Lazy W Marie

Carpeing all the diems in semi-rural Oklahoma...xoxo

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near miss & a new friend

May 11, 2022

Yesterday midmorning I was driving north on Harrah road, toward the park for a run. I was in the right hand lane, slowing gradually nearer the school zone, far away from all other cars. Just as I passed the gas station on the west side of the road, a gray pickup with a camper shell exploded out of the intersection and raced right up alongside my car, definitely aimed for it. I hit my brakes and fishtailed just a little bit, and very much against my nature I also laid the palm of my hand on the horn, simultaneously. It was all instinct, not anger, though within seconds of narrowly avoiding a crash all that adrenaline did turn to anger. The pickup swerved just a breath away from hitting me, and the driver blended slowly into the right hand lane, just in front of me.

My hands were ten and two and shaking. I took several deep breaths and continued driving, even more slowly now, and eased a greater than necessary distance from the gray truck in front of me. I was nearing the park to stop for a run and saw that he, too, was headed there. He used his blinker, drove slowly, yielding to pedestrians the entire time, and parked in the shade.

I briefly considered driving somewhere else to run, I am so averse to confrontation. But I talked myself into staying because I had done nothing wrong. I just felt weird and conspicuous for having honked. I also didn’t know if the other driver felt he had done anything to warrant being honked at, and maybe he would think I almost hit him, you know, and try to fist fight me and I don’t know how to fight, not even in a video game.

My inner life in complicated.

Anyway I stayed.

I also pulled into the parking lot slowly, also yielded to pedestrians, and parked as far from his truck as I could. I did my weird little warm up, started my podcast about an unsolved murder, and started jogging. I was plenty nervous, and I don’t know exactly why. I just hate conflict so much.

The park has a smallish oval loop sidewalk for walking and jogging. I was going counterclockwise and the other driver was walking clockwise. We passed each other head on a few times before we both looked up and acknowledged each other. I pressed a thin smile at him and raised a hand for a low commitment wave, and he nodded softly and also smiled, but he looked sad. He was elderly but not frail, clean cut, polite, focused, and walking alone.

Around mile six I paused at my car for a drink of water, and I saw his truck pull up behind me, perpendicular to my bumper. I paused my stupid murder story and waited as he reluctantly put his truck in park and stepped out into the now blazing sun.

I took a deep breath and assured myself everything was fine. His posture was steady and gentlemanly. Polite. Cautious. He removed his ball cap and opened both hands and said, “I nearly hit you there, I pulled out and scared you, and I am so sorry.” His voice broke my stupid heart. Any defensiveness still in my body dissolved into either shame for honking at him or compassion or maybe amazement at his quiet nobility.

“No I am sorry, I never honk, I am so sorry I honked at you!” My chin started trembling. I was sweaty from running but also cold.

He shook his head and cut me off (haha) saying, “No, I didn’t mean to, but I did almost hit you.” He spoke more firmly this time. He went on to explain that the woman driving behind him had been speeding in that school zone, and she scared him. He felt she was about to slam into him from behind when he saw the opportunity or necessity to race out of the intersection, but all of it was so jarring, so sudden.

I tried a second time to apologize, and I extended both of my hands, not metaphorically. We shook hands normally at first then held hands, and I started weeping a tiny bit behind my scratched up cheap sunglasses. Had I not been sweaty I might have forced a totally inappropriate and unnecessary hug on this stranger (bad hugs are my hobby). It turns out, the verbal exchange was infinitely sweeter.

He said several more times and in a few different ways that he was sorry, and I said I was sorry. I thanked him for coming over to talk to me, told him I had been worried about it (the murder story barely kept my mind occupied), and told him his generosity made me feel so much better. I told him I was so glad that woman didn’t hit him. We agreed we all got lucky and wished each other a good rest of the day then shook hands again (I resisted the urge to invite him for Thanksgiving, because are we friends now?).

