Lazy W Marie

Carpeing all the diems in semi-rural Oklahoma...xoxo

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this is the true story about Klaus…

July 2, 2015

Once upon a time there was a farmer who wanted to collect all the animals in the land.

He desired a parrot, a bison, some llamas, cats, horses, iguanas, fish, and more.

He acquired them all, one by one. Sneakily.

But he had a real, grown up job that kept him away from the farm all day, every day.

So his wife stayed home to care for the animals.

And she loved the animals. So much! Really. But they kept her from doing other things.

So she perfected her George Bush impersonation, “Read my lips: No new animals!”

And for a while her husband cooperated. 

In fact they planned to thin the herd a little.

Then one day, quite against her urging, he brought home a new puppy.

And despite herself, like she was under some kind of spell, his wife fell madly in love. Again.

The puppy became more than just another farm animal; he was their baby.

He attached his giant paws to her legs and helped her cook and do chores.

He slept with the hobby farmer and his reluctantly affectionate wife.

And they all lived happily ever after, the man and wife and world’s best pup.

Klaus camo

Klaus big eyes

Klaus bath

Klaus cuddle

Klaus camaro

knlaus day 2

Klaus hair bite

Klaus smile garden

The End.
xoxoxoxo

Hey if you’re visiting from Kat’s link up, welcome to the Lazy W! So glad you are here. Hopefully I have already seen your post but if not, please leave me a note and I will hop on over. Have a lovely day! xoxo ~marie

11 Comments
Filed Under: animals, daily life, Mama KatTagged: Klaus

random farm updates

June 18, 2015

Hello again, and happy Thursday! Or happy whatever day you are reading this. Thank you so much for dropping in here. Lots is happening at the farm, and I feel like getting it all out.

the rose of sharon are blooming and the skies are churning...xoxo
The Rose of Sharon are blooming and the skies are churning…xoxo

The seasons are changing, then changing again, and basically keeping us guessing. Oklahoma is probably past tornado season but still dealing with torrential rains and flooding. The temperatures are nice and summery, though, so overall our gardens look amazing.

Volunteer squash. Yay!!
Volunteer squash. Yay!!

Except the east facing flower border. Some shrubs have overgrown, and three others (my red tipped photinas) have contracted a disease that made it necessary to remove them. Jeep-jeep to the rescue! I have big, colorful ideas for the newly wide open soil here.

jeep pull

I still do not have any honeybees to replace the hives that last season fell under attack from hive beetles, but that’s really my fault. Or at least, it’s a consequence of consciously prioritizing farm projects. The good news is that we still have scads of honeybees in the vicinity, and they visit us daily. I see them in the vitex (chaste tree), in the vegetable beds, flowers, fruit trees, everywhere. Chances are that the forest next door has several wild swarms practically begging for me to get my act together and catch them. It’s just a matter of time or the ability to clone myself.

Speaking of fruit trees, the plums are numerous and ripening slowly. I am so happy about this! At my childhood home in Oklahoma City my Mom grew a plum tree in our front yard, and I was unreasonably proud of it. Not that I had anything to do with it; it just made me happy. So petite and healthy, so beautiful and productive. I thought my mom was magic to be able to grow plums like that. So seeing my own plum tree now heavy with green and nearly purple fruit, silken and firm, it’s pretty thrilling. One of my apple trees, though, is suffering from some rain-related copper-colored fungus. Not the end of the world, but I will have to do something about that if and when the sun ever comes out for good.

The hens are still providing us with up to ten fresh, heavy eggs per day. Sometimes they lay in the barn, which is fun to discover, either in a hay nest or behind one of Handsome’s tool boxes. Our fridge is always full of eggs, and I’ve been selling them locally too. To me this is pure luxury. I eat eggs anytime I want, which is all day long; we sell enough eggs to continue feeding the flock; and everyone is happy. Except maybe the liquid chickens who are so delicious. : )

My sweet little sewing and embroidery machine has been putting in some good hours, exploring new patterns and fun fabric combinations. I am slowly but surely spending up our abundant scrap supply. Okay that’s not true. It’s unlikely we will every be empty of fabric scraps here. But the dent is noticeable, and it’s sure fun. I’m selling various little kitchen accessories, too, so drop me a line if you’re interested.

ruffled, appliqued,  & embroidered dish towels, each one unique, $9
Ruffled, appliqued, & embroidered dish towels, each one unique and slightly weird, $9
Don't fold it. Don't stir it. Don't blend it. WHIP IT. Whip it good. This is the beginning of an apron and towel set for a new bride. : ) 3-piece set for $25.
Don’t fold it. Don’t stir it. Don’t blend it. WHIP IT. Whip it good. This is the beginning of an apron and towel set for a new bride. : ) 3-pieces total for $25.

