Lazy W Marie

Carpeing all the diems in semi-rural Oklahoma...xoxo

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trying to stall time and some special things this week

August 6, 2017

My brain has this notion that if I plan just a few extra events to break up our routine and also take time to write about our day to day living, then time will slow down a bit. Is this true? I mean, is this a sound theory? Because life is so great; we are happily obsessed with 97.46% of its details, but lately the days are slipping by way too quickly.

If you have any authority or expertise in this department, I will bake or work in your garden in exchange for your help. Thanks in advance.

********************

Following a lovely Monday with my nieces, this past Wednesday was so much fun. Whether my time-slowing theory works or not, Wednesday was a carpe-diem victory in every way.

After some basic early chores and a 7-ish mile run in Choctaw, I showered, did a little sewing, then picked up my long-lost gardening buddy Maddie and her youngest brother for a visit at the farm! We spent all afternoon swimming, brushing horses, and eating watermelon. I loved every minute. She is so good with him, he clearly adores her, and watching them together made me super nostalgic for my own siblings.

“Gabe, are you having fun?” “Why wouldn’t I be? We have watermelon!”

Except I was horrible to my own sibs. Cruel pranks, meanness, cold shoulders, you name it. Except with Genny for some reason. And Philip. I was pretty nice to them. Mostly Angela and Joey were just fun to tease, okay?

Ask me sometime about the school bus trick, ha!

Back to Wednesday.

A quick dust up around the house, a change of clothes, and by early evening Handsome and I were on the road to the Lake Hefner area.

Our friends Mickey and Kellie had invited us for dinner, and we all had the best time. We have been at several larger parties with them but alone just the four of us only once before, and we always enjoy their company so much. Wednesday night was such a treat.

More than a treat. Our dinner date turned into a long, meandering, nourishing conversation that left us feeling like we had known each other all our lives.

And the food was sublime, of course. Mickey and Kellie are foodies of the highest order, and they spoiled us with beef tenderloin, bacon-sauteed Brussels sprouts, and roasted potatoes then sent us home with extra portions of dessert, which was made-from-scratch strawberry shortcake.

By the way, Mickey is the friend I mentioned recently who helped me improve my running form! He is maintaining a mind-blowing streak right now. Crazy cool. And I love listening to him and Handsome talk cars.

Kellie feeds my brain with talk about magnetic earthing, total-person wellness, her love of both the beach and Colorado and excellent food, yoga, and a recent foray into Orange-Theory. I haven’t personally tried this workout yet, but her reviews alone get me interested.

While in their home we enjoyed some reluctant and therefore precious greyhound affection:

She’s blending, she’s blending!

After that mid-week burst of socializing, time did slow a bit, lusciously. Thursday thrummed with the leftover energy of all that love exchanged. And writing about it since then has helped press it all into my skin, again.

You write to live life twice, after all.

Since then, routines are keeping us busy. Running all the miles, collecting eggs and admiring the Memorial Day chicks, playing endless games of fetch with Sir Klaussen, watering and exploring the gardens.

 

 

Life is good. Beyond good.

If I cannot slow time exactly, then I will be content to magnify the moments.

Thanks to our friends and family for helping to make our week special. We love you all!

“Kindred spirits are not so scare as I used to think.
It’s splendid to find out there are so many of them in the world.”
~L.M. Montgomery,
Anne of Green Gables
XOXOXOXO

 

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Filed Under: daily life, friends, gardening, memories, running, time

scaling back & happy about it

June 15, 2017

Does anybody else have the disease where you cannot just learn and enjoy a simple skill without wanting to launch it into a massive community effort, or maybe a career, or under the right circumstances… a life calling? I for sure have that. It took me many years to admit it to myself, and I could do lots of armchair self-analysis to explain how I got to this point (hello leaving the public work force and still feeling guilty 17 year later)…

…But the bottom line is that I’m withdrawing from the Farmers’ Market and textiles business for a while. And yes, I definitely use the word “business” loosely here. Generously. Ironically. With loads of rainbows in my eyes and that haze of imagination around my head.

Why can’t I just have yoga deck and occasionally enjoy it with friends without brainstorming how to develop it into a yoga retreat space?