As he left the parking lot I started my murder story again, continued my run, and exploded into confusing tears. And the crying was only partially because I am in pre-ovulation. The tenderness and nobility he showed by approaching me and starting that awkward conversation was just so stunning. What an example he sets by this.

Since presumably we live at least somewhat near each other in a fairly cozy community, it is likely we will see each other again. I know now that if we do, it will be comfortable. But even if not, he made an impression on me and reminded me it’s ok to make the effort to keep neighborly bonds intact. We don’t have to go through the days ignoring strangers and neighbors, pretending we are islands or neglecting the effect we have on each other. He did not hit me. He was neither rude nor reckless. No harm was done aside from the momentary panic. He had no obligation whatsoever to ever mention it, but he did.

I swear my intention of honking my car horn was strictly to alert the oncoming vehicle to my presence there, not to express anger. But since I felt the anger immediately afterwards, all of it made me so nauseous. His boldness to resolve the conflict not only allowed me to let it go; it also inspired me to be bolder with neighborliness and more humble about my mistakes.

I am a nervous hugger, too, so there’s that problem. All of this also reminded me sometimes excessive handshakes are enough.

THE END.

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Filed Under: UncategorizedTagged: choose joy, community, daily life, humility, love, Oklahoma

BW part 2: the people who loved him into being

April 29, 2022

Thank you for checking in for part two of my interview with Handsome, aka BW, my amazing husband and the Lazy W artist in residence! If you haven’t seen part one yet, click over and enjoy.

Fred Rogers provided us all the notion of calling upon and thanking all the people from your life who “loved you into being.” I asked Brandy about his, and he surprised me with mentions of not only family mentors but also friends, people whose influence shaped important parts of his personality.

Brandy named childhood friends Larry, Rob, and Erin, who all showed him how to be comfortable, how to get “out of the house and out of the rut,” so much so that Brandy says they all three ruined him for adult friendships, ha! Now he gauges bonds based on how easy and natural they feel and by the absence of drama or competition, as he enjoyed with these guys.

Mrs. Boren was a next door neighbor all throughout Brandy’s life, a woman just slightly older than his parents who nestled herself into his young heart in myriad ways. Family legend includes a particular time in Brandy’s grade school years when she assured him that, “Sometimes a boy’s gotta do what a boy’s gotta do,” referring to the rare but righteous necessity of a fistfight when standing up to a bully. She offered this wisdom quite against what his Mom had already said, but she never backed down from it. As often as this sweet story has been told over the years, Brandy insists it represents the tip of the iceberg of Mrs. Boren’s influence. He said she was always available on her front porch when he got home from school, even in his high school and college years, ready to listen. She would offer him a cup of coffee and gently press stories and good values into his willing ears. She provided a safe and unchanging place for him, his whole life. She grew apples and roses. He describes her as being, “Soft with her flowers but hardcore in fighting for what was right.” My goodness this became a pillar of his character.

Anyone who knows Brandy also either knew his Mom, Judy, or has heard enough stories about her to feel like they were friends. Deeply influential to her youngest child, she was the person who bestowed on him his “tilting at windmills” tendency. She was often up in arms, impassioned for one cause or another, always ardently defending the defenseless, throwing all of her worldly resources (as well as what spiritual resources she could access by prayer) at whatever crisis had presented itself that day, for friends and family and even strangers. Like Brandy, Judy never knew when to say, “That’s not my problem.” It was both a blessing and a curse for her, as it is now for her baby boy. Judy was a joyful welcomer to everyone at holidays, as Brandy strives to be. She was also a music lover, a sometime street racer, and a fearless conservative happy to mobilize for any local candidate she deemed worthy. Brandy continues living with so much of her influence. He also has her laugh, which since her passing in 2013 has often caught me quite off guard.

Brandy described his Dad, Harvey, as a willing worker, a man who would be out there in the trenches with his guys, wearing an owner-manager’s shirt and tie, shunning the comfortable office chair to instead help mount a bumper or spray a car with paint. He said his dad worked so hard that he was constantly in trouble for ruining his clothes. Harvey taught his son by example to never ask your employees to do anything you aren’t willing to do. As a result, Harvey’s employees always cared about him.

