Lazy W Marie

Carpeing all the diems in semi-rural Oklahoma...xoxo

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I Love Having a Husband Who…

…is dressed up all handsome and sharp for church and still spontaneously walks through damp grass to check on my turtle, give him extra water, and pull his terrarium to the shade.

…is running a fever and battling a ferocious headache yet still musters the strength to work half a day chainsawing fallen trees, repairing buffalo fence, and patching a chicken coop after storms.

…would not hurt his Dad’s feelings for all the Baskin Robbins peanut-butter ice cream in the world.

…prizes truth over tradition and joy over drama.

…has a way of making every one of his employees feel like a valued team member… maximized, appreciated, supported, and propelled into more than any lesser leader would dare dream.

…brags openly about my home-cookin’ but when we are alone on the weekend begs me to get take out so I am not away from him for hours in the kitchen. He would rather cuddle when possible. Unless the menu is Alfredo pizza or fish tacos. The cuddlin’ can wait just a little while.

…can make me laugh so hard when I feel like crying.

…hates to read books but supports my feverish bibliophilia and also makes generous space in our life for Dinner Club With a Reading Problem.

…has little personal interest in small scale gardening (his family is more into farming) but will happily spend an entire weekend building me fences, raised beds, trellises, canopies, and anything else I am foolish enough to mention off-handedly.

…and can grow an indoor plant like nobody’s business.

…can shift smoothly from consummate professional to affectionate husband then to strong, capable animal tender and back to affectionate husband again. In a blink, no problem.

…collects childhood toys shamelessly.

…and also freely admits to having an insatiable appetite for buying and selling interesting cars.

…teaches our adult Sunday school class, infusing it with historical scope, reasonable thinking, and intelligence.

…begs me to write a book, just a fun story, so we can get rich and retire at the beach. The fact that he believes I can do it is terrifying but wonderful.

…claims to be an antisocial person but loves our friends as much as I do and is actually the life of every party we throw.

…happily encourages me to open the farm for visitors… for an hour, for a night, for a week.

…knows every bird at the Lazy W by name and personality.

…loves our baby llama just like a first time Daddy. She loves him back, too. This all breaks my heart in unexpected ways.

…looks at me in ways that make me want to protect him from the world then holds me in ways that make me know I am protected forever.

…is the smartest, most ambitious and capable man I have ever met or heard of.

…endures my petty female jealousies.

…then flirts deliciously with women but never makes me fear for his loyalty.

…and then endures my petty punishments.

…and is ferociously protective of me if he thinks I am being flirted with.

   Mostly I am just so thankful to have this man love me. The longer I know him, the more we experience together and learn, and the better I see him for who he is in the context of this complicated world… the more I am in awe. Whether we are facing tornadoes and hail or the equally destructive storms of life and relationships, I know I am safe with him. I know that together we can accomplish pretty much anything and enjoy pretty much all the world has to offer.

   I love you, sir. So much. You deserve the best and a million dreams come true. Happy Monday.

Always, Now, and Forever.
xoxoxoxo

Tiny Farm Update and a Book Review: Impatient With Desire

   Happy Wednesday to all! Today I have good stuff to share. Mostly, an excellent book recommendation. Scroll down for that. And? It occurred to me that in the midst of the tornado news I have been remiss in mentioning here on the blog some very, very happy news. How embarrassing! If you follow us on Facebook or Instagram then you already know that Handsome and I are enjoying the company of an adorable brand spankin’ new baby llama! Yep, Seraphine finally delivered her cria exactly thirteen days ago. The baby is a little girl and is healthy and happy, growing by the hour it seems. We have named her Dulcinea del Toboso, after Don Quixote’s fabled love interest and muse, but we affectionately call her Little Bit. I am pretty sure my husband has lost his big heart to this sweet little creature, and I am totally okay with that. You should see them play together.

She is the most precious thing that has ever walked on four llama hooves.

   Now… Another book review. I gobbled up this volume two weekends ago, right before the tornadoes, and really, really, really want you to read it. Really. Okay? Okay, here we go.

   First, just take a quick look-see at this cover art and make a mental note of what you think this book is about. Maybe go ahead and scribble your quickest impressions on a piece of scrap paper, also noting whether it is a book you would choose to read. Be honest.

