Lazy W Marie

Carpeing all the diems in semi-rural Oklahoma...xoxo

  • Welcome!
  • Home
  • lazy w farm journal

forty seven years and many more to go

October 25, 2020

On this cold and variable autumn weekend in late October, my beautiful parents are celebrating their 47th wedding anniversary. Rumor has it they stole away to their own backyard for a brief and covid-friendly date night, which is to say that they are finally getting a room. Get a room guys! hehe

Mom, baby me, and Dad, circa 1974.

My parents married especially young and had me almost immediately, then they had four more kids who were also, well, pretty good, depending on who you ask.

Genevieve, me, Angela, Philip, & Joey (not in birth order or coolness order either)

All my life our parents have been the young parents in every crowd, and I have loved it. I grew up very accustomed to my female friends having crushes on Dad and my male friends having crushes on Mom (a particular devastation, though, when I reached the age to have crushes on those boys). Moreover, I always just felt like part of them. No kids remember life without their parents; but I felt a unique sense of almost kinship or camaraderie because we were relatively close in age. Understandably, they were less advertisory about this fact to the world at large. I suppose, especially in the 1970s, people might be judgmental and have plenty to say about it. But I was always proud of them, and I still am.

Earlier this month I had the opportunity to answer a question about their youth, when I posted about Dad’s 63rd birthday. A new Facebook friend noticed the narrow age difference between Dad and me (I am 46), and I quickly confirmed it. I am never shy about this. I said that yes, they were very young when they married, and the five of us kids have been the luckiest kids ever for their love and devotion, not just to us but to each other.

Growing up with young parents was gobs of fun. They were energetic, playful, driven, attentive, hard working, and always up for every good tradition, big and small. They fed us healthy food every single meal, read aloud to us and in front of us, took us on all kinds of trips, threw countless parties, fixed our cars, made us laugh, connected us to family and friends at every turn, kept us in Catholic school whether we deserved it or not, and endured all of our adolescent weirdness and young-adult griefs. They gave us everything, most of it made from thin air, and I honestly do not know how they did it. What I do know, in my bones, is that our charmed and beautiful family life was a product of sheer will, determination and, yes, passion (get a room).

The older I get, the more I realize how lucky we are to still have our parents alive and healthy, still married, and still celebrating their anniversary in personal, unique ways. They still tease us and feed us. They still laugh hard with us and read books and ask us what we are reading. They still try to get us all together as often a possible, whether it’s a weekend cookout or a special group travel plan or, during pandemic, a family Zoom. It sometimes makes me cry thinking of how much of their human lives have been spent, literally, on us.

group candids = the best

We have received the full force of their loving personalities for forty seven years, and now a whole batch of grandchildren are soaking it up, too. Maybe soon, great grandchildren.

Seeing Mom and Dad celebrate privately now, and seeing them enjoy their home in this brand new chapter of middle aged romance, is lusciously sweet.

The photo above is from when Mom and Dad renewed their vows in the Church. (Their first wedding was several years prior, and before Mom took her Catechism and joined.) See Mom’s wedding band on her necklace? My memory is that she and Dad both wore their bands this way for several months leading up to the ceremony. It was a very intentional second engagement, something they didn’t experience the first time around. I think about this all the time.

Mom and Dad, you never pretended like marriage has been easy, but man, you have made it look so completely worth all that was asked of you, and that is inspiring. Wildly encouraging. We might never really understand how hard it has been for you, or what you have sacrificed to be our parents. But we hope to have many decades still to say thank you and to encourage you to live life for yourselves as much as possible. Your efforts have not been in vain. I hope you feel as much joy and satisfaction, as we all feel gratitude. I hope your backyard pandemic-style anniversary celebration was romantic and happy!!

“You come from a long line of effort.”
~Mickey Sperry
XOXOXOXO

1 Comment
Filed Under: UncategorizedTagged: anniversary, family, gratitude, love, marriage, memories, parents

the ghosts of birthdays past & a long wish for my guy xoxo

September 1, 2020

Last week my cute husband turned 45!!

We have been celebrating together for so many years, but of course, pandemic presented some challenges to the norm. More than ever, I have hoped that a few private “Birthday Week” traditions would sustain him and make him feel as deeply loved as he surely is. (Wrapped gifts, favorite foods and guiltless couch time, I’m lookin at you.)

A few magical extras, though, need to be mentioned!

Last week, in the midst of a regular work and farm schedule, we spaced out a few tiny gatherings of dear friends to begin painting the exterioir walls of our new yurt. This definitely helped it feel celebratory around here! I’ll share those photos and stories separately, and soon.

Then… Then!! The Thursday afternoon surprise:

Something extra special for this birthday was how Handsome’s office family went above and beyond to surprise him. For weeks, Geoff and his colleagues recruited about 60 people from the Commish and beyond to each record a short video birthday greeting, which were then artfully compiled for the group online monthly meeting. It was all so funny, so appreciative, and really tear jerking. David from PUD played a gorgeous piano recital during their video conference Team Builder. And they also constructed a “Trivial Pursuit” style group activity all centered around their fearless leader and his life. It was all so good and will absolutely go down in birthday history!