Brandy meandered around these memories a bit, laughing to recall how often he had witnessed his Dad arguing with dishonest customers to defend his employees. Hindsight gives Brandy this appreciation: “Dad ran every business he was in the same way, whether it was owning the body shop, running the police department, the Sherriff’s Department, dealerships, he made sure the employees knew he was working with them.”

I would say the same about Harvey’s son. He proves year after year, crisis after crisis, and in every imaginable kind of work environment that he is more than willing to be right there in the thick of it all, never assigning anyone to do what he is unwilling to do. As with Harvey and his shop, Brandy’s team cares about him greatly. Both men have always been protective of their people, maybe to a fault, unafraid of conflicts with the public or with outside forces. I think their industries are much better for these passed down traits, even if the appearance sometimes makes them unpopular.

Brandy’s upbringing had an especially vivid religious coloration (matched only by his spiritual evolution as an adult, which we address in part 3). I asked him about the formation of this part of his personality. He thought for a moment and said, “I was born into it, more than anything. It was the central theme, with only a close second of politics in my life. It was probably formed as much with Grandma’s (influence) as it was Mom’s.” He reflected and explored some memories aloud for a few minutes then shared something beautiful about his Grandma Goldie, who was the Pastor and preacher of his childhood church congregation: “Just everything Grandma did was spiritually motivated, and she wasn’t preachy about it. She just lived that way. She exuded spirituality, it was beautiful.”

Goldie Goddard was a formative role model for him in many ways, including but certainly not limited to the church house. I only knew her for a few years, but she made a deep and beautiful impression on me, too. Her legacy is vibrant. Which of Grandma Goldie’s qualities do you think you inherited? He thought quietly for several moments, offering a few warm hums while he thought about her. “Boy that’s hard to say,” he finally broke the silence, “To think that you’ve picked anything up from someone like her is hard to imagine, because she was just so cool.” Another long pause, then, “The way she loved to have fun, she really did, she was someone who loved to have a good time and loved to be silly. She loved dress up. She loved making costumes, I think I got that from her.” He remembers sitting and playing in his Grandma’s sewing room, “just making something out of nothing, you know she loved that.” Goldie also loved video games, which Brandy certainly still does. She taught him to play, to play with kids, to enjoy and embrace the fun luxuries of modern life, despite what people might assume about her being a conservative female preacher. “She enjoyed TV more than she let on. Driving! You know, she loved cars.”

Goldie was a stellar home cook who established many of Brandy’s present day food obsessions. “Yeah, the food. The sugar. God she loved sugar. I got my sugar tooth from her probably!” Dear reader, to this day, if I make his Mom’s famous lemon ice box pie recipe, I hand the empty but still thickly coated cans of sweetened condensed milk to my husband, and he almost always tells a story about Grandma Goldie. I love it. Eagle Brand Time Machine.

He had still more to say about this woman, specifically about her marriage to his Grandpa Eddie: “I noticed their relationship before I noticed Mom and Dad. You know, as a kid you don’t really appreciate your parents’ love relationship, but I noticed Grandma and Grandpa were different. They were just always so loving, and so lovey-dovey, you know smooching and holding hands, all the time. It was okay to be good to each other. They were one of the few couples like that, who really loved to do for each other, not just one doing for the other… They did for each other constantly. And loved to, you can tell.”

What qualities do you admire in other people? BW was hesitant to answer this at first. He claims to often have trouble seeing the good in people out in society, but taking the question less abstractly helped. As he explored his heart for the people in his own life, the words and affection flowed.

Brandy gushed about our friend Meredith’s passionate love, the way she “lives the gospel of support and love, beyond just words.” He included Mer’s parents, Tom and Raylene, citing how much they love each and how they demonstrate their church’s motto, “Love All the People.” BW described this couple as “passionate in their spirituality,” and I could not agree more.

