Lazy W Marie

Carpeing all the diems in semi-rural Oklahoma...xoxo

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whistling past the graveyard (book review)

Friends, I have been wanting to tell you about this book for several weeks but just keep putting it off because the story washed over me in such a wonderful way that I didn’t want to rush through my review of it. Whew! I barely feel like I can relay to you how beautiful and impactful it is. I really want you to read it, ok? And I really think you should have your kids read it, depending on their ages. Encourage your family and friends to read it. Suggest it to the educators in your life. Make sure you purchase a copy; don’t just borrow one. You’ll want this around for years to come, and I bet you’ll have the urge to lovingly mark it up, too.

Okay. Let’s begin.

The book that has me so riled up is Whistling Past the Graveyard by Susan Crandall. 

WPTG book cover goodreads

Our famous little Oklahoma book club devoured and discussed this way back in March. We met here at the farm late that month and had a fun evening together eating great food, loving on each other, and talking over what we all agreed is destined to become a modern American classic.

The buffet table just before we started loading it with edible treasures.
The buffet table just before we started loading it with edible treasures.
My first plate heavy with said edible treasures. We earn our moniker rightly.
My first plate heavy with said edible treasures. We earn our moniker rightly.
My smart, hilarious, beautiful, long time friend Steph and me. You may recall Steph is our token non-reader, but she has been reading! The world is off its axis!
My smart, hilarious, beautiful, long time friend Steph and me. You may recall Steph is our token non-reader, but she has actually been reading! The world is off its axis!
Melissa with Fancy Louise the chicken and Chanta the horse, who was really greedy for her affection that night. So fun!
Melissa with Fancy Louise the cuddly hen and Chanta the cuddly horse, who was really greedy for Melissa’s affection that night. So fun!

Dinner Club With a Reading Problem always has a memorable time together. Y’all know that by now. But this book, assigned to the group by Seri after she randomly spotted it one day at Target, really got our attention.

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The story is set in 1963 in the Deep South. It follows a precocious, not always pleasant, but in the end very lovable little girl and the adults closely attached to her life. Together they experience normal childhood stuff plus one grand (and sad) adventure as well as fascinating cultural scenes from that region at that time and the racially charged tension that often occupied it.

Whistling Past the Graveyard holds its own with books like The Help and To Kill a Mockingbird, both of which our book club has read and discussed. We have also read Seven Days in May by beloved Oklahoma author Jen Luitweiler, another bit of historical fiction about social turbulence, racially charged issues, cultural differences, and the like. So it’s fair to say we have a good base for tackling these themes. This newest title not only added to our repertoire; it also deepened our conversations. A lot. Something about the characters Crandall wrote and the way they are all a mix of good and bad, whether black or white or rich or poor, something about that peeled away even more layers. Our discussion that night was fascinating and too short. We all thought this book warranted more talk time.

wptg quote art

For all the painful, universal broad strokes in a story like this, there is also a deep ocean of personal love for the reader to swim in. Personal stories are where the big stories really happen anyway, right? These pages are loaded with believable moments when you feel like you are right there in the characters’ faces. Lots of tangible affection and terribly acute heartache, too. I could share beautiful quotes like this from throughout the book, but I just really want you to read it for yourself. I will personally be enjoying it again and again, just like Grapes of Wrath. It has a classic, better-every-time-you-read-it sort of magic. Flipping through my dog-eared pages I already miss the fabric of the story, its thick, soft, patchwork-quilt quality, the very real characters and emotion Crandall conjured up. The spiritual lessons. Everything! Just wonderful, nourishing, entertaining stuff from the very first page to the last.

By the way, this book is a mere 308 pages, and the story moves fluidly. Smoothly. You should be able to tuck it in between more laborious titles with ease, and I suspect it will refresh you deeply. Spoiler Alert: You will probably cry at some point, but don’t give up and stop reading. Promise me you will finish to the end.

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Okay, that’s it for now! Have you read Whistling Past the Graveyard? If so, what did you think? If not, are you now tempted to grab it and gobble it up this weekend? Tell me everything.

