Archives for October 2015

happily anticipating holidays at the farm

October 29, 2015

Late October. Such an exciting time of transition. This is when everything really starts looking different in Oklahoma and when we officially trade our summertime pool parties for blanket-wrapped bonfires. This week marks the uphill climb to that first tall peak of the roller coaster known as The Holidays.

For hostesses, Halloween is the point of no return… Mwa-ha-ha…

I groove hostessing. Maybe you call it entertaining or simply having people over. I straight up love opening The Lazy W to friends and family, sometimes my husband’s professional colleagues, even strangers. We indulge in this pretty often and for a wide variety of reasons. In fact, if ever too much time seems to be passing between special occasions, you can bet that I am thinking up an excuse to invite people here. Lots of different personalities living and breathing in this house, all over the farm really, eating and laughing and infusing these walls with their Love and energy, it’s what keeps this place alive. Luckily Handsome is on board with my passion for people about 87% of the time. That other 13%? I can usually bridge that gap with something chocolate. Like this.

But with the holidays so close upon us, reasons and excuses to gather are about to be plentiful.

This weekend we will dress up in costumes and share sweet treats, maybe attend a few parties and then sleep one extra hour Sunday morning. Handsome will be Batman, of course, the best Batman in all the land. I will be at least four different characters to go alongside Batman, taking photos of him with random strangers. My costume criteria is always twofold: How much have I been running lately and not eating tortilla chips- can I pull this off? And also- will it leave me free to be Batman’s fans’ photographer? haha Yeah, we are definitely excited about Halloween this year!

Actually I am looking forward to all the holidays this year! The gathering spirit has got me tight in its happy grasp. To me, preparing the farm for people is all about this: Love. Why are we gathering, and how can I set the stage for Love to move freely between us? How can this event, whatever it is, meet needs and make memories for everyone? So the details of that are pretty simple: atmosphere, food, and comfort.

ATMOSPHERE, LIKE NATURAL BLOOMS & PAPER DECOR: I love wild color around the house all year long, and when given a choice I will go for natural decor like real trees and indoor plants and flowers. So for the wintertime holidays that means forcing bulbs, for one thing. This year, in addition to paper whites and amaryllis I will force some more colorful stuff, and it’s very exciting! At the Master Gardeners meeting next week, they are selling flower bulbs to members only and I cannot wait to see what they offer. Bring on the tulips and hyacinths!! The cozier months mean lots of yarn and tissue paper crafts, too. These are soft and inviting in any room, plus they are a relaxing way to keep my hands busy during movie marathons.

ALSO, LIGHTS: I love having twinkle lights strung all through the house, around the nearby yards, in trees, over our deck, around mirrors, wherever I can find an electrical outlet nearby. Handsome, though he chagrins wasted electricity, understands my biological need for sparkle and one day brought home a giant box of energy-efficient lights. I think he got them on clearance after Christmas last year, and now we are both happy, haha. : )

THEMES Some of the themed parties we threw this past year were Oscars Night, Pizza and Board Games, Car Show Pinup (that was my husband’s surprise 40th birthday), and Fiesta. Each of these was a fully developed, top to bottom, inside and out themed party that just made us so happy. I love starting with the invitation and carrying the idea through food and drink, music, decorations, and activities. For the wintertime holidays, we will likely go for a cookie exchange, a a chili cook off, some Dirty Santa fun, and more.

party posts car show — My handsome guy surrounded by some of our friends at his surprise 40th birthday Pinup Car Show party. THAT was memorable! xoxo

party post oscars joe — Our friend Joe filling out his ballot at last year’s Oscars party. Fun!

In addition to themes for gathering, I will be drumming up care package themes for our oldest daughter. She is living on her own out of state for the first time, and I want her winter to be as cozy and happy as possible. (Send me your ideas!)

FOOD Ahh, wintertime diet, you are so good and so bad. I foresee lots of baking. Lots of biscotti, lots of homemade chicken pot pie and chicken and dumplins, a pot of red beans and rice here and there, so much bone-warming food. We can totally throw homemade pizza parties in wintertime,too! Thank goodness for my new treadmill.

party post pizza jason — Our friend Jason crafting his pizza masterpiece. We had an exciting tornado that night and ended the evening playing Cards Against Humanity. My gosh. FUN.

SNOW, maybe ICE All the almanac-type signs point to a snowier than usual winter in Oklahoma this year, so I am looking forward to lots of snowman building, snow angel making, snow ice cream, bonfires, fireplace chats, you name it. Snow is gonna be a fun excuse to cozy up and talk closely with people we love. And our buffalo told me he is ready.