He talked about his friend and employee Geoff’s innocent, well meaning drive to help, not for any gain but just truly to be a help. Another colleague, Mark, possesses calm and reserve which Brandy admires. Those traits are a great cooling balm to Brandy’s constantly hot spirit at work. Maribeth taught him that you can be the smartest person in the room but not act like it. She showed him how to “help people in ways that doesn’t make them feel stupid.”

More friends filled his mind, David and Keri. This is a couple with longevity and endurance. They have been through hell and are still grieving so much. “They are open about their pain. They show their pain, they are still strong and strong together and love each other and love their community. They set very high standards from other people and are not ashamed of that.” He admires how David and Keri have managed to set up a force field of well being around their home. He thinks it’s admirable to value your peace and center so much that you can speak up for your needs and stand up for your values.

Now he was unstoppable. He sat up a little straighter as he listed people in his life and their good qualities.

He talked about Brandon and his “undying desire to be the first to passionately give.” Also Dennis, who has seen and done so much in his life yet is passive about his knowledge and experience. “Sometimes we forget what he is capable of, because Dennis doesn’t have to be at the center of anyone’s attention. He’s happy to let others take the reins yet always stay nearby to catch his friends. Dennis is a fount of knowledge, but he doesn’t have to pour it on everyone.”

My husband got misty when he named Jessica (our youngest daughter) and her way of, “clinging to the possible, especially because it takes a lot of effort from her, plus her desire to care for others. Jess shares that caretaking urge with Alex (her husband).” We guess that their mutual love for helping others might have been part of how the Universe drew them together.

Brandy admires selflessness in his wife and her ability to “care about strangers in a nanosecond.” He admires that drive to care for others’ physical spiritual, mental, emotional health. He said, “I think it’s a pretty cool ability to take on or absorb others’ pain, but I don’t want it as a trait for myself because it looks exhausting,” ha!

Maybe you would see someone as accomplished and widely talented as he is and assume he mostly values similar achievements and capacities. But those rarely catch his attention. In general, he just loves people who are genuinely kind. Our neighbors Rex and Cathy, also our new neighbor Tucker, are all truly kind and happy people, “just enjoying life and the people they love.” He affirmed, “It’s not cliché to say that’s where the riches are.”

What would you say to Jocelyn, if you could reach her? “It’s okay. We understand. We love you. We just want you home.”  He elaborated gently that he would not tell her we expect her to live here, just that we want her back in our life. She is greatly missed.

Which of your ancestors would you like to sit down and interview?  “Probably knowing what I know now… Victor.” Victor Goddard was Brandy’s maternal great-grandfather, a small town Oklahoma entrepreneur during the civil rights movement who famously passed away on Halloween. Victor was known for never showing leniency to children learning to play checkers, a tradition his great-grandson keeps to this day. “Well, he just had such a colorful although not good history that as a kid who didn’t understand, I’d love to ask him why on some things and see if you can separate fiction from fact or family story. From that I just mean he was at some pretty pivotal historic moments of mankind. He wasn’t just the old man playing checkers I knew.”

Friends, I cannot wait to get part three ready. It’s my favorite. He’s my favorite. Thank you for reading!

“Sometimes a boy’s gotta do
What a boy’s gotta do,”
~Naomi Boren
XOXOXO

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Filed Under: UncategorizedTagged: BRandy, BW, choose joy, family, gratitude, handsome, interviews, love

friday 5 at the farm, april 1, 2022

April 1, 2022

Hello friends, and happy Friday to you! Spring has 100% sprung at the farm, and I am staying pretty busy these days. As usual I have more stories to share than time to write them, but how about an old fashioned Friday 5 post, just to timestamp?

(1) SCARLETT: As of today, our precious adopted calf has officially been with us for four weeks. I could tell you at least thirteen stories from every single one of those days, she has so generously filled our home with love and dimension. She has the sweetest, most trusting, most innocent spirit (with eyes to match), and her frostbite injuries don’t seem to faze her too much (more updates on her in a separate post). Happy one month at the W, Little Miss!