“Sometimes laughin’ is all a body can do, child.
It’s laugh or lose your mind.”
~Susan Crandall Whistling Past the Graveyard
XOXOXOXO

 

 

 

 

 

peace returned, power never diminished

I woke up in the middle of the night shaken from a series of difficult dreams and instantly aware of some real life problems weighing heavily on my heart and mind. I was almost panting from the sudden onslaught, my eyes torn open, my stomach queasy, and every muscle in my body tense. Rather than lay there wrestling myself back into sleep and trying once more to sort out my thoughts (focusing on my worries lately seems to strengthen them), I stood up. Slipped out of our spacious upstairs bedroom with some comfortable clothes and my rolled up purple yoga mat. Tiptoed downstairs, got dressed and gathered my hair into a loose bun, and began. For half an hour I enjoyed stretching, breathing, twisting, holding, stretching and breathing more, and gradually returning my thoughts and facial expression to a place of peace and calm. My forehead and jaw relaxed. My smile felt easy again. My shoulders could drop back. And one by one, healthier, more life giving thoughts clicked back into position, simply and quietly, just as if they had been misplaced for a moment. An error easily corrected. Recoverable. Forgivable.

Almost four-thirty now. I feel like half of a new person. Hungry to keep this moment alive and this feeling going.

So I clicked on the coffee maker, snuggled Fast Woman and accepted her enthusiastic leg twirls, and took my favorite green notebook outside for a Senses Inventory. While the coffee brewed in the kitchen, I walked around taking stock of the midnight beauty outside in our south lawn. It was dark of course, but the longer I stayed (this time Geoffrey the gray and white barn cat was offering enthusiastic leg twirls), the more I could see. And the more deeply I breathed in the cool, clean air, the better I felt. It was magical.

The moon was particularly stunning. Not huge like it would have been on the horizon at dusk. No longer perfectly full or colored anything noteworthy according to the almanac. It was just so strong and heavy. Metallic. Constant. Suspended there above the south edge of our property, lending glimmering edges to everything around me, the very same moon we all have been watching for eons. And I couldn’t get enough.

I eventually finished my Senses Inventory, sat down, and put my notebook next to me on the iron bench. Geoffrey sprang up into my lap, purring, his fluffy tail swishing against my face. I felt like myself again, strong against the worries and difficult dreams that woke me an hour ago. Resilient against circumstances and people beyond my control. I felt very much at peace with and in control of my own small but expanding universe, which is my heart.

 

from Everyday Tao: Living With Balance and Harmony
from Everyday Tao: Living With Balance and Harmony

They say that these couple of hours between midnight and dawn are sacred. That this quiet time when the earth is asleep and gathering her energy again for the new day, that this is when we can tap into something rare and powerful, a meditative time of day when our hearts and minds are more susceptible to change and inspiration. Renewal. Communication with Love.

I experienced that again early this morning. The longer I sat there in the moon shadows the more firmly rooted I felt in my heart. Buoyant, light, and strong. Freed from anger and bitterness in a way that articulated for me what was wrong in the first place. Answers actually came.

Love always welcomes us back. A return to peace is always possible. For this I am so grateful.

Love is All You Need
XOXOXOXO

inspired saturday reading links

What a great month of reading it has been, friends. My ribs and belly and arms and legs are filled from the bone to the skin with really nourishing articles, books, and blog posts by some of my favorite writers. I am so grateful for the people who are disciplined enough to act on their inspiration. This weekend in particular I cannot put down The Girl on the Train, our current book club assignment, and am flirting with Unmasked, the memoir of Kane Hodder, who you may know as the horror actor and stunt man from Friday the Thirteenth and much more. Great combination, eh? You gotta shake things up.

But all of that is for discussing later. Today, it’s just an easy breezy Saturday, and I have collected for you some online stuff. It’s all totally worth installing in your already flourishing and sexy brain.

But first, a photo of our middle yard, between the bonfire pit and the veggie garden, as you look downhill toward the pond. See how wet and glossy everything is? I just love it. I love it so much, especially in the bright, slanting, early evening sun. Dazzling. Oklahoma is on the brink of a hot, rainless week, and we are trembling with happiness! Bring on the basil.

glossy grass hill to pond

Inspired Saturday Reading Links

This is Why You’re Here: The Psychology That Makes Very Big Things Possible Friends, I stumbled on this site by complete accident, a really happy accident as it turns out. Please give it some of your browse time soon. The global adventure these folks have sparked is amazing. This entry in particular should set your soul on fire. In a good way.