SPEAKING OF PEOPLE Who to invite, and how to get them here? We are super blessed to move in several interesting circles of friends. Sometimes these circles overlap naturally, and sometimes we cause them to overlap, and this is always fun and interesting. We have some wonderful, beloved local family, too, so gathering people at the farm is pretty easy. Usually it’s just a matter of how to spread the word? Until now I have always just texted folks or mocked up a silly Facebook event page.

But recently I discovered Paperless Post and cannot wait to dive in! I am such a sucker for themed-out events, and this just looks so fun. They offer a huge variety of styles and prices; in fact browse just the free stuff and you’ll be blown away by the selection. It’s actually dangerous for a person like me, who is always looking for an excuse to gather her people together, because just seeing a pretty invite sparks ideas for new events. haha I mean click on this one, for example. Hilarious! Check out all of their creative invitations right here. I literally explored for half an hour. SO much fun!

Paperless Post can print your holiday cards, too, and I think I’ll try that this year. Nobody warn my husband, but I think we will have our portrait made soon. We will wear matching khakis and white shirts and big red holiday bows on our necks, and our new puppy will be stage center. Obviously. Or no, scratch that. We will wear acid washed denim and carry bow-staffs. Yes.

Anyway, three cheers for gathering your people! One big extra loud cheer for the holidays and all the Love they bring us. Check out Paperless Post, friends, and let me know which ones you like. I am signing off now to see if any of my Halloween costumes fit.

“Hospitality is present when something happens for you.
It is absent when something happens to you.
Those two simple prepositions – for and to – express it all.”
~Danny Meyer
XOXOXOXO

super moon reflections, a month later

October 27, 2015

One Month Ago:

At 5:20 Monday morning, our south lawn was draped in stark moon shadows. Long, dramatic, angular ghosts in black and silver, jutting out to the east of every outbuilding, every oak tree, even the slender zinnias. The sight was truly stunning. I had never seen the farm so zig-zagged by shadow and light. The full moon was still lit fiercely, almost too bright to gaze at directly, and now perched high in the satiny black heavens, no longer eclipsed. I don’t remember even a stitch of a breeze that Monday morning. All the animals were asleep except the barn cats and Klaus. He was bounding around in the moonlight, swirling our ankles and celebrating a new day. A new moon phase, too, though he didn’t know it.

(photo credit to my friend Christina Kamp)

A Few Hours Earlier:

Sunday night before, just as the swollen moon was growing that bloody rust around her edges and the eclipse was beginning, Handsome and I sat with Klaus in the barnyard, the one where we sometimes have outdoor movie nights with friends. We were in plastic Adirondack chairs facing east, toward the Talking Tree. The sky was black and breezy.

That night I had collapsed desperately into moon gazing, feeling more physically and emotionally drained than I had in months. So much of that previous week was spent shredded and crying, angry, deeply examining and weighing everything in my life (big stuff, friends, not what color to paint my kitchen). I watched the sky and measured my internal reactions, actively hoping that the full moon would bring the end of some unwelcome intensity. Breathed deeply.

(photo credit to our friend James Menzies)

The eclipse was amazing, of course. We sat in that barnyard and watched for a long time, trading cuddles with Klaus and holding hands more cautiously than normal. We saw a shooting star at the same moment and both made wishes. Probably breaking good-luck protocol, Handsome asked me what my wish was. “For everything to return to normal,” I answered honestly. This stung him, he said, because he thought everything was normal. And wonderful. I pulled my frayed orange blanket more tightly around my arms and flinched at a sticker that had found my ankle.

For all its beauty and intensity, that previous lunar cycle was rough. It coincided with my own personal lunar cycle, and the combination was almost too much. As life goes, this cosmic intersection happened alongside some unrelated (or maybe definitely related?) life events, external stressors that became much harder to cope with under these circumstances. My energy was both drained and exploding, which is bizarre, and everything was white hot, sharp, and painfully intense. Just like the full moon in those pre-dawn moments on Monday. The heated edge cast scary shadows on every part of my life.

Today:

That was a month ago. Our Super Moon. The Blood Moon that captured everyone’s attention in so many ways. That Monday morning in September, drained of all its color and gleaming fiercely, the moon got my heart and mind all churned up. And the difficulty continued for a few more weeks.

This morning in October, as we watched the moon rise full and bright again, everything is softer, gentler. The weather is cooler but not yet cold. Our windows are open and so is my heart again, finally. My thoughts and emotions are settled now and I feel stronger with this new perspective. We are enjoying a rebuilding in this house, and it feels pretty wonderful. I got my shooting-star wish that things would return to normal, except that having walked with eyes open through that bizarre month, things are better than normal now. Deliberateness brings lots of added beauty, you know?