(2) GARDENS & PROPERTY FACELIFTS: I can say with confidence and excitement that spring has sprung here. The redbuds and fruit trees are frilled with bright, tissue paper blossoms, the tulips and daffodils are showing off their Easter best, the hydrangeas and blackberry vines have sprouted tentative little green leaves, and one room of our house is overtaken with seed trays, heat mats, and grow lights. The seed sowing, misting, watching, reorienting, and misting again has been fun. I love the rush of “new life” energy this time of year. Outdoors, besides garden cleanup and planting a few beds of leafy greens and snow peas, I have enjoyed flipping, emptying, and refilling the three compost systems as often as natural decomposition allows it. As the vibrant colors of spring unfold, it’s the perfect time to consider how garden services can elevate your outdoor space even further. Whether you’re looking to create an enchanting flower bed or need assistance with landscape maintenance, professional gardeners can bring expertise and creativity to your gardening endeavors. They can help you choose the right plants for your climate and soil, ensuring that your garden thrives throughout the seasons.

Additionally, if you’re diving into composting like I am, experts can provide valuable insights on maximizing your compost systems for richer soil and healthier plants. Embracing this vibrant season and collaborating with knowledgeable garden services can enhance your experience and the beauty of your surroundings. For more information on how to get started with your gardening project, Visit Site to discover services tailored to your needs and aspirations.

A few days ago I discovered baby snakes had hatched in one compost bin, which is always a sure sign that warmth is here to stay. Handsome has been moving sapling pine trees to a new wildflower meadow for a privacy screen, and he is reconfiguring some of the pathways and driveways leading from the gravel drive to the lawn near the yurt, hoping to make circling through easier and prettier. Also, on a whim last weekend, he painted two large garage doors glossy black, to match other accents on our house and car shop. It looks so much better, I can’t believe we didn’t do that years ago! Love the black with our turquoise front door and lots of garden color, especially right now while the Jane magnolia is in bloom.

As the garden continues to flourish and the outdoor spaces transform, keeping everything tidy becomes an important task. Garden cleanup involves more than just removing dead leaves and debris; it also includes ensuring that every corner is prepared for the new growth. Just as I delight in nurturing my garden, I also appreciate the efficiency of professional cleaning services. For instance, GDI services offers specialized industrial cleaning solutions that can tackle the toughest challenges, ensuring that spaces remain pristine and functional. Their expertise ensures that both indoor and outdoor environments stay fresh and welcoming, allowing me to focus on enjoying the beauty and bounty of springtime.

(3) SHEPPS: Velvet and Lincoln are visiting the farm this week, and we have been having some fun! They are all aging slowly and appreciate a good nap (as pictured below), but between naps they still play and romp with lots of puppy energy. Velvet has delighted us with a brand new surge of affection for Handsome, a privilege for which he has been bargaining all these (nearly) seven years.

(4) BOOKS: Because I am elbow deep in two heftier than usual writing projects, I am not reading anything new right now. Instead, in spare moments, I am rereading chunks of The Well Gardened Mind by Dr. Sue Stuart Smith. Chapter six is especially mouthwatering, all about the culture of gardening versus farming and the value of growing things for pleasure before necessity. Gardening to thrive, in other words, not merely survive. It’s a theme popping up everywhere I look lately, and it feels important. In a few weeks we will be hosting a dinner discussion for The Book of Hope. Very excited about that.

(5) CAR SHOW: Last weekend we (meaning my husband, ha! but I did bring donuts and a picnic and keep Klaus entertained) helped our friend’s daughter and her college group host a charity car show in Edmond. It was the most beautiful day to be outdoors, and we so enjoyed seeing car show friends we hadn’t seen in a while. He trailered the Batmobile fir display, too, which is always a good time. The group did an excellent job pulling everything together, and they raised several hundred dollars for their school’s campaign to benefit the Children’s Miracle Network. Hopefully it was the first of not only their ongoing car show efforts but also our own packed car show season. We have really missed it these past two years!