Basil, you guys. The basil is coming.

I just… I just don’t have enough words. I have recently enjoyed two meals with little specks of it on top, and I just know that with a few days of good, baking heat every bed where the fragrant sprouts are growing will explode with the beautiful stuff. Pesto is about to be a reality.

When is National Basil Day? There’s a designated calendar event for every other food in the world. Not basil? The King, nay, the Emperor of herbs? Somebody make a phone call. Handsome! Send a terse email. Let’s make this happen.

Look out, Spaghetti Sunday. I'm coming for ya.
Look out, Spaghetti Sunday. I’m coming for ya.

Book club gathered last week and I took some strawberry-oatmeal cookies. They were so legit. It was kind of a mash up of a few different recipes, so I will try to share that soon. Strawberries are so abundant right now! Fat of the Land, and all, Barbara Kingsolver would be proud.

strawberry cookie

I’ve been staying really active fitness-wise, just not running so much as before. Hence, no “Marathon Monday” posts lately. But that’s about to change because I crave it again, hard. In the two months or so since the marathon I have been doing more weights and Jillian Michaels videos, plus gobs of time on the elliptical and just running maybe twice per week. It’s been really nice to enjoy some variety in working out. I have noticed my stress levels drop significantly, and I am also down ten pounds. Yay!

Let’s see… Let’s see… What else?

Anything else new here?

We did make an addition to our farm family. Our farmily as Honey Rock Dawn might say.

Only the cutest, sweetest, smartest puppy in the WORLD!

knlaus day 2

But I bet you don’t want to hear all about Klaus the Wonder Pup,
The Most Perfect-Amazing-German-Shepherd-Baby-Genius ever born.

Do you?

I didn’t think so. I’ll save those scrumptious details for a whole new post. Soon. Right now I need to go cuddle him and sniff the basil.

Happiest possible Thursday! Or whatever day you are reading this! Okies, don’t float away!

Life is so good.
Over and out.
XOXO

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

2 Comments
Filed Under: animals, daily life, gardening, memories

friday 5 at the farm: fast woman

May 8, 2015

We have an indoor cat now and I kind of need to talk about it.

Let’s back up.

Do you know Fast Woman? The cat? Have you met her? Have I ever even mentioned this sweet crazy girl here before? Of all our many animals, Fast Woman has been part of our farm-ily second to the longest. She was born right around the same month we bought this place, actually, and she grew up tall and she grew up right with the Oklahoma cats on an Oklahoma night.

Sorry.

fast woman

Once upon a time Fast Woman gave us twenty thousand litters of perfect little kittens before I finally caught her to go get fixed. (Open laundry baskets and running cars don’t work with cats, FYI. I didn’t know. And she didn’t trust me for a while after that first try.)

Hey don’t you agree that getting an animal “fixed” is actually getting it broken? Whatevv.

All these years she has been an outdoor cat, wilding herself between the barn and the llama sheds, the gardens and the forest. She’s always been happy this way, and we have known this because on the rare occasions that we brought her indoors she would open her eyes to a terrifying wideness and jump straight up in the air, flinging her body against any window or door to escape.

She hated the indoors but ruled the barnyard. We were all at peace with this arrangement.

Then we adopted three more barn cats who regarded her as the interloper, not the princess of the Lazy W she truly is. To avoid being slap-battled and actively hated by Sonya and Natasha especially, Fast Woman wilded herself more deeply into the forest. She stayed gone for days.

Feral, almost. We missed her.

She visited the house sporadically for a while, then less and less, and sometimes her long periods of absence were so prolonged that we worried for her safety. We called for her, tried baiting her with food at the edge of the forest, and did all the magic card tricks and sorcery we knew to bring her home.

She just didn’t appear for a long time.

Then one day she did!

She crept around the south edge of the bonfire yard early one morning while we were Hot Tub Summit-ing, and Handsome carried her to the house, past the bully cats, into safety. This time, finally, she didn’t peel back her eyelids. She didn’t try jumping up and through every pane of glass to escape. Instead, she happily twirled our legs and purred and accepted every single edible treat we offered, which were many. So many. We were all three quite in love. Well, four if you count Pacino. But she does not reciprocate his deep and abiding love even though cats are his favorite next to baby chicks.