Did you experience anything like this leading up to the Super Blood Moon? Did you notice the crystal clear dark-before-dawn that first Monday morning after the eclipse? Had you been through an exceptionally potent week (or month) leading up to it?

Our bodies are comprised of so much water, after all. If the ocean can be pulled by the moon, why would we be exempt? I have tried to rebel against this for a long time, but finally the rhythm makes sense. Finally the purpose seems a little more clear, the swell and retreat of energy, all the variations in between. Now, as long we stay centered in Love and navigate the waters honestly, I feel safe riding the waves and plumbing the depths. Who once said that an unexamined life is not worth living?

And one last note: Other life issues aside, I personally believe the color of your kitchen is kind of a big deal. ; ) Choose wisely.

“Summer ends and autumn comes,
and he who would have it otherwise
would have high tide always and a full moon every night.”
~Hal Borland
XOXOXOXO

literary saturday: potpourri

October 24, 2015

Oh man, friends, we made it to Saturday! Oklahoma did not float away in the rain. We are not burning up under the sun. No winds are blowing down our roofs. Not yet, at least. Today is a serving up a pretty mild dose of autumn, and I like it.

I hope you and yours have a weekend of rest and recreation all cued up and ready to enjoy. Handsome and I certainly do. As we drink some perfect coffee and nibble on one or two things to wake ourselves up, let’s share what we’ve all been reading.

BOOKS:

My Life in France by Julia Child This is our current book club selection and it is delightful. Child describes Paris the way Hemingway did, and both remind me of my beloved New Orleans. Also, food! Her passion for food is so alive on every page. Really fun read. I will give you a full review soon.

Unmasked by Kane Hodder Handsome and I attended a costume/superhero/character event in Tulsa last spring and met this gentleman, the actor so many people know for his role as Jason Voorhees. Oh man, you guys. His memoir is a heart-breaker in the beginning. Reading it is really amping up the Halloween mood.

ONLINE:

Indoor Herb Gardens: It’s late October and lots of us are putting our summer gardens to bed. But this is prime time to think about herbs, especially with the biggest cooking holidays of the year right around the corner. Herbs make all of that stuff better. House Beautiful offers some wonderful indoor herb-growing inspiration. Of course, since you’re smart you’ll also contact your local County Extension and favorite Master Gardener for technical help. : )

Yummy Fall Recipe: I am way too obsessed with apple fritters, and this recipe by Not Without Salt (I am also obsessed with her) could be my final undoing in the diet department. Apple Cider Fritters With Cider Glaze. Bless her, by the way, for posting food that is not pumpkin-based.

Ann Voskamp offers A Brave Way to Heal Our Relationships: Often I cannot bring myself to read her words because they cut too deep, too close to the nerve. Then I get brave suddenly and read them and remember that yes, they cut, but with truth. And truth has a way of also healing. Good stuff right here, friends. Good stuff indeed. In this post Ann is talking about the commonality of brokenness, the importance of listening, of setting our children gently into an unknown, and also social media. She challenges us to think about building each other up with bricks, not throwing them. This was refreshing in the best ways.

joc horse colorado — This young lady is doing so great on her big Colorado adventure. She makes us incredibly proud, and seeing her happy makes me happy. But this whole situation sure keeps me praying hard. Trust and faith. Faith and trust.

Gratitude. We know it is so powerful. My friend Kim shared an article at Live Happy online magazine called 8 Easy Practices to Enhance Gratitude. The post is a year old, haha! But that’s fine because this advice is timeless. My favorite is #6: Fall Asleep to Gratitude. I have a worried version of insomnia pretty often, and lying in a quiet room saying nothing but thank you for one specific thing after another is the sweetest way to drift off. A nice extra is waking up feeling peaceful and content, full of heart. Counting blessings instead of sheep is great advice, and so is the rest of this list.

Risk of Moderation: Again I’m reading about food and health and how to navigate it all and still be happy. This post over at The Greatist revisits the idea of “all things in moderation.” The timing could not be better for me, as I have spent these last few weeks, actually the past couple of months, making one weekend full of excuses after another, indulging socially over and over again, until suddenly my loose jeans are a bit snug. (yikes) No matter how much running I have been doing, I have not been not losing weight. And now? The cruel joke is that running is difficult again, even right after doing pretty well at that race recently. Food matters, friends. So the white lie about moderation is a solid attention getter for yours truly.

Hospitality or Entertaining? Sandy the Reluctant Entertainer nails it again with this post. She shares memories of her mom and dad, considers the meanings and implications of the words we use to describe opening our homes, and asks where is our focus, self or others? I love this, as I love so many of her posts. Bless not impress. I just love it so much. Please dwell in these words before you get all stressed out about the holidays. Sandy’s voice is so soft and strong.

circa 1977, just because...xoxo — circa 1977, just because…xoxo

Okay, happy weekending to you!