10 Ways Marathon Training Humbles Me  Women’s Running has tons of great articles every week, and several regular contributors are also bloggers I have been loving for a while. This particular segment is just great. I love it! The author expresses the running-life connection so well. Nails it. YES marathon training is deeply humbling. I mean humiliating. I mean humbling. Is that the same?

Advice From a Divorced Man After 16 Years of Marriage  Chances are you have already seen this article in circulation through your social media feeds. I’m sharing it again because I finally read it all and feel like every married person should heed this advice, not just the husbands. Ladies: You are equally culpable for the health of your marital union. Young girls: Romance and bliss are not the burden of only the boys.

20 Things Only Highly Creative People Would Understand My friend Meredith shared this, and I grooved it so hard! Check out #5. Remember how we’ve been talking so much about lunar cycles? Told you! So true.

Small Cool Spaces The Apartment Therapy website has been hosting a great series on smaller spaces made super cool, and I just cannot get enough. Click on the site, do the search, and enjoy. So inspiring! Even as much as I love wild abandon and decadence in my home, I also appreciate the discipline and restraint needed to make small spaces work really well.

21 Books From the Last 5 Years That Every Woman Should Read You know about our famous little Oklahoma book club, right? Pretty much the coolest baker’s dozen of literary ladies in all the land. We read so many wonderful books together, including one from this list! Many of us have independently read more of these. I humbly submit this entire list of interesting titles.

How to Calm Down, Naturally Do you ever browse Darling Magazine? It’s pretty scrumptious. Their tagline is “The Art of Being a Woman,” and the stuff they proffer is so elegant and smart, calming, feminine and strong and just… refreshing in a world of brashness and male-female competitiveness. (We should be complementing each other, not competing…xoxo) This article makes several suggestions for wellness and stress reduction, including yoga which is maybe my newest obsession. I know. I am about a decade behind the curve here.

the Darling mission statement...xoxo
the Darling mission statement…xoxo

Okay ladies and gentlemen, what are you reading this week? What is on your heart? What keeps you going day after day? I really love it when you tell me everything. Wishing you a fantastic weekend!!

“To live is the rarest thing
in the world.
Most people just exist.”
~Oscar Wilde
XOXOXOXO

raspberry-almond oatmeal bread

Greetings, friends! Greetings and salutations!

Today I have a fun bread recipe to share, something I baked up for my Dad last week that is worth repeating. At least to me. The jury is still out as to whether Dear Ol’ Dad deems it mouth-watering. But let’s dive in.

raspberry almond oat bread recipe label

As the title makes clear, this bread is not terribly plain; it boasts a lot of texture and variousness, which is so my groove. The raspberries bake up chewy and tart. The toasted almonds chunks (not slivers for a change) are so crunchy and satisfying. The oatmeal texture just makes you feel full and happy and alive. Win win win.

Let’s make this bread for the whole ingredients, the heart-healthy oats and the heavy texture. Let’s make it for the early summer colors and the aroma of it baking, for the way your serrated knife finally crunches through the golden, bumpy top then glides right down through the steaming middle, begging you for a pat of sweet cream butter. Or two. Plus some hot coffee in the middle of the afternoon.

Okay.

Ingredients:

2/3 cup packed brown sugar
3/4 cup milk
1/2 cup vegetable oil (Next time I’ll use either browned butter or applesauce. If you try either variation please let me know!)
2 large eggs
2 1/4 cups all-purpose flour
1 cup quick oats
3 teaspoons baking powder
dashes of salt and cinnamon
1 cup whole raw almonds (chopped rough then dry toasted)
1 cup whole raw raspberries (toss these in a speck of flour before adding to batter)

Method:

In a large bowl mix together the brown sugar, milk, oil (or variation of butter or applesauce) and eggs. You only need a wooden spoon for this.

Stir in the flour, quick oats, baking powder, salt, and cinnamon. Still just the humble wooden spoon.

Are your rough-chopped almonds already toasted and cooled? Yay! Go ahead and add those as well as the berries. Fold it all into a glorious kaleidoscope of favor and texture.