Okay friends, what’s going on in your world? Are you primed and ready to grow something beautiful this year? Are you deep cleaning your house or maybe wrapping up spring break? What are you reading these days?

Thanks for checking in. See you soon for Scarlett stories and a brand new interview.

Redeem the Time
XOXOXOXO

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Filed Under: UncategorizedTagged: carpe diem, choose joy, farm life, friday 5 at the farm, gardening, gratitude, Klaus, scarlett

checking in post equinox

March 21, 2022

Friends, happy springtime. We made it! Barring the very real possibility of a frosty morning here and there, Oklahoma is on the cheerful upswing towards warmth and rebirth. Today we are drinking in a much needed gentle rainfall, windows open and a cleansing breeze combing through our senses. Clover patches are overtaking the dead lawns. Trees have leaf buds dotting their naked branches. Daffodils assure us that Old Man Winter had his rightful turn and is once again retreating.

Gardeners everywhere are either tending tray after tray of seedlings in their warmest interior rooms or already raking clean their flower beds and ruminating over their raised gardens for planting this year’s treasures. Will food prevail in 2022, to combat the price of groceries, or will more people grow flowers to celebrate a return to life and liberty? How will you pursue your gardening happiness?

((basil sprouts indoors, grown from last year’s seed))

For me, the answer is both, with a heavy lean to all things kitchen. I am also very excited to be actively mentoring a few friends plus Jessica and Alex for a big round of first time garden growers. This is a life pleasure I never knew to anticipate! Maybe the only thing more fun than growing my own garden is helping loved ones grow theirs.

I hope you’ll tune in again in the next few days. I have some stories to share about Miss Scarlett, our rescue calf. I have been sharing quite a bit about her on Facebook and Instagram, but right here on the blog will be a fun place to record more detailed updates for posterity. I also have a brand new interview to share, this one not about Pandemic, and the subject is our very own Handsome, aka BW, aka Farm Daddy, aka Director and Sir and brother and friend to so many. My husband!! I am so excited for this project, but I want it to be clean and sooth when I share it.

Until then, I will be writing stories and potting up seedlings, cleaning oak-leaf-filled garden beds and scrubbing dirty concrete floors. Feeding chickens and filling compost boxes, definitely making bottles for an unbelievably sweet baby cow. Keeping Klaus entertained but not reading much, not this week. In spare moments I have been rereading highlights from The Well Gardened Mind and drawing all kinds of fresh inspiration from that. I’ll find a new book once these two writing projects are complete.

((scarlett and her milk bubbles mouth))

What are you up to this week?

“The return of spring each year
can be endlessly relied on,
and in not dying when we die, we have a sense
of goodness going forward.
This is the garden’s most enduring consolation.”
~Dr. Sue Stuart Smith
The Well Gardened Mind
XOXOXOXO

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Filed Under: UncategorizedTagged: animals, choose joy, daily life, farm life, gardening, gratitude, springtime

late winter bliss list

February 26, 2022

It’s been a while since I have written a Bliss List, and as I sat down to remedy that I doubted my timing.

Russia has invaded Ukraine, I have friends and loved ones in crisis, and Jocelyn is still gone.  Life in general has plenty of heartache and shadows, so as usual I wrestle with the guilt of celebrating, well, anything.

And yet, what always wins that internal wrestling match is the knowledge that counting blessings matters. Giving time and attention to the goodness in our lives only allows it to multiply. Letting God know that we see and appreciate the answers He has already sent us keeps us on the lookout for the answers still coming.