“Never trust anyone who has not brought a book with them.”
~Lemony Snicket
XOXOXOXO

mud monsters & pain management

October 23, 2015

In barely any time at all the middle field was slicked down, shiny wet and marshy. I looked down and saw the shattered concrete growing moss right before my eyes, chartreuse and emerald blooms and billows exaggerated in a time lapse that stunned me into fresh tears. The Signature of All Things echoing echoing echoing.

Toward the willow tree rainwater ran downhill, washing away all the day’s good intentions but also a hefty measure of regret. Fair exchange.

Then the curtain of rain pulled away and revealed filmy, wavering images of my girls splashing in the mud and wearing both t-shirts and sundresses, galoshes and ball caps, my husband’s green soccer jersey from his own childhood. My little Mud Monsters, shrieking and giggling at the sky, braiding their skinny arms together, knowing their mother was watching but not knowing then that she’d never forget that moment. They clawed at the air with their pink and olive Mud Monster hands and bared their pearly white baby teeth and smiled at me then disappeared with that same wavering, filmy trick.

The wind was weirdly absent during this rain and I needed it to sweep my thoughts away. Desperately needed it to comb through my troubled brain. I craved a storm instead of such a terrible, gentle shower and walked to the barn hoping for some tin-roof white noise. It smelled like horses and hay and ozone. The cats twirled my blue jean-covered legs. One reluctant clap of thunder.

********************

Sometimes people tell us to count our blessings, it could always be worse. True enough. Other people say, pain is pain, no one has a right to measure one pain against another. Also true.

Sending lots of love to all my friends who are hurting tonight, for any reason. The sun will shine bright and true again, in its own time. Rain has its place. Let it fall. Let it nourish you.

XOXOXOXO

friday 5 at the farm: things I heard this week

October 17, 2015

It’s been quite a week here at the dirt-and-hooves W. Handsome has been nursing an injury and doing his Commish work from home. I have been trying to stay caught up on things while not neglecting him. The gardens are changing seasons. And the animals are really enjoying the glorious weather. For Friday 5 at the Farm, how about a handful of things I have heard this week?

Llama Sneeze: On Tuesday while distributing protein pellets to the buff (on top of his free-choice hay) I leaned in for some face snuggles with Meh and caught, instead, a tiny, squeaky little sneeze. Right in the general direction of my forehead. Have you ever heard a baby llama sneeze? It’s not awful. Plus, he has lately been instigating spitting fights with his far beefier pasture mate. More on that soon.
Parrot Playing Babysitter: Klaus is an enthusiastic romper of all farm-ily members, including Bobby Pacino the macaw, and sometimes our feathered boy has had just about enough, even from the safety of his outdoor cage. I was working in the nearby flower bed one morning and heard Pacino say firmly, definitely mimicking my own Mama voice, “No No! That’s a No No, okay?” The best part of this story is that the puppy obeyed the parrot. He sat demurely on the sidewalk and twisted his head and waited for further instruction. I went back to my garden tasks and left the parenting to the bird.
V-8 with Glass-packs: We are selling the Jeep (aka Shakira) and have bought a little mid-century beauty for me to drive. She has a nice, strong, smooth engine that growls a little. Also not awful.
Running Team W Expands: Around the time of my recent half marathon in Lawton, Handsome secretly ordered himself a pair of running shoes. This week they arrived in the mail. Then he got the green light from his doctor and told me he is ready to start running!! So hearing that fun news is just cool. Cool cool cool. So exciting! Now I am researching what races might offer discounts to married couples or people who practice anthropomorphism to a scary degree. Ideas?
Sirens but no Alarm: Oklahoma is hot and dry this week, unseasonably so for October, and we have been seeing lots of grass fires. So we hear lots of fire truck sirens. Not good. Thankfully, none of them have been driving to our farm. This is a big deal emotionally because it was during this season seven years ago that we had that really scary house fire. In years since our area has been scourged with wildfires, too. So stuff like this triggers me. I’m sorry for those folks dealing with damage and simultaneously very grateful it’s not us this time.

He is getting so big. All the animals are cautious of him now. He still romps like a baby though...xoxo — He is getting so big. All the animals are cautious of him now. He still romps like a baby though…xoxo

louise buffing — Handsome showed me the ropes of car sanding and buffing before he laid a clear coat on my cute little treasure.

Okay, there you have it. Five things I have heard that made this week special. What have you heard?

Carpe Diem!
XOXOXOXO

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Archives for October 2015

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