Anyway.

So, now Fast Woman is an indoor cat and I am smitten but at some loss. I’ve not lived indoors with a cat since I was about twelve or thirteen years old, and that cat wasn’t really my responsibility. His name was Garfunkle. He had a friend named Simon, in case you want to know.

Anyway, I have a lot to learn about indoor cats. And a lot of questions.

For Friday 5 this week, how about…

Things I Didn’t know About Indoor Cats:

  1. They actually ARE nocturnal! I sort of thought this was an old wive’s tale. Not at all. She sleeps all dang day (on the prettiest, comfiest couch we own) then around the time we head upstairs she’s like party tiiiiime!! The first two nights were like having a newborn, because I didn’t yet grasp the idea that she could be left to her own devices.
  2. Cats snore. Whoa, it’s actually a really adorable cross between snoring and purring, and it’s quite loud. You can hear it from upstairs if you’re quiet enough. I love it.
  3. Cats know the difference between the sound of a can of tuna being opened and a can of, say, tomatoes or cream of mushroom soup being opened. That’s just amazing.
  4. Sudden noises are scary to cats. I was frying an egg this morning and some butter popped and sizzled, and she lost her little cat mind. Back to the eyelid peeling and window pane jumping. Mix into that some cowering beneath the dining room table.
  5. Cats don’t come to you; they beckon you. Every other animal on the farm, with the possible exception of Dulcinea the hormonal llama, will come to you if you call. This includes the barn cats! Fast Woman, on the other hand, cannot be convinced to join us very many places inside the house. She’s just too comfy. She is, however, super happy if I join her on her couch. Which used to be my reading couch. Now it’s her shedding couch.

As I read back over this list I realize these things are perfectly cliche. Obviously I’m noticing exactly the things which comprise all classic cat jokes, which means I am probably well on my way to more cat cliches.

I’m okay with that. She is the best.

“The cat loves fish but hates wet feet.”
~Medieval Proverb
(also true)
XOXOXO

 

2 Comments
Filed Under: animals, daily life, Friday 5 at the FarmTagged: Fast Woman

this wonderful day was for the birds

April 9, 2015

What a day it has been for the birds! From early morning till afternoon I have enjoyed one feathered pleasure after another, and something tells me the evening will bring still more.

The earliest avian beauty happened while waking up with Handsome slowly, ever so slowly, during Hot Tub Summit. The sky was dark and moody and the farm was dead quiet. Then gradually, as if some unseen person was slowly turning up the volume on the world’s most charming soundtrack, birdsong filled the foggy south yard. From tree to tree, from cloud to grass, in perfect proportion to the growing daybreak, a delicate symphony. We started our day with who knows how many species of happy, peaceful, life-grabbing melodies. Divine. This really helped us carpe the diem with love and optimism.

After Perfect Coffee and halfway through Chores Round One, I noticed Pacino’s cage (out on the front lawn) was open (it was my fault; I’d left it closed but unlocked while doing some cleaning) and he had let himself out. His wings are not clipped so he can fly, although it rarely happens. Thankfully he stayed on top of his cage, just perched there all business like calling to me.

Maaaammmaaaaa!!!

I watched carefully and in a minute or so he climbed down the side of his cage to visit Fancy Louise, our sweet, cuddly hen who was convalescing in a smaller sheltering cage nearby. He really loves her so much. Everyone does! The whole scene was so sweet I put chores on hold to sit on the sun-baked driveway and just watch.

As soon as I sat down, Pacino promptly waddled over to me and then Mia joined us and there was much bird competition happening between the two, and so of course that all needed to be captured on video. The commotion drew the attention of llamas and cats and other geese, and eventually (though the video does not show this) the buffalo.

birdday pacino

birdday mia

Later in the day I had the very magical pleasure of taking two chickens to visit my friend Mrs. Robinson’s first grade classroom! This is the second time we have done this, and in fact the first time (last Spring) one of our feathered passengers (Ethel, one of the fancy Polish hens) was just a new little chick. The other one actually wasn’t a Lazy W resident yet. Frageelay (as we call him now) was hatched from an incubator in one of the second grade classrooms at Sky Ranch Elementary in OKC, so technically today was not so much a visit for him as a homecoming.