  • Early in January I reflected on a full bodied, joyful holiday season, giving thanks for time with loved ones and the ability to celebrate in our favorite ways. We really had a magical Thanksgiving and Christmas season. Bliss to keep traditions the way we do and make note of the memories.
  • Clearing out the Christmas décor more thoughtfully than ever, taking time to scour the storage space and organize it all by season and holiday. Walking space!! Donations! Law and Order in the attic! Bliss to finally have that mammoth job done.
  • Tender moments with our friend who lost her Mom in January. A memorable sunset the night she passed moving funeral that honestly left us both inspired to live in quieter, more meaningful ways, and a glorious sunny day the afternoon of her burial. Sad, yes, but also bliss to experience that depth of love, even peripherally.
  • Innumerable long, loving conversations with Jess every week. Constant contact and ongoing closeness with her and Alex. A few surprise visits and always fun with the pups! Laika had a little surgery and Bean stayed at the farm for a few days. Bliss to share life with them in such natural, easy ways. Bliss to witness their love story and their growth as people.
  • I baked a snowflake cinnamon bread for Cara, one final holiday baking effort! And that same day Jessica and I went fabric shopping for her new aprons. I absolutely love seeing her thirst for color and flavor, both in the kitchen and in life. Bliss to be out in the world with my girl, to see a friend, and to share some creative energy.
  • In late January, my husband and I celebrated his mom Judy’s birthday, just the two of us. We had a long delayed meal at Saltgrass, the last restaurant she wanted to take us to before she died suddenly. I wrote her a long letter to her, trying to update her on the life events has missed since her passing, an impossible feat, but the act of trying was good for us, and we may have sparked a new tradition. Another sad day, but also, bliss to conjure up her spirit and to share our hushed grief a little bit.
  • Blood donation! This appointment had been rescheduled for many weeks due to weather, covid exposure, and other life complications; so it felt like a major accomplishment to get back on track. My blood pressure was super low that day, but still my left arm sprayed nearly black blood like a fountain all over the chair next to me. Bliss to be healthy enough to do this, to sit still for half an hour reading a book, and then to eat snacks all afternoon, ha.
  • We enjoyed a new Outreach project that fueled and motivated us for several weeks. A single mom and her twelve year old daughter had just arrived in Oklahoma after a long, treacherous journey fleeing wildfires and homelessness in California. We were inundated with donations from friends then went shopping to make sure their new home was well furnished and comfy. Meeting these sweet people after chatting for a few weeks, to prepare, was almost too much. Very emotional. Bliss to connect with strangers and have a small hand in helping them feel at home in our state.
  • Running has felt great the past few months, a gift for which I am so thankful. I have reminded myself that a speed workout once or twice per week is safe and fun. I have built mileage steadily, happily. And I have managed to resist exterior pressures about expensive races. Bliss to run better and on my own terms.
  • Two massive arctic storms, both of which could have been much more destructive, came and went since the holidays. We are so thankful for healthy, safe animals and for continual electricity. One of the storms brought heaps and heaps of gorgeous snow, which was really fun. This most recent storm that brought mostly sleet and ice was still pretty, and I am so thankful that Jess and BW and our other local loved ones stayed safe on the roads. Bliss to survive weird winter weather in Oklahoma.
  • Both Chanta and Dusty had health scares this past month, between the winter storms, and both of them turned out okay. I am so thankful for their health, so thankful for the thick blankets they wear during arctic blasts, so thankful for every happy year we enjoy with them. Bliss to see them walking and eating comfortably.
  • Surprise quality time with our friends Lynn and Jimmy Dale, time to laugh and dream and pray for all of our kids. Time to normalize parenting difficulties and heartaches, then laugh some more. Plus they let us try out their performance stilts! Bliss to enjoy easy, spontaneous quality time with friends.
  • Birthday gifts shipped to siblings in Los Angeles and Spain. Feeling better connected to them than ever before, despite the miles that separate us. Also daydreaming about trips to both places! Bliss to nurture adult friendship with my siblings.