Why can’t I just cultivate the max amount of fruits, herbs, eggs and veggies that our family will eat without thinking I am morally obligated to sell enough to pay off our house?

Case in point: I made a gorgeous, decadent small batch of jelly yesterday from plums grown here on the farm and basically thought my name should be Smuckers. I agonized for three and a half hours over the economics of scale and what was wrong with me. See what I mean?

Why can’t I just sew gifts for people here and there without thinking I need to make an apron name for myself and compete with Jessie Steele or, more recently, the PW herself? Ha. Yeah, I know she doesn’t sit at home and sew those herself, but you get the idea. It’s a defeating train of thought and ultimately a grand waste of time and energy.

The thing is, none of these impulses are borne of wanting to fill a gap, not exactly. I mean maybe just a little. Really, it’s that my daily and weekly and monthly routines are so indulgent, so extravagant and satisfying, that keeping it all to myself feels weird. And yet, adding a variety of outbound, money-focused projects to the mix is just too much. It spoils everything.

Maybe I should just open a hippie commune.

I am kidding!

Mostly.

Enough for now. I just wanted to check in and say that, despite so many enthusiastic Facebook posts and private conversations lately, I will not be at any local farmers’ markets this summer. Nor am I likely to do a bunch of sewing unless you contact me privately for a special project. I have my hands full at the farm and am also happy to see some family changes coming down the road, for which I want to keep my time open.

Life is beautiful. So beautiful I just want to share it more often. That’s all.

Love you, friends. Thank you as always for checking in. I hope that however you spend it, you have the most satisfying day.

Carpe Diem
XOXOXOXO

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Filed Under: daily life, thinky stuff, time

motivation monday: life lately & 5 ways to keep up positive momentum

March 21, 2016

I can’t remember the last time I went for almost two weeks without blogging, ha! Not that big of a deal, but I do miss writing about the farm and connecting with you. My reasons for neglecting this space are good: Life is full to bursting with happy writing deadlines, interesting volunteer activities, and general momentum. I feel amazing bodily and heartily. Gratitude is seeping out of my bones.

Here’s the low down:

Gardens are awake! All over the farm! This consumes my senses as well as my imagination day after day. I want you to come walk through it all with me. Stuff is sprouting that I do not remember planting; and treasures are blooming that I had feared were lost.

Chickens are laying eggs again like gangbusters.

The statewide spring Beekeepers’ Conference was so fun, and I am just weeks away from new honey-makers. (squeal!!)

Running has picked back up, and my ankle feels amazing. I logged 23 miles last week and have 35 planned for this week. I feel like myself again. I’m beginning to look myself again, too, though happily that is now a lesser concern. Still unsure what races are in my immediate future, but I’m not worried about it.

Handsome and I have been cleaning out, organizing, and freshening up the farm in wonderful ways. Weekend warriors we are. The turnpike might be a phantom worry after all, and together with the weather inching toward true springtime, that happy news is giving us such a boost. We have that old craving to really improve our home. Our nest. Our beautiful sanctuary from the world.

Speaking of which, we have big delicious plans for the sunny, sandy front field. If you say it backwards, it’s nolemretaw.

Gardening class with Maddie is just downright pleasing my soul. She is insightful, sensitive, interested in growing her own food, and simply a pleasure to be with every Thursday. Last week we planted her first round of potatoes on Saint Patrick’s Day! Isn’t that cool? And she has been amending her flower bed with rotted horse and chicken manure (from our farm) and will soon be tackling early veggies. Love it all.

Handsome is blazing through obstacles at the Commish. He makes me so happy and proud. Oklahomans should know that your utility regulators work their guts out and care deeply for doing the right things. Balance, fairness, clean business. Three cheers for PUD!! xoxo

I signed up recently for my first trade/craft show. As “Green Goose” I will be selling handmade textiles at a cool little place not far from here, and locals… I would be thrilled to see you there! If it goes well, I will continue to show up once a month and will add fresh eggs and seasonal produce to my booth.

Let’s see… What else?

