Lazy W Marie

Carpeing all the diems in semi-rural Oklahoma...xoxo

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saying thank you for 2016

December 31, 2016

Soaking in our second Hot Tub Summit of the day, this time drenched in bright sunshine instead of stardust, I casually asked my husband how will he remember this past year. What stands out to him about 2016. He said that was too big a question to spring on a person, and of course he’s right. I have been meditating on this question for days and still have not distilled a complete answer.

These past twelve months have been wildly textured, rich with hurt and joy, adventure, romance, back-breaking labor, stress that made us brittle then relief that rinsed us clean and made us pliable again, accomplishments, failures, more accomplishments, and so much popcorn.

Thank goodness for homemade popcorn, really, and all the cuddling that comes with it.

I do not count myself among the folks who are weighed down mourning the apparently disproportionate loss of celebrities this year. To each his own, for sure. I admit that our 2016 In Memoriam will be a tear jerker when those video montages start circulating, but my real actual life has been such a roller coaster of grief and joy, and that roller coaster has lasted for so many years with almost no acknowledgement from the outside world, that I have little need to mourn strangers. Does that sound cold or dis-compassionate? It doesn’t feel that way. I just feel fairly focused on this gorgeous little nine-acre bubble here. Well, these nine acres plus all the places on Earth where our disconnected loved ones call home.

Love knows no property lines, of course. And maybe also not time.

I can barely remember whether I declared a big glittering resolution a year ago, but I am so happy to look back and see that the year was far better than I could have hoped or achieved on my own. The Law of Attraction must have a built in clause about excess and grace, because so many things have happened beyond my wildest imagination, it’s thrilling. I feel healthy, settled, strong, grateful, excited, nourished, and eyes-wide-open, you know?

That last one bears a cool distinction because for a while (a few years) there I was living so much by faith that my eyes were shut tight. If that makes any sense. I had to drive fast and hard and follow the curves completely blind in order to keep moving forward.

I am still relying on faith, as it always should be, but now minus the constant terror.

Anyway. If I had a resolution or even a theme word for 2016, I don’t remember it and have little interest in searching my blog or journal to know for sure. Life has brought me (us, I hope) to a better place.

Instagram “Top Nine” offers the following memories, based solely on likes:

top-9-2016-c

It was fun to walk down that lane. But I don’t put everything on Instagram. Those photographic archives don’t show the late night conversations with Jocelyn, the private moments of reflection spent reading challenging books, and certainly not the irreplaceable romance I enjoy with my husband. Even logging most of my sweaty, hard-earned miles one digital place or another, I cannot see anywhere online how much running has changed my life. My sister Angela’s full-spectrum journey back to health and the family is nowhere on the internet, and neither is my husband’s amazing career evolution.

No collective experience on social media, not even on this blog where I indulge myself constantly, can paint the full portrait of my life lately, and that’s good. That’s really, really good.

We still have unfulfilled longings, unanswered prayers, and goals for which we strive constantly. This also is really good, because we remain (mostly) humble and hungry.

youll-survive-c

It’s the last day of a spectacular year, and I just want to say THANK YOU to God, to all the elements of the Universe that have converged to answer our hopes and reward our work. I want to say thank you to our friends who have helped shape our world so beautifully, and even to our few enemies who are just living their own lives, after all. We learn plenty from you, and we don’t feel hate anymore.

Handsome and I have not quite decided how we’ll celebrate New Year’s Eve, because we both assumed it would be easy to find the right event, but everything locally is sold out, ha! It’s fine. Friday night we attended a wonderful engagement party for our friends Tami and Jason, and tomorrow night we are hosting a casual bonfire to kick off 2017 with easy fun. So if tonight we stay home with our animals and soak up a quiet countdown to midnight, that’s fine by me.

Homemade popcorn and cuddling sound perfect.

Then on to dreaming big for 2017.

dreamcatcher-c

See you next year, friends!

