Lazy W Marie

Carpeing all the diems in semi-rural Oklahoma...xoxo

You are here: Home / Archives for gratitude

friday 5 at the farm, camera roll short stories

Because, as always, life is bursting with long, deep, worthwhile stories but also, therefore, are my days too full to properly tell them all, how about a quick look at cell phone snapshots from the previous few days? I’ll hit the high points.

Oklahoma Weather: Depending on your perspective and chosen activity, our weather lately has been either gloriously cool and wet or murderously humid. You have to admit, though, it is wonderful to be a week and a half deep in August sunshine and see the ponds and lakes overflowing instead of burning up to cracked-apart mudholes as so often happens this time of year. And we could easily be in triple digits again. Yes, we have mosquitoes, and yes, running and working outdoors can be challenging; but the gardens are bonkers! The hay meadows are lush and heavy with big round bales, freshly cut. And the Lazy W chickens are sure happy, too. Egg production is up from 4 per day to 11 or 13. I’ll take it! 

Nourishment: So much great food. Every day I am learning more details and themes about what my body needs to feel great and not only get the most from my workouts (so different right now) but also stay feeling amazing for the rest of the workday.

Except for Tuesday, when I ate one million and a half cashews (fail number one), and Wednesday, when I let myself get too hungry during the thunderstorms and ate a third of a box of Triscuits (fail number two), I have paid good attention to nutrients and the size of my meals and just overall stressing way less about stuff. I will write more about this in an upcoming health post, but the whole shift away from running has kind of messed with my mind a little.

The photo below was from Monday, our traditional weekly pasta meal. Whole wheat noodles (LOVE them) with fresh garden tomatoes, mushrooms, zucchini, and some shredded chicken breast. Add garden fresh basil, obviously. So filling and tasty! And I felt that ticklish, content feeling while eating it with no regrets later. Unlike the day I inhaled the truckload of cashews.

Shameless Sweaty Selfie: Taken after a particularly exhilarating 9-mile run, fasted but well hydrated. Behold the blotchy skin and copious amounts of sweat. This was only one of two times this week that running felt really great, so I had to capture the moment. The funny thing was that my pace was only about 20 seconds per mile off from the day before when I felt like I was literally going to die, but this run was like flight. Bouncy, strong, filled with that lemon-juice-and-trampoline energy, you know? Endorphin City. (My car was parked.)

New Farm Animal Alert: Oh I forgot to tell you guys we adopted a big strong gorgeous boxing kangaroo! Smiling is his favorite. We love him so much it hurts a little.

And for the grand finale…

Jessica Turns 21: This is certainly one of those milestones that begs a long, fully explored, detailed writing. And I have tried, believe me. While writing for a few hours twice lately, attempting to wrangle the emotion, most of the words got stuck somewhere between my ribcage and my hands. Finally, it seemed like the words that did make it out were meant more for her, privately, And that’s ok. I know most people will understand that. But here is a snapshot of the three of us at dinner this Thursday, a very happy moment in the midst of a very happy life. And look at the words above our heads!! We got our baby back.

And I know in my heart that soon Joc will be joining us in these special moments. I feel it. We believe it.

Okay, onward to the next interesting project!! Handsome is home early today spraying paint on his big behemoth Cadillac. Klaus (the kangaroo) is napping between bouts of fetch and llama chasing. I have a pile of excellent things to do. 

What is new in your world? What snapshots from your cell phone could tell some pretty great stories? 

Happy Friday!! Thanks as always for checking in!

Redeem the Time
XOXOXOXO

 

cultivate

After a gentle, soaking rain this morning, we went outside to survey the farm and accept some of the afternoon’s unexpected sunshine. It was warm, but in the shade still plenty comfortable. My husband loaded the spool of the weedeater and started tracing clean lines around every raised bed, sidewalk, and rock border. This makes us both so happy. Clean edges are heaven.

I fed the animals, played fetch with Klaus, and started pulling weeds from inside those edges. So many weeds lately, everywhere you look. The lushness of our summer weather extends to all forms of life at the Lazy W.

I mentally celebrated the rambling hyacinth bean vines and vibrant gomphrena and zinnias, gave thanks for the tomatoes and basil, and got a jolt of early excitement thinking of the seeds that were planted yesterday, in the bare earth where all forms of zucchini vines had been. (I do hate squash bugs.)

Then I saw the daylilies. They seem to have stopped blooming too early this year, and that’s a shame because they are normally so tall and gorgeous, such a deep, electric shade of orange. Lately, I see only the decapitated stalks, sometimes hanging onto a withered dry bloom, the plants’ brown leaves falling exhaustedly downward. Too early.

I started combing away the dead parts, gloveless, and scooping them into my wheelbarrow already full of weeds and dead stuff. My hands went after the task easily, twisting and pulling old lilies from the pliant earth.