That night we welcome one couple to the farm (thanks for coming, Brad and Chelsea!) and ate a tender, flavorful smoked brisket gifted to Handsome by Dennis and the Enforcement team, plus the most decadent chocolate layer cake I have ever eaten, baked by Tessa, an analyst in PUD.

On his own birthday, my husband bought a bicycle, tire pump, and lock for a young man in OKC transitioning from homelessness to his first apartment. It was a collaboration with my sister, who is a breathtaking human. My guy would probably rather me not talk about this, but it was a vivid memory I have no wish to forget. “It was a good day,” Angela later texted. She was right.

Then from Friday evening through Sunday evening, we stayed up late and slept late and did exactly the amount of work we felt like doing (not much, ha). We spent the weekend swimming and watching movies and reality shows and funny YouTube videos. I can think of precious few hours last weekend that were not made sweeter by some thin, secret slice of chocolate cake stuffed criminially into either of our mouths, ha! Add in some romantic hot tub time and maximum pajama lounging, and I hope he felt as unwound as I did. He certainly deserves it, and much more.

We expect two more small group gatherings this weekend, and Jessica will be visiting next week, for an old fashioned slumber party complete with video games, movies, and good food. We love all of it! Hopefully no viruses will be exchanged.

We do miss parties. We definitely miss having our friends’ voices and energies combine en masse into that special something at the farm. We miss scavenger hunts in Bricktown and car shows and talent shows, and restaurant gatherings so large we have to reserve an entire room. I would very much like to give my husband something big and wild and memorable like those birthdays past, because he gives so much to everyone else all the time.

2015 surprise rockabilly car show at the farm for his 40th birthday!
Birthday scavenger hunt in Bricktown!

Until those days return, a Birthday Week wish for my guy:

May you always remember that you were born on purpose, and that you life is bursting with purpose.

May you always feel connected to your strong, beautiful roots.

May you never be too far from a good steak or a nice bit of chocolate dessert. And may your internet always be fast and your blankets always fuzzy and clean.

May your beach trips soon become more frequent and your travel appetite soon quenched.

May your dreams for the Batmobile come to fruition, and may some of the generosity you show be returned to
you at moments when you need it most.

May your pool water never grow algea, and may wasps suddenly become extinct, at least on these nine acres. May all the shingles in your life stay in place, and may wire fences suddenly become indestructible.

May you feel that click, that sense of belonging and comfort, as a brother and as a friend, as a father and as a neighbor. You know you are needed, but may you also know deep in your bones how loved and wanted you are, by so many people.

May the funny movies at your disposal far outnumber the amount of political ads and heat-and-air commercials you have to see.

May you feel deeply and permanently loved, for just being you, for every minute of the rest of your life.

I am so happy and forever grateful that you were born on that summer day in 1975.

Cheers to many, many more.
XOXOXOXO

1 Comment
Filed Under: UncategorizedTagged: birthdays, handsome, memories, quarantine coping

so many people to love

July 25, 2020

After a really fun family dinner and silly videos last night with the kids, Jess and Alex took Bean home for the weekend. (They’ll be back soon for more farm retreat livin.) So early this morning Klaus showed me the Apartment door, knocked on it with one giant paw, and smiled at me over his shoulder. I had to open the door and show him around, proving to this sweet big boy that they weren’t there, ha!

Kenzie, our youngest niece, turned 13 today, wahoo!! A milestone birthday, in the midst of a pandemic, and fresh on the heels of a brand new round of testing and quarantine for her household.

These facts are almost universal now, and commonplace, and less startling in many ways than they would have been two or three months ago.

Or so I thought.

My magical first sister arranged a drive-past-curbside birthday celebration for her baby, and when I saw these young ladies on the sidewalk my throat tightened up and my eyes flooded, involuntarily. I had been happy and excited to get there, but seeing them, in masks, and us wearing masks ourselves, and none of us hugging, although I definitely believe these are the right things to do, just gave me lots of feelings. A moment in history. I hated driving away from them.

The very first day we all get clean bills of covid health, I want to see them.

Tomorrow is a big day for some of our favorite humans, our dearest and closest friends who are really our brother and sister now. Say some prayers with us, for continued grace and peace? Thank you!

We have some fun plans for when Jess returns soon, and the gardens are already approaching the cusp of a transition, and I have laid hold on a temporary fitness plan that feels really good for this weird season. Those are a few previews.

Happy Saturday night, friends!

“Small streams don’t choose to be mighty rivers.
We keep moving in a direction
And God decides what He’ll make out of us.”
~Bob Goff
XOXOXO

3 Comments
Filed Under: UncategorizedTagged: choose joy, covid, family, kenzie, love, memories, quarantine coping

friday fun

July 24, 2020

The frozen treats were a fun success! Below you can see the South Flock carefully investigating their bundt shaped, icy vitamins and minerals. Jess and I revisited the scene an hour or so later, and the smooth top was choppy and melting, the herbs and veggies exposed. The most intrested party seems to have been that good looking rooster there on the right.