XOXOXOXO

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Filed Under: daily life, goals, grace, gratitude, Happy New Year, memories, thinky stuff

motivation monday: life lately & 5 ways to keep up positive momentum

March 21, 2016

I can’t remember the last time I went for almost two weeks without blogging, ha! Not that big of a deal, but I do miss writing about the farm and connecting with you. My reasons for neglecting this space are good: Life is full to bursting with happy writing deadlines, interesting volunteer activities, and general momentum. I feel amazing bodily and heartily. Gratitude is seeping out of my bones.

Here’s the low down:

Gardens are awake! All over the farm! This consumes my senses as well as my imagination day after day. I want you to come walk through it all with me. Stuff is sprouting that I do not remember planting; and treasures are blooming that I had feared were lost.

Chickens are laying eggs again like gangbusters.

The statewide spring Beekeepers’ Conference was so fun, and I am just weeks away from new honey-makers. (squeal!!)

Running has picked back up, and my ankle feels amazing. I logged 23 miles last week and have 35 planned for this week. I feel like myself again. I’m beginning to look myself again, too, though happily that is now a lesser concern. Still unsure what races are in my immediate future, but I’m not worried about it.

Handsome and I have been cleaning out, organizing, and freshening up the farm in wonderful ways. Weekend warriors we are. The turnpike might be a phantom worry after all, and together with the weather inching toward true springtime, that happy news is giving us such a boost. We have that old craving to really improve our home. Our nest. Our beautiful sanctuary from the world.

Speaking of which, we have big delicious plans for the sunny, sandy front field. If you say it backwards, it’s nolemretaw.

Gardening class with Maddie is just downright pleasing my soul. She is insightful, sensitive, interested in growing her own food, and simply a pleasure to be with every Thursday. Last week we planted her first round of potatoes on Saint Patrick’s Day! Isn’t that cool? And she has been amending her flower bed with rotted horse and chicken manure (from our farm) and will soon be tackling early veggies. Love it all.

Handsome is blazing through obstacles at the Commish. He makes me so happy and proud. Oklahomans should know that your utility regulators work their guts out and care deeply for doing the right things. Balance, fairness, clean business. Three cheers for PUD!! xoxo

I signed up recently for my first trade/craft show. As “Green Goose” I will be selling handmade textiles at a cool little place not far from here, and locals… I would be thrilled to see you there! If it goes well, I will continue to show up once a month and will add fresh eggs and seasonal produce to my booth.

Let’s see… What else?

Hmm…

Well there is this small detail that soon I will be flying to Colorado to visit Jocelyn!! For the second time in a year I get to spend a week with her in her natural habitat. This time, no hotels. She has her own place now, and (can you even!!) she asked me to help her fix it up. Paint, organize, decorate, etc. We plan to cook together. Hang out. Work in her garden. She even asked me to babysit her beautiful puppy while she’s at work. I MEAN!!! xoxo

dream big, work hard ... xoxo
dream big, work hard … xoxo

So yes, life is wonderfully full. Week to week, day to day, we have no shortage of lovely ways to pursue happiness. And we tend to catch it too, which is amazing. I feel abundantly blessed and motivated right now. Maybe it would be worth sharing a few easy strategies for keeping up this healthy momentum:

