1000Gifts | Lazy W Marie

encouragement & garden updates

September 21, 2014

Oh you guys. Lately when I sit down at my keyboard to tell you farm stories and share my heart, I freeze up.

As much as I love allowing words and emotions to flow, right now our biggest life headlines are intensely personal. They are too private for this blog and also not entirely my story to tell. Our family has been enduring big changes for several years but in particular this past year. And even more recently than that, this past month has brought change and revelation which I have felt coming for a long time but which are still new and huge, much more for our loved ones than us.

(Sometimes I have to remember that I haven’t shared that stuff with you guys, so how would you know what the heck I’m talking about or why I’m always asking for prayer? Maybe sometime in the future I will share more of it. Now is just not the time.)

My little red tea roses are slowly fading, but I'm not deadheading them yet. I want to leave the spent blooms as well as the rose hips on the plants to send energy back to the roots for winter. Plus they're still so beautiful! — My pretty little red tea roses are slowly fading, but I’m not deadheading them yet. I want to leave the spent blooms as well as the rose hips on the plants to send energy back to the roots for winter.

Still I am trying daily to sort through my thoughts and experiences and find something useful to share with you. I also hope you’ll have something magical to say in response. Here is what’s on my heart today.

Often the things for which we hope and pray come in God’s time, not ours. And while the seasons may change gradually, doesn’t it seem like both tragedies and miracles come suddenly? That’s certainly been our experience. And it’s also been our experience that tragedies and miracles are closely intertwined. Some people call them mixed blessings or silver linings. And these things ring true. But to me the bigger truth is that what blesses one person can sometimes cause great pain for another. Navigating this becomes a matter of adjusting our perspective and refining our focus on God’s will, not ours. We are tasked with seeking peace on every level, trusting Him, resisting fear and bitterness, feeding Love constantly. Refusing to ask those nagging questions that start with the words, “But what if…”

I'm learning a lot about composting methods and trying to implement a lot of it in my raised beds. How exciting to think of how much harvest we can enjoy by preparing the soil first! — I’m learning a lot about composting methods and trying to implement a lot of it in my raised beds. How exciting to think of how much harvest we can enjoy by preparing the soil first!

Right now lots of herbs and flowers are doing great on auto-pilot, but kale is the only thing I am actively growing. This week I'll be adding spinach, lettuce, and more to the fall veggie garden. — Right now lots of herbs and flowers are doing great on auto-pilot, but kale is the only thing I am actively growing. This week I’ll be adding spinach, lettuce, and more to the fall veggie garden.

So once again Handsome and I are right back to living one day at a time, often a few hours at a time, carefully watching and praying our way through one little situation after another. When I pause to see how we’re doing, I am happy. We’ve learned a lot through the ups and downs of the past five years, and we have been given millions of opportunities to prove what we’ve learned.

People keep telling me to stop growing morning glories. I can't! I won't. Morning glories are old fashioned, easy, and lush. They thrill and comfort me. — People keep telling me to stop growing morning glories. I can’t! I won’t. Morning glories are old fashioned, easy, and lush. They thrill and comfort me.

Are you in the midst of a season of change? Or are you waiting on a miracle or in need of refreshment? It is totally available.

Here is some encouragement for you:

When change seems to be the only constant, God is there to help absorb the shock and guide the way.
When we are broken hearted, God is there to mend us and comfort us.
When we feel alone, we are not because He is there. He is never the one who turns away.
When we feel powerless to help our loved ones in need, we are actually filled with power if we lean on God. His resources are unlimited.
When peace seems threatened, we can remind each other that we have a choice. We can choose peace and choose love and choose faith… even if we’ve failed before.
When things seem impossible, trust that your needs will be met. Just trust, ahead of proof.
Where you allow your thoughts to swim is hugely important. Be sure your imagination is alligned with your faith.