Hmm…

Well there is this small detail that soon I will be flying to Colorado to visit Jocelyn!! For the second time in a year I get to spend a week with her in her natural habitat. This time, no hotels. She has her own place now, and (can you even!!) she asked me to help her fix it up. Paint, organize, decorate, etc. We plan to cook together. Hang out. Work in her garden. She even asked me to babysit her beautiful puppy while she’s at work. I MEAN!!! xoxo

dream big, work hard ... xoxo
dream big, work hard … xoxo

So yes, life is wonderfully full. Week to week, day to day, we have no shortage of lovely ways to pursue happiness. And we tend to catch it too, which is amazing. I feel abundantly blessed and motivated right now. Maybe it would be worth sharing a few easy strategies for keeping up this healthy momentum:

Five Ways to Maintain Momentum

  • Eat well. Not too much, not too little, and plenty of whatever makes you feel amazing, long-term. You know what your body actually needs. Everyone has a different chemistry. For me it’s lots of raw fruits and veggies, some Greek yogurt and nuts, and more eggs and chicken than you can shake a stick at. Sometimes a salty snack or bowl of kale soup with lentils. (Magic elixir!) Also at least a gallon of water daily, plus caffeine. When I stick to a mellow eating plan (without severe dieting or endless indulging) I feel like I could do anything for hours and hours. And still be in a great mood.
  • Stay active, especially when you’re exhausted! Running is such a paradox, right? It’s kind of odd that when you feel deeply spent, you can force yourself out the door for just half an hour of hard running and suddenly feel re-energized. Have time for a longer run? Oh man. Make those to-do lists long. But of course you can stay active in hundreds of ways besides running. Even on “rest” days if I stay moving during most of the daylight hours I sleep so great and think so clearly. You too? Physical activity begets more energy and drives out mental fogginess for sure.
  • Yes, also sleep. Stay active but still make time to stretch and sleep, haha. My Fitbit has the peculiar ability to measure sleep patterns (sorcery!) and on my best nights I sleep an unbelievable 7 1/2 to 8 hours. This weekend I was alone in a hotel room on Friday night and slept less than 5 hours. Staying alert for the conference was at times challenging, especially because I was sitting a lot. (How do you office dwellers do it??) I got back to the farm Saturday night and made up for the sleep loss and inactivity with almost 9 solid hours of dreamless slumber, pure bliss! Needless to say, Sunday was grand. I had energy to spare and felt happy all day.
  • Mind your surroundings. I get so much more done and feel so much better along the way when my environment is bright and healthy. Happy. When the house is tidy, smelling great, and somewhat shiny ( no need for perfection every day), our laundry and ironing are caught up at least for the immediate future, and the middle field is (mostly) scraped clean of manure. Each of these are ongoing systems, of course; but that’s why doing a measurable amount of work every single day matters. And it just feeds the positive inertia.
  • Practice Active Gratitude. Every chance you get, notice small, beautiful details. Train your senses to zero in on beauty. Write that stuff down if you can. Say them aloud, even if you’re alone. Celebrate it! Share your excitement about life with others. At the end of every day, rather than bemoaning what didn’t get done or what could’ve gone better, give thanks. Count instead what went well, what you did accomplish, what grace and mercy were shown to you. Say thank you and smile all day, every day. Remember that your mind and body listen to each other and that life tends to reflect your attitude toward it in what it throws back at you.

Okay, can we chat about positive inertia in a different way?

Weekly Goals Instead of Daily Goals

One new ritual I am playing around with is using a master weekly goals list instead of a daily goals list. I tend to make my daily lists too long anyway. So long, in fact, they take several days to accomplish, so why not just admit that? haha! I tried this new approach last week and it helped so much. Last Monday morning I grabbed one of those ginormous wall-hanging white poster sheets of paper, like what you use on a flip-board for meetings? Using a permanent marker I filled one big page with concrete tasks that needed to be completed before the weekend. Many of them were either time-sensitive or required gradual progress. Not average daily jobs: stuff I would likely forget or procrastinate without some mental supervision. My list was red-inked and packed full and nearly grid-like in symmetry and kind of gorgeous. Since no one else is here to motivate me, this big red list served as my mental supervision, and for some reason it was so much better than a notebook-style planner or small paper on the fridge.