Five Ways to Maintain Momentum

  • Eat well. Not too much, not too little, and plenty of whatever makes you feel amazing, long-term. You know what your body actually needs. Everyone has a different chemistry. For me it’s lots of raw fruits and veggies, some Greek yogurt and nuts, and more eggs and chicken than you can shake a stick at. Sometimes a salty snack or bowl of kale soup with lentils. (Magic elixir!) Also at least a gallon of water daily, plus caffeine. When I stick to a mellow eating plan (without severe dieting or endless indulging) I feel like I could do anything for hours and hours. And still be in a great mood.
  • Stay active, especially when you’re exhausted! Running is such a paradox, right? It’s kind of odd that when you feel deeply spent, you can force yourself out the door for just half an hour of hard running and suddenly feel re-energized. Have time for a longer run? Oh man. Make those to-do lists long. But of course you can stay active in hundreds of ways besides running. Even on “rest” days if I stay moving during most of the daylight hours I sleep so great and think so clearly. You too? Physical activity begets more energy and drives out mental fogginess for sure.
  • Yes, also sleep. Stay active but still make time to stretch and sleep, haha. My Fitbit has the peculiar ability to measure sleep patterns (sorcery!) and on my best nights I sleep an unbelievable 7 1/2 to 8 hours. This weekend I was alone in a hotel room on Friday night and slept less than 5 hours. Staying alert for the conference was at times challenging, especially because I was sitting a lot. (How do you office dwellers do it??) I got back to the farm Saturday night and made up for the sleep loss and inactivity with almost 9 solid hours of dreamless slumber, pure bliss! Needless to say, Sunday was grand. I had energy to spare and felt happy all day.
  • Mind your surroundings. I get so much more done and feel so much better along the way when my environment is bright and healthy. Happy. When the house is tidy, smelling great, and somewhat shiny ( no need for perfection every day), our laundry and ironing are caught up at least for the immediate future, and the middle field is (mostly) scraped clean of manure. Each of these are ongoing systems, of course; but that’s why doing a measurable amount of work every single day matters. And it just feeds the positive inertia.
  • Practice Active Gratitude. Every chance you get, notice small, beautiful details. Train your senses to zero in on beauty. Write that stuff down if you can. Say them aloud, even if you’re alone. Celebrate it! Share your excitement about life with others. At the end of every day, rather than bemoaning what didn’t get done or what could’ve gone better, give thanks. Count instead what went well, what you did accomplish, what grace and mercy were shown to you. Say thank you and smile all day, every day. Remember that your mind and body listen to each other and that life tends to reflect your attitude toward it in what it throws back at you.

Okay, can we chat about positive inertia in a different way?

Weekly Goals Instead of Daily Goals

One new ritual I am playing around with is using a master weekly goals list instead of a daily goals list. I tend to make my daily lists too long anyway. So long, in fact, they take several days to accomplish, so why not just admit that? haha! I tried this new approach last week and it helped so much. Last Monday morning I grabbed one of those ginormous wall-hanging white poster sheets of paper, like what you use on a flip-board for meetings? Using a permanent marker I filled one big page with concrete tasks that needed to be completed before the weekend. Many of them were either time-sensitive or required gradual progress. Not average daily jobs: stuff I would likely forget or procrastinate without some mental supervision. My list was red-inked and packed full and nearly grid-like in symmetry and kind of gorgeous. Since no one else is here to motivate me, this big red list served as my mental supervision, and for some reason it was so much better than a notebook-style planner or small paper on the fridge.

Daily Routine

Every single day I started with lots of coffee and happy chatting and life planning with my guy (Hot Tub Summit still reigns supreme). Then came tidying the house, planning our dinner that night, feeding the animals, and running however many miles my plan called for that day. Then I ate some feel-great food (see above), showered, and started nibbling at the master list. First most important thing first. Each day was a little different with regard to how much time was left after basic work for making progress on my goals, but pretty much Monday through Friday I was “done” and ready to get serious by 10 or 11 am. That lefts six or seven hours to focus before the after-office-evening rituals start with my guy. Well, 6 or 7 hours minus snacks and Facebook. : )

Focus

This approach kept me so focused you would not believe it. I felt more and more excited crossing items off the list each day. I was able to scan everything in one spot, looking for the next most important thing (remember Handsome’s excellent advice?); and my energy stayed strong. It was so great. By Friday afternoon when Maribeth and I hit the road for our conference, only two items remained undone, and I was able to finish those this the weekend. All of this made my little road trip waaaaaaay more enjoyable! It made for a restful, productive Sunday too, and now I am looking forward to writing a new ginormous list for this week.

Multi-task, or no?