Here’s a bigger encouragement for you:

God always keeps His promises, so don’t worry if it’s taking a long time.
Just find ways to make your waiting season count for something.
He honors faith, especially the faith that is painfully wrought.
And He sees every tear and hears every single prayer.
If you look for Him you will find Him.
If you move closer to Him, He will move closer to you.

These are all facts, all indelible marks on my heart for which I am so grateful.

The Lazy W Honeymakers are still foraging daily, still drinking up the sugar water I provide them, still buzzing me in great gentle clouds when I walk int he garden. — The Lazy W Honeymakers are still foraging daily, still drinking up the sugar water I provide them, still buzzing me in great gentle clouds when I walk in the garden. So amazing.

I like to temper the big, heavy thinky stuff with daily pleasures like what’s going on in my garden. God has such a beautiful way of teaching us there, anyway. Life goes on. Cycles happen. Joy and hope are refreshed constantly. Facing the light is how we grow. Accepting deep nourishment carries us through the dry times.

There’s just so much.

Life here at the farm is good, friends. Really good. Not perfect, but overflowing with Love and faith, hope for unanswered prayers. We are strong and steady, trusting God to meet those needs we can’t meet ourselves. Handsome and I deeply appreciate your prayers, especially because you probably have no idea what we’re asking God to do.

But the beauty here is that we’re just asking Him to move. Just asking Him to have the final word in some painful situations, and whatever that is we know we will all be okay.

Tonight I am peaceful and happy. Overwhelmed by the possibility of a life fueled and controlled by Love.

How are you?

XOXOXOXO

a series of events

September 19, 2014

Happy Friday!
For Friday Five at the Farm this week,
A story in five parts.

1. I planned to run early this morning in the cooler temperatures, but we woke up to the most glorious sea of dense gray fog all over the farm. It was thick and cottony, wet on our skin. And visibility was maybe twenty feet, so I didn’t want to navigate the rocks and sandy back hills almost blind.

2. Instead of running early I spent some extra time with Chanta. While he munched sweet grain in the barn, I brushed him and untangled his mane. I stroked his legs and brushed him some more. We sang Beatles’ songs to each other and prayed for my girls together. By the end of his bowl of grain he was nearly asleep and I was sweaty and covered in his loose silvery blonde and golden brown hairs.

3. I did some other animal chores and planted a few more small plants then watered everything deeply, taking the opportunity to rinse off some of that horse hair. The herb garden is looking pretty good. It gradually changes shape and color toward the end of summer, and the newness seduces me. As I watered plants there, the sun rose to about halfway past dawn and started to scrub out the fog. So gorgeous. Handsome was home working on his ’68 Camaro which he recently painted satin black. Quite a sight.

4. So then I went for that run I was craving. I was already wearing my trusty running shoes, although they were soaking wet now and covered with not just horse hair but also chicken poop and hay. I found a water bottle, iPod, and earbuds and walked to the back field to start finding my rhythm.

5. At mile 3 1/2 I saw Geoffrey (our playful gray and white barn cat) stalking something in a big burn pile behind the pond. He’d followed me out there but is so easily distracted. His twitching tail had caught the attention of Meh, the baby llama, who was sneaking up on Geoffrey while he sneaked up in whatever was hiding in the burn pile. I laughed, finished my miles, and walked uphill in my squishy, filthy Brooks running shoes to eat breakfast.

The End.
Happy Friday!!

the following photo is unrelated to the story but you might like it anyway…

almost wordless wednesday, OSU-OKC campus garden photos

September 10, 2014

Tuesday morning I arrived for Master Gardener class early enough to stroll through the campus teaching gardens for about twenty minutes. I took lots of photos and just luxuriated in the atmosphere. Right there at northwest tenth and Portland, in the middle of rush hour traffic, near the highway and everything, the campus garden at OSU-OKC is brilliant and accomplished, a cultivated bubble of art, peace, and beauty. What struck me, in addition to the health and vibrancy of each individual plant, was the overall composition of the garden. Curves in just the right places, color, texture, rhythm, even surprises. This small series of plots and walkways, raised beds and borders, has it all. See for yourself.

