really seems to like it all.

For Valentine’s Day this year, we geared up for a fancy dinner at home then changed into pajamas and ate our meal blissfully in the cozy living room. I surprised my guy with an espresso machine for his office, and he gave me a weed eater for my gardens and beehives, haha!! Also, a long love letter form the world’s most romantic man and a perfectly cooked heart-shaped ribeye, a well established tradition. I love this exact recipe for being fluent in each other’s love languages.

Klaus loves playing fetch even more than I love perfect coffee. He also loves to collect his objects of fetch in little piles all over the farm. When I stumble on a new cache, sometimes he acts nervous. This one is in the far southwest corner of the back field, where we visit at least three times per day on patrol walks. Apparently he has been accumulating things secretly.

My brother’s firstborn, Greg, and my baby, Jess. These cousins are spending some quality time together this weekend, and my heart is swelling with joy.

I saved the photo for last that will go down in our family’s history as the biggest headline for this week. Dante, my sister Angela’s firstborn, finished Air Force Basic Training and actually graduated with honors. He is so deeply loved, and everyone is so proud and excited for his accomplishments and his coming opportunities, words fail me. We did not make it to San Antonio for the festivities, so I have been poring over the photo stream every hour, often crying with joy. So many hugs, so much intimacy and strength. Just amazing.

Okay sweet friends, thanks for checking in!! Life is good. Weather here is all over the place, but our hibernation days are numbered. I see streaks of emerald green in the middle field, but mostly from a distance. Up close, it’s still quite brown.

And God has been answering prayers big and small like it’s going out of style. Although obviously that will never happen. I cannot stress enough, TRUST HIM. He’s got this.

Ok it’s almost time for a movie and a bowl of popcorn, then rest day tomorrow! See you soon! Have the best weekend ever!!

“In the Spring I have counted
136 different kinds of weather
inside of 24 hours.”
~Mark Twain
XOXOXOXO

3 Comments
Filed Under: UncategorizedTagged: animals, books, daily life, family, farm life, gratitude, podcasts, reading

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Hi! I'm Marie. Welcome to the Lazy W. xoxo

Hi! I’m Marie. This is the Lazy W.

A hobby farming, book reading, coffee drinking, romance having, miles running girl in Oklahoma. Soaking up the particular beauty of every day. Blogging on the side. Welcome to the Lazy W!

I Believe Strongly in the Power of Gratitude & Joy Seeking

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"Edit your life freely and ruthlessly. It's your masterpiece after all." ~Nathan W. Morris

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