So I loaded a roomy, hay-lined cage into the front seat of my Jeep and drove to town. What a gorgeous afternoon, by the way! Perfect for being chicken ambassadors.

birdday jeep

birdday cage

The chickens and I stopped at the school’s front desk to sign in and say hello to all the nice office people. Suddenly Frageelay started crowing. LOUDLY. Do you remember when your kids were little and they did something slightly disruptive in public but it was so cute you couldn’t help but love every second of it?? That’s how it feels when your rooster crows extra loud in a pin-drop-silent grade school. I scolded him gently and then whispered promises of so many apple cores when we got home. My good, loud, pretty boy.

birdday checking in

We visited the teacher’s lounge first and made lots of friends. A few wonderful ladies were eating lunch, but no poultry dishes. And I don’t know how we are so lucky, but Mrs. Robinson’s blouse today was just spot-on for holding Ethel. I loved it!!

birdday julie

You almost can’t tell where Ethel ends and her blouse begins. So fun! Then Frageelay made his hot displeasure known again. I accidentally got a snapshot of Mrs. Robinson’s expression. I told you, this rooster is not quiet. This afternoon at Sky Ranch Elementary, his voice drew a crowd several times.

birdday surprised

birdday serious frageelay

This is his serious face.
It basically always looks like this, but sometimes it’s just extra serious.

Then we started making the rounds through the cafeteria and hallways, attracting sweet little hands and sing-song voices the whole way. I was thrilled by how many students remembered our chicken day last year! They even remembered the white rooster having hatched there, though they named him something else. I still can’t remember his original name! That’s horrible. Only one little boy asked if he could eat the chickens. Ha!

Mrs. Robinson cuddled Ethel in her arms pretty much the entire afternoon, which put that fancy little hen into a state of pure bliss. She napped and relaxed and as far as I know never pooped on anyone. It was the most precious thing.

And just look at this sweet young teacher loving on Frageelay! She absolutely made my day. I told her how much this adopted rooster loves to be held, and she nodded appreciatively, saying that well, that makes sense, because she held him a lot when he was a baby. (xoxoxo!!) I almost cried, not kidding.

birdday teacher 1

birdday teacher 2

birdday teacher 3

Another lucky and magical detail of the day is that earlier Mrs. Robinson had hosted another classroom visitor who was presenting to the kids a book about a polka-dotted chicken. Isn’t that great? It was all complete good fortune, barely planned at all.

The students were all so gentle and sweet and fun with the chickens. They asked both silly and smart questions. I really wish I had a tape recorder to capture the flurry of affection and inquisition. They petted the mostly unfamiliar creatures. They worried over Frageelay’s claws but also overcame that worry. They really wanted to know whether the two chickens were in love, married, having babies, etcetera, and I had to arrest my normally speedy answers and let Mrs. Robinson handle the delicate life-issues stuff. You never know which kids are able to cope with the idea that we eat liquid baby chickens (eggs). I also realize that not everyone is familiar with the idea of chicken husbands (roosters) having more than one wife (Ethel is part of a set with Lucy, you may recall). Life is complicated.

birdday with julie

Thank you, thank you, thank you, Mrs. Robinson and Sky Ranch Elementary!! What a fun afternoon we had. The Lazy W would be thrilled to visit your happy, loving school anytime. And of course it’s always the best thing ever to hug the neck of a woman from the past, when our young ladies were babies together. xoxo Sure seems like yesterday.

Not five minutes into our half hour drive back to the farm, these two feathery children of mine were passed out cold. They wrapped up in each other like a yin-yang symbol and slept hard while I listened to the radio and made sure Rascal Flatts never played (Frageelay can’t stand that group and I agree).

birdday crashed

And when I got home, guess who was out in the sun waiting for me? Pacino and Mia. Pacino was safely locked up, of course, but Mia was right there. Bothering the heck out of him. They both greeted me warmly. I returned Frageelay and Ethel to their love nest where Lucy was waiting impatiently. And I came inside to prepare our dinner.

Quiche. Made with fresh farm eggs, also known as liquid baby chickens.

Birds of different feathers can flock together
and sometimes they go to school.
XOXOXOXO

3 Comments
Filed Under: animals, daily life, memoriesTagged: animal ambassadors, backyard chickens, Mrs. Robinson, Skyranch Elementary

friday 5 at the farm: parrot life

March 6, 2015

Bobby Pacino, our blue and gold macaw, will be ten years old this spring. He was hatched somewhere in the United States and sold to us at a pet store in Oklahoma City when he was just a pup. Err, baby? Kitten? Chick. When he was just a chick. A small, quiet one.