One final thought, take it or leave it: I have largely abandoned multi-tasking, except for letting household machines work for me while I am doing something else. (Laundry, dishes, etc. Start those super early and be done with it.) I know multi-tasking used to be wildly popular and may still have its place, but this simpler approach seems to save me tons of time and also yields better results in my projects. No more trying to fulfill Master Gardener social media duties while blogging. No more trying to do beekeepers’ data entry while listening to a podcast. You get the idea. Maybe I can sew while listening to meaty stuff, but that’s about it.

One job at a time is great. And please… let’s soon talk about making more deliberate, life-affirming choices with what those jobs are. I have so many thoughts on choosing life instead of being dragged around by it.

Okay, thanks for checking in friends! Lots happening here at the W, as I am sure you’d say about your corner of paradise. Hope to meet again soon.

Carpe the heck out of those diems!
XOXOXOXO

 

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Filed Under: daily life, goals, thinky stuff, time

reading plan 2016

December 28, 2015

How many books could you read in a year, and still keep your life in balance? What alchemy of books would you choose, to both challenge and comfort your mind and nourish your spirit as well as season your own writing? These are good questions to ask at the end of December, knowing that several weeks of cold weather and indoor cuddling lie ahead.

The owner of local book store Full Circle Books is known to read at least four brand new titles each week, while still running a successful business. My friend Melissa holds down a full time job, takes care of her parents and dogs, stays active socially, and last year read 85 books. Wow! I don’t know what the average is, but that sounds high.

This coming year I will pull away from Dinner Club With a Reading Problem and instead spend time reading my own lists of titles at my pwn pace. I am looking again at my “Want to Read” shelf on Goodreads to see what has slipped my memory. Plenty, to answer that question in a word. 289 books teasing my imagination, and that list is nowhere near complete.

So how to strategize? Here is my plan for the New Year:

2016 book plan BLUE

Twelve months, 36 books. That should be totally achievable and leave space for spontaneous finds along the way.

Four Difficult Books:
I am thinking along the lines of Infinite Jest by David Foster Wallace. One of these every quarter is fair, right? Maybe Don Quixote will happen after all. Not that the material of either of these is difficult; but the reading is awfully tedious. Also in the “difficult” category, though, would be The Shack by William Young. I read about 80% of it several years ago and stopped because of what was happening in my life at that time. Maybe now I can read it with wiser eyes, a stronger heart.

One Fiction Per Month: Easy-peasy. Talented authors abound. Fiction is what I want to write myself soon, so overdosing on a variety of styles is good. Plus so much fun.

One Non-Fiction Per Month: Lots of great choices out there. I love my friend Jennifer’s idea of going on a memoir safari and might diverge a bit on this theme. There are also, of course, so many great books out there on the creative process, lots of history, inspirational stuff, and on and on. Twelve non-fiction pieces should be almost automatic.

Something Translated to English: I recently listened to a Ted talk by Ann Morgan, who decided to expand her literary repertoire by spending a full year reading books from all around the globe, nothing written by British or North American authors. Totally inspirational. Check out her related blog A Year of Reading the World. With the exception of the first part of Don Quixote and a smattering of Greek mythology, I am pretty sure I have only read English literature, always. This shows great room for improvement.

Best Seller: I just want to hip and stylish, is that so wrong?

Rare Bird Lit: This is the publishing house in California where my friend Julia works. She has generously sent me a stack of books by several of her authors, and I have enjoyed every single one I have read so far, some more than others. This year I will dig into that stack again. 

New to Me Classic: It’s embarrassing how many widely accepted classics are foreign to me. Need to fix this.

Classic Re-Read: I can’t stop thinking of Nathaniel Hawthorne for some reason. Maybe because our perspective changes so much over time, and my tenth grade prejudices while reading The Scarlet Letter must surely have evolved by now. Gotta find out. No promises, though; another classic encore may suddenly seem way more important.