OSU OKC teaching garden — I love the clean edge of this curved path and how packed the border is. Packed but not crowded. Lush and rhythmic.

OSU OKC teaching gardening — I fell in love with this plant after seeing it in New Orleans years ago. Gardeners there drape angel trumpets with white twinkle lights all year long! Not just at Christmas! Rumor has it that my class mentor Schroeder Wilson brings starts of this plant (just bare sticks) to the students every year. I’m basically counting on it now. My white twinkle lights are ready and waiting.

Friends, I saved my favorite photo for the last.

So there’s a quick little garden tour for you this Wednesday. It’s about as wordless as I can be. Hope you enjoyed it.

I’ll be sharing more and more about the Master gardener classes as the weeks progress. Just two sessions under my belt and I am learning a holy metric ton. And there’s so much happening at the farm right now! Lots of gratitude floating around, lots of energy being drained and replenished day after day. Thank you for all the kind words on my daughter’s birthday!

Happy gardening, friends! Happy everything.

A garden reminds us the value of intention-
plan, prepare, nurture…
A garden lets us work the soil,
teaching us everything is interrelated and interdependent.
Why not enjoy the company?
~Jean Larson
XOXOXOXO

p.s. I have been invited to be a guest on a podcast all about nature and simple living, I am so excited! Stay tuned for that.

nineteen wishes

September 8, 2014

For my daughter, my first baby full of love and strength and light, on your nineteenth birthday, I wish you so much happiness. I wish you happiness in every form it can possibly take, from the physical to the spiritual, both fleeting and eternal. Here are nineteen wishes for you from your momma.

I wish you health and vitality, physical stamina and comfort
that carry you through any activity you choose.
(Thank you so much for inspiring me to run.)

I wish you a strong, healthy back and relief from allergies.

I wish you the confidence that comes from sensing your own magnetic beauty
without needing to diminish another’s. (You are so beautiful in every way.)

I wish you success in a million endeavors.
That you can earn all the money you want,
pursue any goal that crosses your fertile imagination,
and enjoy that strong, buoyant feeling of independence.

I wish healing for your Dad and with him.

I wish you peace in every direction you look.
That no bridges are ever burned unless it’s for your own protection,
that you see Love mending things on your behalf.

That your boundaries in this world are ever widening and stimulate your potential.

I wish you a lifetime of horses and all kinds of animal relationships.
Maybe even a career in this field if it’s your desire.

I wish you a never ending supply of drawing paper and pencils and paints.
And soft paintbrushes.

I wish you music that soothes you, music that motivates you,
and music that lifts your spirits.

I wish you miracles when you need to see them most,
so that you always remember God is near you and loves you.
And that His power is very real and far beyond what any of us can do for you.

I wish you healthy friendships of every variety, for every occasion in this wonderful life.
Lifelong friends, purely fun friends, supportive friends,
even friends who challenge you and help you polish off your rough edges.

Mostly I wish you a deep and abiding friendship with your sister.

I hope you travel. I hope you find ways to see the world while you are young,
explore places that move you, and find that place that clicks with your soul.

I hope you learn to cook extravagantly and can always feed yourself well,
infusing this necessary daily ritual with your artistic nature.

And I hope you always read good books. Let them transport you.

I wish for you deep and galvanized family bonds with all of your family.
I hope you never feel alone, always feel like you belong and are loved unconditionally.

I wish for you an incredible romantic adventure. True love.
Comfort, safety, and thrills that can only come with that rare and lasting relationship.

And I hope that even when I slip and say something that reveals
how you will always be my tiny little doe-eyed baby, you still understand
I see what a beautiful young woman you have become.
That I see you now as both a baby and a woman
and I will always love you, no matter what.

These are more than birthday wishes; these are my prayers for you as you step into an exciting new life chapter. Never forget how loved you are.