The first few days he was home with us were a lot like having a newborn infant, especially with regard to feeding and bonding. It was actually a very sweet time.

Then the next solid, unrelenting decade was a lot like having a dysfunctional toddler, especially with regard to, well, pretty much everything. A loud, messy, screaming, demanding, attention seeking, affectionate and VERY smart, un-CANNILY smart, but also disruptive and destructive, toddler. It’s been a whirlwind. A loving whirlwind.

Surely I’ve acquainted you with him here and there on this blog, right?  I know I post photos of him to Instagram from time to time. Visitors to the dirt-and-hooves Lazy W cannot miss him. Pacino demands to not only meet but interact with everyone who enters the house or the yard, if it’s pretty weather and he’s outside in his big cage. Lots of our friends have become close with Pacino. Some are afraid of him. Others delight in ruffling his feathers. You know who you are. Pacino is a farm-ily member, and he is here to stay.

Yesterday I was reminded in myriad ways how different daily life can be when you live with a mature parrot. And friends, I use the word mature so loosely here I probably shouldn’t use it at all. But he is more or less of age; his personality is well formed; and he is vibrantly healthy and has full command of all his parrot faculties. He is a full time kinda guy. The thing is, he has spring fever or cabin fever or both, and this week he’s been telling me so.

pac 1

pac 2

pac 3

pac 4

“Hi, Mama. Gimme gimmee Kiiiiissss.”

 

So this installment of Friday 5 at the Farm is a cautionary tale for anyone who sees a parrot and thinks, “Oh how beautiful! He is magnificent! I wish IIIIIIII had a parrot!” Buyer beware, okay?

Five Things You Can’t Do When You Live With a Parrot

1. Talk on the phone. Pacino cannot stand to bear witness to what he perceives as a one-sided conversation. If he hears me talking, he naturally assumes I am talking to him. We are most of the time alone at the house together, after all. And if that phone conversation is filled with laughter, well, all the better. He joins in merrily and competes not quietly. The more I try to assert myself the worse it gets, and it seems I will never learn. So I rarely talk on the phone at all. I’ll chat with my best friend and my sister in law, like maybe once a month. Otherwise it’s just easier to text, seriously. The talking is just not worth the noise and drama on this end.

2. Watch yoga videos. Pacino especially likes female voices, and since most yoga videos are hosted by women I think that’s why he gets so riled up. But I literally have to sneak off to the furthest reaches of this house and close every door between us and play the video at low volume if I want any chance of watching and stretching in peace. Otherwise he screams and cries and attempts to opera sing at max volume the entire time. He wants to know this pretty yogi so much!! Not very Zen, you know? It really messes with my chakras and whatnot.

3. Eat anything all by yourself, especially things wrapped in cellophane. This is completely our fault, of course, because we have conditioned Pacino to accept all sorts of treats from us. But he now fully expects to share in any and all food that comes out of the kitchen, and it’s a problem.

4. Sweep the floor. This is ironic because Pacino’s indoor perch and his seed-scattering habits are the main reason we have to sweep the floor so many times per day. But he hates it. A lot. And he lets us know.

5. Kiss your husband. Birds are among the most territorial creatures I have ever encountered, and that is saying plenty. This glossy little blue Casanova is as jealous and needy as they come, so if Handsome and I feel like smooching, we have to do so at a safe distance or just accept the screaming and violent beak lunging that will inevitably follow.

********************

There. If you can cope with these five lifestyle changes then you are one half step closer to maybe considering you might possibly be ready for parrot ownership.

And let’s clear that up while we’re at it, too: You don’t own your parrot. Your parrot owns YOU. That’s the way it works, man. No getting out of that. But if you love each other it’s totally worth it.

Happy Friday!! I am signing off to go grab my first 18 mile run of this season. Very excited. See you soon for talk of translating literature and pregnancy metaphors and freezer cooking ideas. Have the best Friday ever, ok?

“Hi! Are ya Happy?”
~Bobby Pacino
xoxoxoxo

4 Comments
Filed Under: animals, daily life, Farm Life, Friday 5 at the Farm, funnyTagged: Bobby Pacino, Pacino, parrots

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Hi! I'm Marie. Welcome to the Lazy W. xoxo

Hi! I’m Marie. This is the Lazy W.

A hobby farming, book reading, coffee drinking, romance having, miles running girl in Oklahoma. Soaking up the particular beauty of every day. Blogging on the side. Welcome to the Lazy W!

I Believe Strongly in the Power of Gratitude & Joy Seeking

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