Summertime Guilty Pleasures: Three months of deck living calls for at least three guilty pleasure reads. Not sad about this plan.

f5f books lace

Okay, this is where my literary appetite is as of late December. I love the look and feel of a fresh, clean calendar, and knowing I have a year to explore this many different kinds of books is very exciting. What are your literary goals for 2016? Are you on Goodreads? I’d love to stalk you there.

“A book is like a garden carried in the pocket.”
~Chinese proverb
XOXOXOXO

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Filed Under: books, goals, Julia, new year, Rare Bird Lit, reading

crossing over into a fresh new year

December 27, 2015

Sunday, late morning, the weekend after Christmas. Oklahoma is enduring an ice bath and typically vicious winds. Handsome and I are wearing cozy things like flannel pajamas and eating fun snacks like popcorn, cheddar slices, crackers, and turkey. The farm is well stocked and in good repair, making it perfectly luxurious to just stay home and hibernate. We are playing the full Star Wars series for Klaus to watch in order, starting with Episode IV of course, so that he may grow up with the proper morals and one day be a good dog who chooses to use the force for good. Pacino is in the living room purring and telling himself what a good boy he already is. Christmas lights are still glowing all over the house because they are so pretty and I like that kind of thing.

The end of 2015 is fast approaching. When I think back over the last twelve months I am overwhelmed with gratitude. Life has been full of surprises, mostly good ones, and no matter how stressful or scary the hours have been from time to time, the overarching mood of the days and weeks has been joy. My heart is overflowing with more than optimism; I truly feel excitement about the future.

2015 photo collage

My husband’s career is showing signs of deep relief and great leaps forward. The farm is growing and shrinking according to our mutual desires. Our oldest daughter is finding romance, adventure, and self-sufficiency in Colorado. Our youngest daughter is far from us in circumstance but so near to our hearts. I dream of her regularly and pray for her almost as constantly as I breathe. Other prayers have been answered in such stunning displays of grace; how could anyone ever doubt that this all important miracle is not on its way?

My baby, also picking me some wildflowers, also Mother's Day 2007.
My baby Jessica picking me some wildflowers at the Buffalo Mountain, Mother’s Day 2007.

On the personal front, I learned so much this past year about health and fitness. I’m excited to train for my next marathon with this experience and knowledge and maybe fit more easily into my skinny jeans too.

I ran the 2015 springmarathon badly, trying to diet during taper week, and paid for it. Then I lost weight and got faster over the summer. Then I hosted eight big parties in a row and gained the weight back, haha. Now I am excited to get back at it. the 2016 race will be the bomb dot com.
I ran the 2015 springmarathon badly, trying to diet during taper week, and paid for it. Then I lost weight and got faster over the summer. Then I hosted eight big parties in a row and gained the weight back, haha. Now I am excited to get back in a routine. The April 2016 race will be the bomb dot com.

I have started a little apron business that is not only profitable but really fun. The Oklahoma County Master Gardeners Association is a more permanent part of my life and schedule now (I am on the Social Media team), as is the Oklahoma Beekeepers’ Association (I’m the new state secretary). Lots of fun stuff coming around the bend in 2016 with both of these organizations.

apron room

Will 2016 be the year I draft a full piece of fiction? And stop blogging to do this? Or level up my blogging in order to sell more textiles and produce? What does SEO even mean? Will we sell the farm because of the new turnpike rumors? (If you haven’t heard, some sources predict the new Oklahoma turnpike could run exactly across our front pasture. Meh objects. He strenuously objects. We shall see.) If we stay, will be tackle a remodeling project or three? 

fri5 meh wet c

Hopefully we will visit our beloved French Quarter before long, and I will do everything in my power to get Handsome to a white sand beach before he self-destructs. In my wildest dreams, we also visit some place completely foreign to both of us. And of course I go see our girl in the Rockies too. She has her own cabin there, and a new puppy, and a healthy dose of True Love.

forever new orleans

Will the Lazy W Honeymakers make a comeback? Will the hens continue to lay eggs even in frigid temperatures? What about squash bugs? This could be the year I use chemical pesticides. Please withhold judgement; there is a smart way to do this. Yes to growing and selling watermelons that rival Rush Springs.

