Lazy W Marie

Carpeing all the diems in semi-rural Oklahoma...xoxo

friday 5 at the farm: bouts of optimism

What a week! What a luscious, productive, happy week. And we still have the entire weekend to enjoy and maximize.

summertime flowers shade garden

Our weather here in Oklahoma has been unseasonably mild, so I was able to dive headlong into gardening tasks without once stopping to say, “Whew, hot enough fer ya?” Maybe it has been the weather, in fact, that spawned a pleasant wash of optimism. Here are five ways this optimism has manifested:

ONE: After wrestling all spring and summer with a muscle imbalance and some shifting tendon pain and joint stiffness, I am feeling pretty good again, almost fully normal. This week I have found myself thinking more about long term running goals, and this particular optimism is thrilling. In my situation, having the 2020 race calendar wiped clean is not a big deal. My heart goes out to my friends, many of whom are pretty devastated and also out lots of money for travel accomodations on top of race fees, but my goals will keep. I am in no hurry, and the joy I get from running is actually sweeter when I extract it in privacy.

TWO: Speaking of running, yesterday it seemed like a very good idea to take Klaus for a four or five mile run. We had such fun! He was all sparkly eyes and and high legs, exploring one of my favorite run spots in Choctaw. But we called it good after one mile and went home, ha! I finished on the treadmill while he slept like a sweet fluffy bear in winter hibernation.

THREE: With roughly 93 days still to grow food before our first frost, I planted lots of new seeds like small pumpkins and more winter squash. Also several new leafy greens and radishes. I also ordered even more seeds for the late summer push, many of which need almost 100 days to grow to food-fruition, ha! It feels good, though. It’s fine. I have a positive sense about them all.

FOUR: This week I have allowed myself to daydream more and more about travel, as unlikely as it seems right now. My imagination has included a tropical getaway with my husband, a fun New Orleans week, a hiking excursion in Colorado with Jocelyn and Jessica, a Mexico trip with Gen to run the Copper Canyon mountains, and even a trip to Europe. I would love, at some point, to visit Germany with Jessica (see the convent she once considered) and Spain with everyone to see Joey & Halee & their boys while they are deployed there, and Italy with Handsome. I was lucky enough to travel Italy at age 13 or 14, with our church choir. How amazing would it be to see it all again, as an adult.

FIVE: I woke up this morning to a husband who was ribs-deep in design plans for a sweat lodge. Or maybe a yurt. Ok like a spacious teepee, but not exactly. I personally want it to have a combination of Native American and Tibetan aesthetics. The functions will be various, for all kinds of health and wellness practices. More to come, friends; we are very, very, very excited. Something he and I have in common is a gnawing hunger to make plans, to build things, and to advance the farm constantly along its path to being a full bodied human retreat and community epicenter.

Wedding Meadows at sunset…xoxo

As I finish typing this, our overnight rain and thunder are edging eastward past the farm, and the sky is brightening up. Our forecast is less mild now, more summery from here on out, but we love that too. Having made good use of this past week of easy temps and low humidity, I am excited to sweat hard and luxuriate poolside again.

What has you feeling optimistic today? And is there anything on your heart, in your life, to which I can lend some of my optimism? I wish you something better than you expect. A long ribbon of magic that absolutely takes your breath away!

Believe it, give thanks for it all, ahead of time.
XOXOXOXO

beautiful start to august 2020

Hello, happy August! Our monthly threshold was made rich and beautiful from heavy doses of quality time, both with a few special loved ones and with each other. For these well spent hours I am deeply grateful.

Now we are charging our batteries for a very back to business work week. I suspect this first slice of solid routine, sans the visitors and staycation partying which pretty much defined the fun, gorgeous month of July, will be much easier than it could be, for two good reasons: 1.) We now have very fancy and futuristic high speed internet (wahoo!) and 2.) our weather is supposed to be especially mild. We’re talking crazy low humidity and daily temps from 65 to 89 degrees. This is almost unheard of for early August in Oklahoma!