Pour this chunky, colorful batter into a standard bread pan which you have smeared with butter and dusted with flour and cinnamon. Bake the whole yummy she-bang for up to an hour at 375 degrees. Plan some fresh coffee for later and soften a little extra butter. You’ll need it soon.

Now I am craving this again! I only ate one skinny slice the day I baked this.
Not enough! : )

Dad, did you like this? I know it’s bit more like “granola” style than you usually groove. But don’t worry; we’ll get back to pure indulgence soon. I love you!

Friends, happy Tuesday! What is going on in your kitchen?

“Cooking is like love.
It should be entered into with abandon
or not at all.”
~Harriet Van Horn
XOXOXOXO

 

 

timeout warrants issued

What’s up, Kat? You totally made me cry into my perfect coffee with your post about a memorable lesson and a burnt headlight. Biggest hugs to you, sweet lady. That was beautiful. xoxo Friends, you must go read You Can Fix It. It’s short and so very sweet.

This week Kat wants to know what 10 things
(people, places, whatevv) need a timeout?
Here are my nominations:

  1. The rain. The rain has been a wonderful blessing and has busted all our historic droughts and given us such glorious spring gardens! It’s been magical. But we’re good now, thanks. Still flooded everywhere you look, Oklahoma now sees a nine-day forecast of nothing but more rain. Heavy rain. Storms like what you’d see in the tropics, not the southern Midwest. We are soaked to the bone. The rain needs a timeout.

    Verdant and colorful, yes! I just love it. But we crave more sunny days like in this photo. The plants crave the sun, too.
    Verdant and colorful, yes! I just love it. But we crave more sunny days like in this photo. The plants crave the sun, too.
  2. People who commit body shaming against others, including themselves. This includes people who call others “too fat” as well as people who call others “too skinny” or anything at all. This barely used to bother me, but for some reason lately all the careless adjectives and tones of voice flying around just create a really confusing, hurtful atmosphere. I don’t groove it. Body shamers need a timeout.
  3. Natasha the black barn cat. She has been bullying Fast Woman, who you may remember recently became an indoor cat (on a trial basis at least). Natasha spends lots of time lurking outside the doors and windows, howling and spiking her shoulder fur in Fast Woman’s general direction. It’s aggressive and it needs to stop. Natasha needs a timeout.

    They will stare at each other like this for a solid hour, hissing and thinking terrible things.
    They will stare at each other like this for a solid hour, hissing and thinking terrible things.
  4. People who freely post on social media graphic images of death and violence. Animal abuse, abortion, actual funeral caskets and headstones, and more. I don’t need shock value to help me calibrate my moral compass. Nor do intense visuals like this provide any kind of healing for very real grief. Some people seem to care more about making a splash or getting attention than about how they affect others when they propagate this gut wrenching stuff. They don’t realize that such images can trigger deep trauma and sadness, so they need a timeout.
  5. Chunk-Hi the buffalo for bullying the horses and sleeping on their hay. I mean, come on man. I see you. I know you know what you’re doing. Timeout for the buff.
  6. Liars, rumor spreaders, and gossips. It’s rampant lately, in both private and professional circles, and all of these folks need a timeout.
  7. The excessive alligator snapping turtles showing up on our roads and in our ponds. Nope! No thanks. Timeout.
  8. Spammers. Not necessarily the fine people who manufacture and distribute Spam, the canned meat product; that foodstuff has its place and I am sure those Spammers are great people! In fact I have kind of a heartwarming story about that kind of Spam if you want to hear it someday. But the trolls who work so tirelessly to poison our internet experience? Those spammers. They need a timeout.
  9. People who insist on putting frogs at or near my person, on or around my neck, chest, face, and head. Most of all my sweet, ornery husband. But also practically all the kids we know. And our friend Jeff. And my Dad. All people who think it’s funny to throw frogs at me or even fake like you are doing it, you need a timeout.

    Cute in a photo. Terrifying in 3-D.
    Cute in a photo. Terrifying in 3-D.
  10. The rain. I have to say it twice for emphasis. Take five, rain. Let’s meet up again in late July.

 

Whew! If these ten timeout warrants are actually satisfied, then so shall I be. Life would be ever so much lovelier.

Who or what do you think needs a timeout? Spill it.

XOXOXOXO