XOXOXO
momma

miracles & mercies (psalm 136)

August 11, 2014

A week ago I was standing alone in the empty dining room of our church, trying not to think too hard about all the life changes going on around us, about all the turmoil that is far from healed in our family and in our church community. I started flipping through a Bible someone had left on one of the round tables there. My thumbs fanned the gold-trimmed tissue pages and stopped for no particular reason at Psalm 136. My eyes caught a few verses and then a few more, and the rhythm mesmerized me. For 26 focused verses the poet recites big, miraculous works of God and follows every single time with the phrase…

It was beautiful. All that power poured out, all that repetition. The phrase gradually gained volume in my head and thrummed up an energy I was not expecting in that quiet dining room. Some old Bible stories I knew, some I didn’t, they all swam around me. I couldn’t help but respond in my thoughts, “I know! He kind of did that for me too!”

He has, you know. God has been working miracles and shedding grace in my life for years, for over forty years now; but since I have really been paying attention, the miracles have been stunning.

I am still in need of miracles and mercy, as I suppose we all will be forever. I know that now and am no longer surprised by it. But what I also know is that gratitude and appreciation are so powerful. Gratitude and worship will literally transform our perspectives and often improve our actual circumstances.

“Keep looking up, not ahead.” Thanks for this reminder, Marci. xoxo

What kinds of miracles have I seen?

God saved my youngest baby from a sudden, terrifying, life threatening brain event when she was a toddler. He helped her recover far beyond the doctors’ expectations, needing zero therapies afterwards. Just a few days after emergency surgery she was feeding herself grapes and giggling while my baby sister painted her nails.

God protected her a year later for another brain surgery, healing her perfectly despite so many things I cannot and will not even name.

God protected my first baby throughout a perforated appendix ordeal. A misdiagnosis from the pediatrician, extreme dehydration and pain, failure of the hospital to administer antibiotics, and so many related problems. He healed her. He relieved her pain between doses of morphine exactly when we laid hands on her and asked Him to help in Jesus’ name. He calmed the war between the families in order to get us all through the ordeal. He even helped us create unlikely bonds.

God timed our move away from the City so perfectly. This property became available (and the previous owners were in such a hurry to move) the same week Handsome received a promotion and significant raise at work. Every piece fell into place beautifully, and our dreams started forming right before our eyes.

When the farm house caught on fire a year after we bought it, God preserved my life and all of our animals’. He made the rough path of recovery really smooth and filled with blessings. The work required of us during those months ended up serving as a siphon for all the stress and grief that would come from unfathomable life changes that year.

When we were heartbroken God sent us friends that were closer than brothers and sisters.

When Handsome and I have been at odds with each other, God sometimes made us laugh and sometimes made us hurt so we turned toward one another again, standing together to face the world. Every time.

When we felt useless and irrelevant without our children, God gave us friends in need who accepted our love. He helped us feel that family glow in myriad ways and continued to spark our hope while soothing our nerves.

God gave Handsome a career that is more than a paycheck; it is an opportunity to do good in the world and make a difference.

They go on and on and on. Did we deserve even one of these blessings? No, far from it. Even the job-related blessings, the things for which we “work” are still expressions of abundant Love, forgiveness, grace, help at every turn. The miracles happen every year, every month, every single day. Constantly I see God’s hand at work in my life. He feeds me everything I need to be sustained both physically and spiritually. It’s overwhelming how much has happened in a strange, beautiful kind of way, thrilling outcomes that by every right should have been disasters.

What miracles have you seen in your life? What overwhelms your heart with gratitude and reminds you that God is in control of everything, no matter how dark it seems? Who in your life gently urges you to look up at the source of help instead of ahead to the next battle?

Thanks for joining me again, friends. I hope you are uplifted and encouraged. That you find a million reasons to say thank you. I hope that whatever you are facing can be surrendered in prayer. One day it all could become stories you tell about miracles and mercy.

O give thanks unto the Lord; for he is good:
for his mercy endureth forever.
XOXOXOXO

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