And the gardens are at that luxurious stage when I just walk past and they pour out basketsful of zuchinni, peppers, tomatoes, herbs, and flowers. It is a non stop harvest lately, with watermelon coming soon. I plan to spend plenty of time in these upcoming mild days “working” outside. Heavy on the air quotes there, it is so much fun.

My gardening jobs this coming week will include: Weeding, pruning, feeding and watering literally everything, all the raised beds and blackberries especially. Excavating and rethinking the east facing flower bed. Mowing and edging the people-ish areas of the lawns. Scraping and scooping manure in the middle field and collecting chicken litter to add to the compost heaps, also flipping the compost heaps. Trading out the honeybee boxes and doing a hive inspection. Sweet talk the horses into having their hooves trimmed. Sweet talk the chickens into laying more eggs. Sweet talk Little Lady Marigold into, well, loving me.

This is a fun but ambitious list, and I very much want it finished before next weekend. Good thing I have nowhere to go!

midsummer harvest in my Eden

Are you gardening this summer? I want to hear everything! Tell me what you’re growing. What surprised you. What disappointed you. What inspired you. Tell me what is coming next in your garden.

And please share how you are approaching this fresh new week! Tomorrow is a full moon, by the way. An excellent time to release anything not serving you well. Burn regrets. Halt waste. Feel the fulness of your belssings, health, and happiness.

“He who keeps a garden
still his Eden keeps.”
XOXOXOXO

a restful, healing week

“It is the soul’s duty to be loyal to its own desires. It must abandon itself to its master passion.” -Rebecca West

This past week was the first time in many years, outside of a few occassions of convalescence, that we have enjoyed so much quiet, uninterrupted time with Jessica. (Although my husband might passionately argue that very much of our time was quiet, ha!)

It was luscious in every way. She and Bean went home today, and the farm is so quiet. We already miss them very much.

Image may contain: Jessica Hartley

Of our many exceptionally deep and fascinating conversations, one that has been echoing in my heart was about how humans are designed to crave beauty, how it is a natural appetite and a healthy inclination. We measured it against passion-gifts, too, like art and science, cooking and gardening and nesting, against caring for ourselves as women, and travel and the craving to explore this big world, and much more. We agreed that a hunger for beauty and a drive to pursue our unique passions can lead us down the best paths, if we watch our motivations.

My daily devotional entry from July 20th says, “Seek my face and you will find all that you have longed for. The deepest yearnings of your heart are for intimacy with me. Do not be afraid to be different from other people. The path I have called you to travel is exquisitely right for you.” (Jesus Calling)

This past week I was able to see the farm, and our home, through Jessica’s eyes a bit more deeply. A bare bones routine became soothing, not boring. I watched her slowly unwind and shed a landslide of stress from her body and spirit. She soaked up every day, morning till night, and every meal and activity we laid hold of, with a joyful kind of mindfulness that really inspired me. She allowed beauty and pleasure to overtake her, and more than ever she reflected and magnified all kinds of beauty, just by being herself, natural and free and untethered for a while. It was like watching overstressed plant rehydrate, turn emerald green, and bloom before your eyes.

Her health and happiness, and Jocelyn’s, is everything to us. This well timed investment of time and rest was so wise on Jess’ part, and I know that she was engaged enough in the retreat process to retain the feelings, to translate the efforts to her daily life and normal routine, in ways that only she can do.

I would like to chat more extensively about the pursuit of beauty in life, in the world at large. About how the deepest purpose in our various callings, is maybe to reflect Love? Soon, I hope. I am sleepy now and can feel my thoughts unraveling a bit. Thank you, friends, for the love you send our girls.

XOXOXOXO

impermanence

Yesterday afternoon, Handsome walked into the Apartment where Jess and I had parked to do some serious conversating. He announced playfully that between the dogs roughhousing and panting like monsters and the women talking nonstop, the temperature inside the house had risen five degrees. Ha! It might actually have been true. Once again, #sorrynotsorry

On Day 2 of Jess’ Farm Retreat, we swam, made frozen treats for the chickens, chased the dogs tirelessly, made Bean swim in a tiny inflatable pool donut, fed extra soft grass to the horses, discussed legiterally everything, made sprinkle sugar cookies via Joy the Baker, made homemade pizza from scratch, and watched a movie at the end of it all. Somewhere in there Jess managed a good old fashioned summertime afternoon nap, much needed and hard earned.