Impatient With Desire by Gabrielle Burton, Published by Rare Bird Books

   What was your immediate reaction? I am so curious about this. Despite the fact that we all grew up hearing, “Never judge a book by its cover,” I pretty much judged this little book by its cover. Harshly. And I let it languish on my dusty shelves for over a year. Neglected, shunned, unread because I thought it was a Puritan romance or something. Not my groove, man.

   How wrong I was. Luckily one recent weekend I possessed the presence of mind to actually read the story description and was immediately hooked. I plunged right in on Saturday morning, consuming a third of the story before coming up for air. Then that Sunday night I woke suddenly at 2 am, eyes unable to even blink shut, and realized I was desperate to finish the book. I crept downstairs and did so, and now I have that settled, satisfied, wonderful feeling. I want you to have this feeling too.

   I want YOU to read THIS BOOK. It is so short and so well written that you can tackle it in one average airplane ride. Or two afternoons on a lounge chair. Or three sleepless night.

   What is it about, you ask? The Donner party. You know who I’m talking about. The band of American pioneers in the mid 1800’s who headed west toward California? The ones who got stuck in the snowy mountains? The group rumored to have survived by cannibalism???

   Now you’re with me.

   Yes, I do feel a little bad sensationalizing this book review, but the truth is that most people probably identify the Donner party with cannibalism. It’s just how our culture works. The delicious surprise here (sorry, couldn’t resist) is that Impatient With Desire serves up (I really can’t stop) a slow, tortuous, truly moving insight to the human experiences of starvation, isolation, hope, fear, faith, commitment, survival, and, of course, death. It really is the Donner party story like you have never heard it. Not even the History channel on its best, most creative day can grip your heart like Burton has done with this artistic and believable story.

   Burton writes in a journal format, in the voice of one woman exclusively, Mrs. Tamsen Donner. The leader’s wife. Scrap all preconceived notions you might already have about this woman and prepare yourself to want to know more about her than one book can offer. It is so good. Also, just accept that all conversations you have so far had regarding cannibalism and your personal tipping points, morality, situational ethics, etc, etc… are tainted by lofty ideas and a cruel disconnect from the realities of hunger that abject.

   Then read this book.
   And discuss it all over again with smart people who have also read it.

“I used to argue that we can improve on nature, 
or at least not be as brutal as nature. 
I don’t have the luxury of theoretical debates anymore, 
nor am I as sentimental as I once was.” 
~Tamsen Donner, letter to her sister. 

   Much worse than judging books by their covers is the crime of judging people who have faced things we have never even imagined.

   Aside from the obvious themes, something lovely ran through the book consistently and caught my attention. It was Mrs. Donner’s mantra that, “We all came here strangers to ourselves.” Tamsen Donner said this repeatedly, her own understanding deepening each time, and it made more and more sense to me too. How often do we learn about our own hearts through trials? How true is it that while living life we learn about ourselves as much as or maybe more than we learn about the world?

   Many other, skinnier threads are up for grabs, too. Skinny threads, but not delicate. This book is short but packed with life.

  • Patriotism and adventure…
  • Early American feminism (the Donner marriage was fascinating)…
  • The concept that a family is raised by community and not one parent… 
  • How do we view animals? Pets, workers, food… And how do we honor them? 
  • The importance of contemporaneous journalling… (I plan to blog about this very thing soon. It’s cropping up everywhere I look!)
  • How dangerously and wonderfully our moods can affect each other, especially in relationships like marriage and especially in close physical quarters…
  • Regret, purpose, hindsight, the limited power of our own lessons learned to help others…
  • The intrinsic value of physical labor…
  • Also the intrinsic value of routine, schedules, and structure to combat mental fatigue…
  • Life cycles and poetry…
  • Religion, proselytizing, and cultural respect…
  • The societal value of ceremony, the luxury of it, and the power of a well written obituary…
  • The complexities of acts of faith…
  • What life do we bring to a home? What actual contributions do each of us make?
  • You cannot escape yourself simply by relocating.
  • Which are you, at heart: a keeper of the home or an adventurer? Does your life reflect this truth?
  • …and so very many other insights to human nature, both the beautiful and the abhorrent.

   Whew! Like I said, this book is short but powerful. The author achieved something wonderful here, and I sure hope you take time to absorb and enjoy it.