I caught sight of one fistful of green and brown and realized it was not lilies. I was pulling grass, too. But a foot or two up, the grass looked and felt so much like the daylilies that I hadn’t noticed. I threaded my way up and down and forested through the flower bed to see exactly what was growing and where.

I was kind of stunned to see how much grass was choking out the daylily stands, but also relieved. Maybe cleaning everything out would rejuvenate the flower bed.

The thing that really stuck with me was how similar the grass felt to the flowers. An uninvited imitator, a fraud. And one that had gone undetected for a while yet was easily uprooted.

It all leaned hard into my thinking lately about cultivating. Pulling up what doesn’t belong to make room for what does. Cultivating. Feeding what you want to grow. Eliminating what no longer serves you. I couldn’t stop smiling as those grassroots popped out of the damp earth and sprinkled dirt on my face and arms. 

This is a snapshot of the shade garden about a week ago. It has already changed so much, again.

Cultivate.

Cultivate our homes, our work environments. Our routines. Our work products, after all. Our diets. Our social media feeds. Our reading material. Our schedules. 

Cultivate our relationships. Our friendships, family bonds, romances, all of it.

I adore the idea of cultivating our lives in every way. To my thinking, it all comes down to the smallest things. For all the big planning we do, all the garden architecture and herculean seasonal efforts, sometimes we need to kneel down and feel each thing by hand, no gloves, face to face with the details. Uproot the bad habits in the exact moments that you see them and make the yes/no choices one at a time, slowly and mindfully. 

So that all the things we do want more of have all the space they need to flourish. 

Just some food for thought on this gorgeous Sunday afternoon. 

“We must cultivate our own garden.
When man was put in the garden of Eden
he was put there so that he should work,
which proves that man was not born to rest.”
~ Voltaire
XOXOXOXO

 

 

 

friday 5 at the farm, tidbits this week

Hey friends and happy Friday!! Whew.

For us, this was the first week back in full swing following two weeks of travel and staycation, and we feel it. In good ways, mostly, because life is beautiful. It feels great to be back in healthy, deliberate routines. And we feel so blessed and buffered, you know? And tired, haha. My husband especially. He returned to the Commish early Monday morning and after several twelve hour days has crashed at the farm every evening, drained to the max. We are looking forward to a fun, restorative weekend filled with a nice mix of work and play.

Here’s a quick Friday 5 at the Farm post, just a handful of noteworthy details that set this past week apart.

#1. Weirdest Homemade Meal That was Very Amazing: Oats microwaved with zucchini noodles and milk plus two over-easy eggs. You guys. I am smitten. Delicious, filling, super good for my body at that exact moment. And now I’m hooked.

#2. Klaus Discovered his Reflection in a Mirror: He was super cute about it. He peered at his own image then caught sight of mine and followed me around the room, seeking eye contact but in the mirror. He even brought one of his favorite un-fluffed bears to share with his glassy twin, but when I crouched down and was affectionate to the other Klaus, the real Klaus was not happy and scooped up my hands in his paws and kissed my face. I took a dozen photos. I will only burden you with this one. 

#3. Fancy Chicken Food: Every night this week I have been freezing our kitchen scraps in a bundt pan filled in with water and offering it to the flock the next morning. They are appreciative enough but no less demanding about the exact contents of the ice sculptures. I hope they don’t start expecting turndown service, too. Or mints on their hay pillows. Although they do get springs of mint from the garden. 

#4. Another Fun Family Night: Wednesday evening our whole (local) family gathered at The Garage burger restaurant in Del City to celebrate our beautiful niece Kenzie’s 11th birthday!! This was after I got to spend most of the day with Jessica, my youngest, who also joined us! You could say my heart was full to bursting. We love you so much, Kenz!!

#5. Egg Apron for the Win: Twice this week I spent a few hours in the Apartment, not just ironing for the first time in two weeks but also sewing! So fun!! My aunt Kristi in Texas is keeping backyard hens and requested one of those cute egg-collecting aprons. Have you seen them on the internet? Friends have been tagging me in various examples for months, but I’ve been a little intimidated without a pattern. Happily, the little box-pleat pouches turned out to be pretty simple, and the whole apron is cute too. I hope she loves it!! 

What a full and beautiful week.

I could also have told you about checking on and feeding the honeybees, which was thrilling because we are now loaded with dripping rivers of golden honey. Or about how it took me the bulk of two days to get the house “clean” again after two weeks off or away. The floors alone. My gosh.

Or you might be interested in this new fitness routine I’ve been following all of July and how surprised I am to be loving it, despite the greatly reduced mileage. Certainly, a whole blog post could be about a stand up comic routine my sister Gen recommended, how it made me laugh and cry in the space of about 45 minutes. It left me reeling, truly. Please watch it.