We had planned an art project like painting or scarecrow constructing, perhaps macrame, but got pleasantly sidetracked making the chickens’ frozen scraps treats. This is when the topic of impermanence arose. It was such a careful, loving task, walking around the farm collecting colorful flowers, herbs, and bits of fruits and vegies, then cleaning out the kitchen for more. We chopped everything and Jessica arranged it beautifully inside a bundt cake pan before filling the pan with water to freeze. All of this preparation for a treat that will freeze overnight and be toyed with, melted, and consumed tomorrow morning. A brief pleasure, an impermanent gift. But still joyful. We talked about the monks who work so hard on their intricate chalk mandalas, only to sweep them away once finished.

Have you seen Onward yet? Oh gosh. The three of us (five of us if you count the dogs which you definitely should) watched it tonight with our homemade pizzas and sprinkle cookies. It is not just cute and funny, it is also one of the most inclusive, soothing, loving Pixar films so far, with many beautiful messages. We all really loved it, and I actually felt a warm touch of grace for having seen it exactly on this night, exactly in this life chapter, exactly after a series of heavy conversations Jess and I have had this week.

I am not certain what tomorrow holds for us, both in the broader life sense as well as in the what will be doing on Friday sense, ha! But I know what our prayers are. I know what our values are. I know what binds us together and what fuels our work and our play. I know that Love is worth every bit of our trust and that magic is real.

Sweet sleep, friends! Thanks for checking in!

XOXOXOXO

marigold has wounded me deeply

This morning at first breakfast, Little Lady Marigold displayed a startling level of steadiness and composure. A tiny little stone colored frog had been perched on the edge of her bowl, and when I filled it with molasses scented grain, the frog jumped right up to her left shoulder. It landed in the deep, stressed-out tuft of her greyish fleece, and she did not even budge. For a sheep who still won’t let me cuddle her, she allows an amphibian passenger?? Gross.

Speaking of gross, the cats are still nursing. They seem content with jeans edges and such, but wow. How much longer can we expect this behavior?

Handsome was thankfully able to extend his staycation by a couple of days. It is not only needed; it is really needed. So we are relaxing a little extra today and tomorrow, expecting to resume daytime remote office duties early Wednesday morning. I skimmed an online article about how people are designing their work-from-home office spaces, and I really want him to ask me to do this for him, ha. It’s unlikely to happen, though, if only because he loves to work from either of his car shops. He takes advantage of every spare minute to either tinker with his fun cars or make progress on the Batmobile, and I totally get that. Are you following his Batmobile photos yet?

Today is Quarantine Day 128. We are enjoying some New Moon energy, and our late July weather could not be more luxurious. The first day of autumn (September 22nd) is a bright and glossy 64 days away, and our first average frost date is at least 101 days away. Probably more. These facts help me breathe deeply, like I am buffered by a wide, velvet greenbelt of summertime. I feel so lucky to live in Oklahoma, where the growing season is not only long but also multi-faceted. It gives us lots of choices and keeps us guessing. We have first spring, second spring, early summer, late summer, at least three autumns, and maybe an Indian summer too.

Jess has been working lots of overtime at the hospital and has scheduled her corresponding days off all together, rather than staggered like usual. It will look and feel like a nice vacation, but she will leave her vacation time untouched. Genius! We are excited for her to get some much needed rest, and we are really excited that she will spend part of her time off here at the farm. I have said it before with Jocelyn, and it is still true: Preparing a guest room for your adult kids before they visit is at least as much fun as preparing the nursery before going to the hospital. And that is saying a lot.

We are working on some fun projects for the upcoming school year, so stay tuned! And happy fresh new week, friends! Thanks as always for reading and for sending me your thoughts. I love hearing from you.

“Then tell me of your long journey home.”
~Cold Mountain
XOXOXOXO