A few special memories from today, so we can enjoy them later:

ONE: Bean has a penchant for jumping in to “rescue” his momma when she disappears underwater. And he is getting really good at jumping really far from the ladder!

TWO: Klaus and Bean are excellent teammates when it comes to warding off Amazon drivers, etc. But they are a little competitive when it comes to plush animal toys. And fetching softballs.

THREE: Garden veggies make the best Italian marinara ingredients, and Jessica has the touch! She chopped, sauteed, simmered, seasoned, tasted, seasoned again, and stirred her heart out until, two hours later, we had the most delicious sauce for pasta and meatballs.

FOUR: She also has the touch for soft cinnamon rolls! Wow. If we all sleep well tonight, we should be so filled with energy tomorrow, ha!

FIVE: Today we proved again that open, fearless conversation about hard things is fruitful, refreshing, and healing.

Sweet sleep, friends! I watched a TED talk this morning about mindfulness and neuroplasticity, and I have a book to discuss with you, but it will all have to wait. Our bellies are full of pasta and soft cinnamon roll goodness, and our comfy bed beckons.

CHOOSE JOY.
Stay on the path of peace.
XOXOXOXO

1 Comment
Filed Under: UncategorizedTagged: carpe diem, choose joy, friday 5, jess, love, memories, staycation

impermanence

July 23, 2020

Yesterday afternoon, Handsome walked into the Apartment where Jess and I had parked to do some serious conversating. He announced playfully that between the dogs roughhousing and panting like monsters and the women talking nonstop, the temperature inside the house had risen five degrees. Ha! It might actually have been true. Once again, #sorrynotsorry

On Day 2 of Jess’ Farm Retreat, we swam, made frozen treats for the chickens, chased the dogs tirelessly, made Bean swim in a tiny inflatable pool donut, fed extra soft grass to the horses, discussed legiterally everything, made sprinkle sugar cookies via Joy the Baker, made homemade pizza from scratch, and watched a movie at the end of it all. Somewhere in there Jess managed a good old fashioned summertime afternoon nap, much needed and hard earned.

We had planned an art project like painting or scarecrow constructing, perhaps macrame, but got pleasantly sidetracked making the chickens’ frozen scraps treats. This is when the topic of impermanence arose. It was such a careful, loving task, walking around the farm collecting colorful flowers, herbs, and bits of fruits and vegies, then cleaning out the kitchen for more. We chopped everything and Jessica arranged it beautifully inside a bundt cake pan before filling the pan with water to freeze. All of this preparation for a treat that will freeze overnight and be toyed with, melted, and consumed tomorrow morning. A brief pleasure, an impermanent gift. But still joyful. We talked about the monks who work so hard on their intricate chalk mandalas, only to sweep them away once finished.

Have you seen Onward yet? Oh gosh. The three of us (five of us if you count the dogs which you definitely should) watched it tonight with our homemade pizzas and sprinkle cookies. It is not just cute and funny, it is also one of the most inclusive, soothing, loving Pixar films so far, with many beautiful messages. We all really loved it, and I actually felt a warm touch of grace for having seen it exactly on this night, exactly in this life chapter, exactly after a series of heavy conversations Jess and I have had this week.

I am not certain what tomorrow holds for us, both in the broader life sense as well as in the what will be doing on Friday sense, ha! But I know what our prayers are. I know what our values are. I know what binds us together and what fuels our work and our play. I know that Love is worth every bit of our trust and that magic is real.

Sweet sleep, friends! Thanks for checking in!

XOXOXOXO

1 Comment
Filed Under: UncategorizedTagged: bloggingstreak, choose joy, farmlife, grief, impermanence, Jessica, love, memories, summertime

  • 1
  • 2
  • Next Page »
Hi! I'm Marie. Welcome to the Lazy W. xoxo

Hi! I’m Marie. This is the Lazy W.

A hobby farming, book reading, coffee drinking, romance having, miles running girl in Oklahoma. Soaking up the particular beauty of every day. Blogging on the side. Welcome to the Lazy W!

I Believe Strongly in the Power of Gratitude & Joy Seeking

Follow Marie Wreath's board Gratitude & Joy Seeking on Pinterest.

Pages

  • bookish
  • Farm & Animal Stories
  • lazy w farm journal
  • Welcome!

Lazy W Happenings Lately

  • duck tales, a-woo-hoo February 17, 2021
  • romance right now February 14, 2021
  • araceli’s enchiladas verdes February 12, 2021
  • new aquarius moon, senses inventory February 11, 2021
  • “I knew it would happen today!” February 7, 2021
"Edit your life freely and ruthlessly. It's your masterpiece after all." ~Nathan W. Morris

Archives

February 2021
M T W T F S S
« Jan    
1234567
891011121314
15161718192021
22232425262728

Looking for Something?

Theme Design By Studio Mommy · Copyright © 2021

Copyright © 2021 · Beyond Madison Theme on Genesis Framework · WordPress · Log in