Daily Routine

Every single day I started with lots of coffee and happy chatting and life planning with my guy (Hot Tub Summit still reigns supreme). Then came tidying the house, planning our dinner that night, feeding the animals, and running however many miles my plan called for that day. Then I ate some feel-great food (see above), showered, and started nibbling at the master list. First most important thing first. Each day was a little different with regard to how much time was left after basic work for making progress on my goals, but pretty much Monday through Friday I was “done” and ready to get serious by 10 or 11 am. That lefts six or seven hours to focus before the after-office-evening rituals start with my guy. Well, 6 or 7 hours minus snacks and Facebook. : )

Focus

This approach kept me so focused you would not believe it. I felt more and more excited crossing items off the list each day. I was able to scan everything in one spot, looking for the next most important thing (remember Handsome’s excellent advice?); and my energy stayed strong. It was so great. By Friday afternoon when Maribeth and I hit the road for our conference, only two items remained undone, and I was able to finish those this the weekend. All of this made my little road trip waaaaaaay more enjoyable! It made for a restful, productive Sunday too, and now I am looking forward to writing a new ginormous list for this week.

Multi-task, or no?

One final thought, take it or leave it: I have largely abandoned multi-tasking, except for letting household machines work for me while I am doing something else. (Laundry, dishes, etc. Start those super early and be done with it.) I know multi-tasking used to be wildly popular and may still have its place, but this simpler approach seems to save me tons of time and also yields better results in my projects. No more trying to fulfill Master Gardener social media duties while blogging. No more trying to do beekeepers’ data entry while listening to a podcast. You get the idea. Maybe I can sew while listening to meaty stuff, but that’s about it.

One job at a time is great. And please… let’s soon talk about making more deliberate, life-affirming choices with what those jobs are. I have so many thoughts on choosing life instead of being dragged around by it.

Okay, thanks for checking in friends! Lots happening here at the W, as I am sure you’d say about your corner of paradise. Hope to meet again soon.

Carpe the heck out of those diems!
XOXOXOXO

 

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Filed Under: daily life, goals, thinky stuff, time

from unfocused to zen

March 10, 2016

Spring has sprung in Oklahoma, and soon even the stodgy old calendar will agree. My days are filled with worthwhile activity. My heart is brimming with hope and excitement for the immediate future. My mouth actually waters every time I notice a new pink or yellow bloom or that stunning wash of emerald-green in the middle field (which seemed to happen overnight). This week’s soaking rains have rinsed everything so clean, and the breeze is so mild again, that our air has a plump sweetness. It’s delicious. And it carries birdsong in that old, soft cotton, memorized-poem kind of way that we all love so much, especially at daybreak.

My Jane Magnolia has evolved from this just in the few days since I snapped this photo. Now she has almost as much green as pink, and she is gorgeous. Time marches onward!
My Jane Magnolia has evolved from this just in the few days since I snapped this photo. Now she has almost as much green as pink, and she is gorgeous. Time marches onward!

But I haven’t been feeling perfectly springtime-ish every day. Sometimes it takes some effort.

Handsome indulged me early this morning in a little coaching session. Or maybe you’d call it a pep talk or just a nice conversation between husband and wife about life lately. I shared with him that I am feeling a bit scattered, spread too thinly, and unfocused. And what he shared in return was so helpful. I have great respect for him. His words carry a lot of weight in my heart and mind, so his encouragement gave me a much-needed reset. He said to remember that everyone sometimes feels that way when they carry a variety of responsibilities and balance various priorities. (I don’t claim to carry the weight of the world; but I do manage a crazy-quilt lifestyle. It can be, well, crazy.) My guy said calmly that what you do is the first most important thing, then the next, then the next. Stay in control of your time and energy and know that you cannot do all of it all at once and that it is okay to set limits and say no. (I am paraphrasing, but he doesn’t mind.)

Simple, right? But the incoming tide of asks and offers and demands on our time and energy can be so brutal. Sometimes the world sees a person who doesn’t work outside the home and assumes that his or her free time is limitless and energy bottomless. And sometimes these people have a hard time saying no.

Our conversation was like a deep breath of that cool, sweet Oklahoma air. Cleansing. After he left for the Commish I comforted our dog because Klaus pouts for about ten minutes after his Daddy leaves, then I spent an hour doing just the first most important things on my day’s list, without letting my thoughts be pulled in every other direction, and I felt so energized. Soon I had a few minutes to notice again the details of this beautiful morning.