  • It really makes me happy to have a loafing shed stuffed with giant round bales of hay. It’s as good a feeling, maybe better, as having the grocery shopping done a week before a major holiday. Bliss to be well prepared and secure.
  • Book discussion Zooms with friends in faraway places, personal prayerful video conference with two respected and beloved women, and a much needed Zoom with my sisters. I need these connections, and I am thankful for them. Bliss to connect with people in meaningful ways.
  • So many great books this winter! Since Thanksgiving I have already read more creative fiction than I did all of the previous year, and I am enjoying it. My spirit has needed it, this pleasure of reading books I want to read and reading books that stimulate my storytelling mind. Bliss to read slowly and deeply.
  • A few weeks ago I started shaping and amending soil for a brand new pizza garden! Oh my gosh, it’s so exciting. Bliss to wear thin gloves and let my body take over from memory, to feel my spade crunch through the sleeping earth, bliss to watch the blank circle emerge from the snow and mud. Bliss to work the compost, too.
  • We finally watched The Art of Racing in the Rain with Jess! Family pizza night. Good, relatable cry. Great laughs. Many cuddles with Klaus and Bean. Bliss in every way.
  • A couple of days in a row during a warm spell, we spent some quality time with our neighbors and new friends Rex and Cathy. They are so fun and easy to talk to, so rich in life experiences and so steeped in Love, being in their company is the best feeling. Bliss to have neighbors we love and enjoy so much.
  • I spent a few hours here and there with buckets of hot water, cleaning solutions, and scrub brushes, and I loved it. Bliss to get a head start on spring cleaning.
  • Another sweet and quiet Valentine’s Day, our traditional heart-shaped rib eye meal at home, and some very good romance, all of it like a warm and sexy quilt. Bliss.
  • Shortly after Valentine’s, we had one fiery marital disagreement that definitely hurt both of our feelings, one of those Clash of the Titans-style conflicts that thankfully doesn’t happen very often. But we both managed to express ourselves fully and honestly, then we reconciled in a few precious, unforgettable moments. Bliss to feel that authentic reconnection and deep peace.
  • We have a handful of small farm events coming up right around the corner, and planning them is a lot of fun. Bliss to anticipate gathering our people and to plan how to feed them and how we can set the stage for memory making.
  • One day this past week we fired up the yurt heater, ready with a pail of water for the sauna rocks, and luxuriated in a 150 degree room for probably too long, ha. Bliss to feel that deep, full body sweat in the dead of winter.
  • On the afternoon we were set to deliver a trailer stuffed with furniture, appliances, and home supplies to our Outreach family, our truck had some mechanical trouble. Dennis, Brandon, and Adam showed up, though, and saved the day. The guys are always there to help, and we don’t know what we would do without them. Bliss to have friends who always make a stressful situation more fun, and who always help.
  • Yesterday my sweet, smart husband sat with me for about two hours and answered dozens of layered questions for a brand new interview project. He indulged my curiosity, shared his heart, and made me fall in love with him all over again. Bliss to know your spouse of twenty years in ever deepening ways.

Choose joy. Inventory your pleasures and sensations. List your bliss. Allow and encourage light to overtake the darkness.

“Our daily noble pursuits make us human.
War awakens the preciousness of life
and reminds us to live each moment
to the glory of God.”
~Timothy Willard
XOXOXOXO

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Filed Under: UncategorizedTagged: bliss list, carpe diem, choose joy, family, farm life

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Hi! I'm Marie. Welcome to the Lazy W. xoxo

Hi! I’m Marie. This is the Lazy W.

A hobby farming, book reading, coffee drinking, romance having, miles running girl in Oklahoma. Soaking up the particular beauty of every day. Blogging on the side. Welcome to the Lazy W!

I Believe Strongly in the Power of Gratitude & Joy Seeking

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Lazy W Happenings Lately

  • dare you October 2, 2025
  • highs & lows lately September 13, 2025
  • to Judy at her baby’s milestone birthday August 26, 2025
  • late summer garden care & self care July 31, 2025
  • Friday 5 at the Farm, Gifts of Staycation July 18, 2025
"Edit your life freely and ruthlessly. It's your masterpiece after all." ~Nathan W. Morris

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