And of course, always, the gardens here. How wild and full they are, and how the basil and tomatoes are taking over the world.

Later tonight, assuming we can stay awake past 8 pm, we might get dressed up and go to OKC to watch our friends perform at a Western saloon. I might wear my favorite embroidered boots and do some extremely terrible dancing. Good possibility of an outdoor movie night at the farm tomorrow, weather pending. And who knows what else might come up?

Trite as it may sound, I feel Love pressing in so closely that I feel safe walking around with my eyes wide open, breathing deeply. Like, not only is anything possible but truly everything is about to happen.

Thank you for stopping in. I wish you the very best weekend!! Carpe those diems, ok?

“You learn from the part of the story you focus on.
I need to tell my story properly. “
~Hannah Gadsby, Nanette
XOXOXOXO

 

 

 

thoughts on filling a god-sized vacancy

God-sized vacancies.

In recent months some trusted and deeply loving friends have helped us come to grips with features of addiction, and the simplest and best message from all this has been the idea that every human is born with a God-sized vacancy. We each have a space within us that only our Creator can fit, satisfy, and make whole. 

Until we understand that, we all stumble about, trying a million different things to fill the void. We ache to not ache anymore, so we seek after things that will hopefully numb the pain, things like unnecessary food and alcohol, needless shopping, miles and miles of running, drugs, sex, and more. Everyone has something which can be taken to excess. It’s never better than a temporary pleasure, like drinking salt water to quench a very unique and specific thirst. Often it becomes a truly destructive force.  

The more this idea comes into focus, the more it helps me, both in private ways and as I think about and pray for my family. It’s become a touchstone for considering daily choices and evolving priorities:

  • Do I crave this (whatever) because I am aching for God in some secret way, and I need to tend that first? Is this pursuit a poor substitute for the Real Thing?
  • Or do I genuinely feel close to Him, and this craving compliments my spiritual walk?
an expanse of mountains draws out my thoughts and feelings the same way a starry night can

The notion of a God-sized vacancy has recently ignited an exciting new way to pray for loved ones who are suffering. A way of praying in order to close the gap which has been unapproachable to me.  

Find her and meet her needs in a mysterious and surprising way, just as you found me. Speak to her in the voice only she will recognize, just as you did with me years ago and still do now. 

It has been transformative, as simple as the idea is. 

Here’s a relevant passage from the Jesus Calling undated daily devotional:

Seek My Face, and you will find all that you have longed for. The deepest yearnings of your heart are for intimacy with Me. I know because I designed you to desire Me.

We are designed this way. It’s not a deficiency. It unites us all, you know?

I love these short verses in Psalms 42…

As a hart panteth after the water brook, so panteth my soul after thee, O God. My soul thirsteth for God, for the living God: when shall I come and appear before God?

No earthly thing, no pleasure or possession or goal or anything, no matter how good and beautiful, can satisfy that deep, innate part of us meant only for Him. This isn’t terrifying to me; it’s deeply calming, comforting.

So this is all just some food for thought if you sense any reflexiveness or false satisfaction in your heart. If you have a hunger that is not satisfied by normal earthly things. And maybe especially if you love and pray for someone who is struggling with addiction or a lost feeling, a pain that nothing in your control will assuage. 

“Two powerful words that will instantly change your life…
I CHOOSE.”
~Carolee Waddoups
XOXOXOXO

 

life after travel, garden thrills, & loving staycation

Home sweet home. After a week away, we are back at the farm and loving every minute of it, soaking up every detail. In fact, our front-gate landing in the wee hours of Saturday morning segued neatly into a week of stay-cation, a July tradition to celebrate our wedding anniversary. 

Seventeen years!

It’s good and healthy to be away, to break from routine and explore a new part of the world. Last week we had the opportunity to see Virginia for the first time, in large part to join my family for a really special family event. (More on that soon!)

Mom and Dad with our entire family, missing only three of the grand kids. Baby Connor was asleep and my two girls were back in Oklahoma.
group candids are hard

Then it’s so refreshing to get back and return to normalcy. Home comforts. Farm chores. Oklahoma heat and humidity, even. All of it. Mostly home-brewed coffee, you know? I mean I’m grateful for restaurants and coffee shops, but…

Nothing compares to waking up at 5 a.m. to walk around in a tee shirt and day-old makeup with the day’s first perfect cup of coffee. Surveying the gardens at daybreak, with that first hot drink, it’s my favorite. 

The relief of being home rarely has anything to do with being desperate to end the travel we have just enjoyed. In fact, sometimes the more beautiful the trip, the more fervently we dive back into real life. We are recharged, deeply nourished, and ready for more living.

I ought to write more about what specifically we glean from each trip we take. New Orleans, for example, is a vastly different experience form Virginia Beach, and so the bring-home wisdom and inspiration are totally different. I love it all. 