That is what I would add to my husband’s very good advice: When you’re feeling overwhelmed and scattered, start by focusing on small, beautiful details. Aim some of your energy at gratitude and allow your heart to settle on the gifts already at your feet. Then your mind will be more free to zero in on what must be done.

I love this combination approach of focus and gratitude. And articulating it now, I see that it’s a good blend of him and me.

God Bless Hot Tub Summits
XOXOXOXO

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Filed Under: daily life, gratitude, growth, thinky stuff, timeTagged: time management

Redeem the Time (Today)

February 5, 2013

   Last week or so I wrote for Edie my thoughts on time management, just my overall approach to making life count for what you want it to count for. Pardon all of those prepositions. Today I am thinking more in terms of right now, today, Tuesday, just these next eighteen hours or so. Since as all the poets tell us… all we really have is the present moment, it’s good once in a while to focus on that.

   Since last week’s grief, which kept us not just home but in our cave, Handsome and I have also taken a few days to be really sick. Like… running fevers and sleeping for a thousand hours at a time sick. So work here at the farm has been whittled down to the bare necessities. I am not quite where I should be with the marathon training schedule, nor am I completely caught on on ironing or animal habitat cleaning or even some semblance of order in the kitchen pantry. It’s one of those weeks when I feel pretty good just having the shopping and laundry done and the floors swept.

   But today is a good day. I can feel it in my bones. After such an outpouring of love and support from all of you and our family and friends, Handsome and I already feel the sadness lifting. The happy memory making is right around the corner! So no more tears.

   And the groundhog’s springtime promises are coming true too! Oklahoma is collecting one spring storm warning after another, and the days are so nice I have not used our house heater since early Sunday. Windows open. It’s my favorite.

   With so much catching up to do, I am seeing my time in small increments right now. How can I redeem this little golden chunk of minutes? What results can I squeeze out of this half hour, this jackpot of freedom which in more leisurely weeks might seem like nothing?

   As with any resource, there is a great blessing to being limited. The less you have something (for me, this week, it’s time), the more valuable it is. And the smarter you hopefully are in spending it. I am thoroughly enjoying the challenge of capturing pockets of time and finding out what they’re worth. Redeeming the hours and the minutes for groomed horses, accomplished writing goals, pressed laundry, shiny rooms, and clean gardens. Yesterday was a great start! And with its momentum I feel like today will be even better. Our errands for the farm are done for at least a week, so any time I can keep to myself will be spent on this castle and its grounds and citizens.

   Do you do this? Do you ever reduce your biggest goals and values down to how they translate to just one day? I believe that if our foundations and pillars are properly set, then our energy will work for us day by day. Late last night I read this in the Dietrich Bonhoeffer biography currently being devoured by our book club:

“Under the right blessing, life becomes healthy, secure, expectant, active, precisely because it is lived out of the source of life, strength, joy, activity… If human beings have passed on to loved ones and to many the blessing they have themselves received, then they have surely fulfilled the most important thing in life; then they have surely themselves become persons happy in God and have made others happy in God.”

   Expectant and active. I just love that. I love the entire passage. And I am so grateful to those of you who constantly share your joy and love, your blessings and wisdom. When it springs from the same source, it binds us all together.

   Thanks again for your generous love, everyone. Daphne’s memory post will be up later this week. And may your Tuesday absolutely glitter with new life and satisfying work!

   Take today as it stands and wring out of it everything you want. Rest tonight.

“Anyone can carry his burden however hard, until nightfall.
Anyone can do his work, however hard, for one day.
Anyone can live sweetly, patiently, lovingly, purely, 
   till the sun goes down.
And this is all life really means.”
~Robert Louis Stevenson
xoxoxo

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Filed Under: daily life, thinky stuff, time

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Hi! I'm Marie. Welcome to the Lazy W. xoxo

Hi! I’m Marie. This is the Lazy W.

A hobby farming, book reading, coffee drinking, romance having, miles running girl in Oklahoma. Soaking up the particular beauty of every day. Blogging on the side. Welcome to the Lazy W!

I Believe Strongly in the Power of Gratitude & Joy Seeking

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