I am pulling away from Book Club for now and forming my own reading list for the coming year. Don Quixote is probably still not on the list, sadly. But Infinite Jest? Maybe so. I would love to see you on Goodreads to trade titles and reviews this year.

So much gratitude for the life we have been living. So many endless possibilities for the future, both near and far.

Friends, I want to thank you again for stopping here. Thank you for reading, for offering encouragement and insight, thank you for your prayers. Thank you for sharing your life with us in myriad ways this past year. Thank you for helping me sort out my thoughts so often. You are a wonderful gift.

colorful south garden

Now let’s do some relaxing and recharging. Let’s give so much thanks for a good, solid 2015 and start making grand plans for an even better 2016. Much love to you from the Lazy W!

“Write it on your heart that every day
is the best day 
in the year.”

~Benjamin Franklin
XOXOXOXO

 

 

 

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Filed Under: daily life, goals, gratitude, memories, thinky stuff

My Word for 2013: STRENGTH

January 3, 2013

   Happy New Year friends! Happy first Thursday of the fresh, clean, brand spanking  new set of months and moments! Happy cold, frosty morning (if you are in Oklahoma) and Happy Another Chance to Try Big Things and Chart New Territory. Do you feel the energy? Much more than caffeine, I feel it. I feel the pulsing, sparkling sense of possibility and hope all around me.

I’m a spring and summer person for sure, 
but this year is the farthest I have ever felt from a “winter of discontent.”
My heart is so full, my mind is so stimulated,
and my spirit is so encouraged… that where dormancy is evident,
I see only possibility, only life building up her wonderful stores.

   My personal resolutions are too many to count, and since last year I fell into the tantalizing habit of calling them reVolutions, they evolve anyway according to need and passion. So to mark the first of the year, and as an homage to the deep and communal love we all share for words, my word of the year is…

STRENGTH.

   Strength, in so many manifestations.

   Strength of body, because in two weeks I begin training in earnest for my first half marathon, which will happen in late April.

   Strength of spirit, as I flex repeatedly against that Worry Door and face new challenges and pains resolutely.

   Strength in finances, domestic pursuits, and daily goal tending. Strength to keep my promises. Strength to maximize the potential of our fabulous little book club.

   Strength to bend but not break… Strength to grow and bear fruit… Strength to admit my faults and overcome them. Strength to trust more fully, love more freely, and give of my true self (not my competitive, imagined self) more generously. Strength to hang on tight and let go gently, and strength to know when to do each.

   The possibilities for 2013 are endless!! I shudder almost to articulate them, though, because the year is so young I still have that waking sensation you get between dreaming and living when you can still enjoy the vision but dare not focus too hard on it, or it evaporates.

   Thank you to everyone who has been nibbling around this digital Lazy W this past year! I appreciate all of the comments, the emails, and funny, smart, touching interactions. Sometimes I cannot believe how many wonderful people I have met “here.” Thanks to those of you who have visited the dirt and hooves Lazy W this year too, and helped Handsome and me make so many fun memories. Our home is richer for the time spent with you. Also, thanks to those of you sharing your own wonderful stories. I treasure these connections so much.

   So, cheers to the close of a rich, wonderful year! And cheers to the startlingly gorgeous beginning of a new one! Love to you all.

“Only those who risk going too far
Can ever possibly find out how far one can go.”
~T.S. Elliott
xoxoxoxo 


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Filed Under: daily life, goals, new year, revolutions, thinky stuff

Hi! I'm Marie. Welcome to the Lazy W. xoxo

Hi! I’m Marie. This is the Lazy W.

A hobby farming, book reading, coffee drinking, romance having, miles running girl in Oklahoma. Soaking up the particular beauty of every day. Blogging on the side. Welcome to the Lazy W!

I Believe Strongly in the Power of Gratitude & Joy Seeking

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