The beauty of travel is that each destination offers something uniquely enriching, something that stays with you long after you return. Hawaii, for instance, offers a refreshing blend of tropical landscapes, rich culture, and adventure that can’t be replicated anywhere else.

When you’re surrounded by such beauty, it’s impossible not to feel deeply nourished and energized. Whether you’re exploring the hidden beaches or learning about the local traditions, the island is an endless source of inspiration. And of course, the mopeds are fun, offering a perfect way to breeze through the charming streets and enjoy the full experience of the island at your own pace.

Every trip, from the peaceful mornings on a Hawaiian beach to the lively nights in Waikiki, teaches us something new. It reminds us to slow down, take in the world around us, and find joy in the simple things.

A key part of truly embracing this way of travel is finding the right means to explore. That’s where this rental service becomes essential, offering an easy and effortless way to glide through the island’s most scenic routes. With a scooter, you’re not just getting from one attraction to another—you’re experiencing Hawaii in a way that immerses you fully in the moment.

There’s an unmatched freedom in pulling over on a whim to watch the sunset from a secluded beach or stumbling upon a hidden roadside café where locals gather. The journey itself becomes as enriching as the destination, turning an ordinary trip into a collection of unforgettable experiences.

The contrast between the serenity of the ocean and the vibrant energy of local markets is something I carry with me long after the trip ends. There’s a special kind of freedom that comes with exploring such a beautiful place, and it’s something I try to remember when life’s daily routines start to take over. 

sunrise on a Virginia beach
“Let’s go hiking. Can we hike? Le’ts go THERE.”
Jamestown settlement! We actually made it!

sunset on the way home

This recent homecoming gifted us with everything we needed. Lots of rest, plenty of Klaus cuddles, some time outside, some time with movies and popcorn. Romance. It is our anniversary, after all. We have enjoyed a few days of slow-paced home-bodiness, having left only for groceries and one dinner out with friends. And I think I have run at nearby paths three times.

Everything has exploded with life and color, texture, fragrance, and pollinators. The growing things are all so big and thick. Lush, although I use that word too often. We walk from the house to any flower or vegetable bed nearby and share the pathway with bees, wasps, butterflies, dragonflies, and bumbles. So far not one sting. Just lots of fly-bys. Yesterday I mixed up some simple syrup with essential oils to offer the bees. Such a thrill to peek inside the hives and see what progress they have made since spring.

One raised bed is filled to the brim with tomato vines. Jungly, unkempt, wild in the best ways. And not a problematic bug in sight. The vines are so thick and fuzzy that a smattering of marigolds and basil plants are barely seeing enough sunshine to grow properly. Ha! But they are trying.

Every morning since we arrived home I collect more green or pink tomatoes, all shapes and sizes, absolutely ugly-beautiful. Some are pale purple, which is cool. Heirlooms. And they ripen more quickly than I expected. The photo below was snapped on Sunday morning, and by Monday afternoon they were all ruby red. 

And delicious, I don’t mind telling you. Raw, just salted, is divine. I can’t wait for pasta night to make my own marinara. Maybe a sun-dried version too, soon? And tomato-watermelon salsa? Yes. A tomato tart!!

Quick tomato tip: This afternoon I accidentally broke off a good, healthy branch from one gigantic plant, but instead of tossing it to the compost I just stripped the lowest suckers and dunked the whole thing into a tall, strong jar of water.  In a few days, it should have sprouted hairy little side roots and be well on its way to a autonomy. Ready for soil. 

bumblebee on a zinnia in the Blue Bike garden xoxo
I’m obsessed with voluptuous hyacinth bean vines, and this one growing up and over the French Quarter trike is my fave. It is kind of a centerpiece for the shade garden, at least to me.

Basil plants elsewhere on the farm, the ones not choked out by tomatoes, are lush. (So sorry, it really is the perfect word.) I have lots of pesto recipes in mind for the rest of the month. Come over for dinner if you groove the spicy green goodness.

Tonight we get to see more friends for a few hours. The husbands are installing a much-anticipated Corvette engine. We plan to get some local Mexican food, which is great because last week I suffered some pretty outstanding food poisoning from a subpar taco salad out east. I cannot wait to have girl time with Kellie, too. She dives deep in conversation, and that’s one of many things I adore that about her.

Life is really beautiful right now, even with the unknowns, the lingering petitions. I am keenly aware of how drenched in blessings I am. So happy about our trip and even happier to be home, exactly where we are. 

More soon, I hope you’ll check in!

And feel free to send me alternates for the word lush so that I might describe my gardens with more variety. 

“Mid pleasures and palaces though we may roam,
be it ever so humble, 
there’s no place like home.”
~John Howard Payne
XOXOXOXO