My friends have sweet hook ups.

   Bonus announcement: My friend Julia with the sweet literary hook ups is who gifted me this book in the first place. She has recently intimated that I stand a pretty decent chance of meeting and interviewing the author.

   You guys. This is my favorite thing ever, meeting and interviewing authors of excellent books like this. I will of course keep you posted.

   In closing, a community question: If Gabrielle Burton visits the Lazy W, what should I serve? Steak tartare?

Read books! 
Read All the Books!!
xoxoxoxo

 

Introducing Tiny Mr. T

   Well hello again.

   I want to tell you about something.

   If you and I are Facebook friends or if we connect on Instagram, then you may have noticed a flood of unusual photos lately. The Lazy W world has a new cast member… 
   Tiny Mr. T.
   He is pretty much the coolest thing ever.
   Handsome gifted me with not one but two Tiny T’s just a few minutes after I crossed the finish line at the Memorial half marathon. I laughed so hard!

   One T is several inches tall and wears a small replica race bib with my runner number on it. He sits on my desk in the Apartment and guards my messes there. The smaller one, hereafter known as Tiny T, is Polly Pocket size and has been joining me on all kinds of adventures, farm related and otherwise, ever since that Sunday.
Tiny T helps me thin carrots and radishes where they grow too thick.
Tiny T supports the slow food movement for sure.
   It’s one of those perfect, impossible to duplicate gifts. And I  hope my guy knows how much I appreciate them both.

   So now you have met Tiny T, and I am wondering if you love him as much as I do.

   The real Mr. T has been a cult favorite of mine since childhood. So cool. I tried to dress up like him for Halloween last year, but Handsome absolutely did not want to be seen with a girl dressed like that. Can’t imagine why.

   For many passionate reasons I just can’t get enough Mr. T. And no, it’s not embarrassing at all. Frankly I don’t understand why more people DON’T love him. 

   He pities fools, you guys!!!
   Furthermore:

  1. Mr. T. wears as many dang necklaces as he wants. Sorta like me, but even more. 
  2. He has the coolest hairstyle and beard, way cool, not that I would dare copy such coolness. James Harden has it goin’ on, but he was not the first.
  3. Mr. T used to carry around the biggest, bulkiest boombox just to strut through life bathed in the aura of good music. Who else is that cool? Nobody. Now we all settle for earbuds. At least some of us do still strut through life.
  4. Mr. T always seems to wearing a great threadbare denim jacket. Surely I don’t have to explain this.
  5. Mr. T is strong and capable and fearsome; but he admits his weakness, which is a debilitating fear of flying (at least in the role of B.A. in The A Team). I admire anyone who doesn’t try to conceal his flaws.
  6. Finally? He never tolerates sleeves. The original t-shirt surgeon.
Side Note: It took me forty five minutes to figure out
how to NOT say “t-shirt surgery doer.”  Surgist? Surgeryist? 
WHAT IS IT? Oh, surgeon. Right. Onward.
   So now in adulthood I cling to my action-figure Tiny Mr. T with lots of ridiculous hilarity and sincere appreciation. Since that race Sunday, Tiny Mr. T has been joining me on all kinds of adventures. It’s been a busy couple of weeks for both of us.
   Care to take a peek?
Tiny Mr. T groomed and watered my potted herbs and then insisted
I finish digging the circular herb bed outside the kitchen window.
I still haven’t quite finished it, and Tiny T furrows his brow in frustration, pitying me.
Tiny Mr. T collected eggs very early one morning
and is so short (sorry, it’s true)
that he almost got lost in the shred.
But then he is so strong that he clawed his way out. 
The hens are surprisingly not afraid of him at all.
Tiny Mr. T went with me to substitute teach a first grade class one morning.
Those precocious kids saw him in my hand and promptly asked me,
“Mrs. Wreath why are you carrying around a small James Harden?”
If you are an OKC Thunder basketball fan then you understand this problem.
I swiftly corrected their misstep and gave them all detention.
Tiny Mr. T accompanied me to a book club discussion dinner for Don Quixote.
He chimed in sparingly, believing the knight-errant hero to be quite out of his mind like Murdock,
 then pitied the next person who assigned us another classic to read. 
“It’s summertime now and we need easier stuff!” He said.
Then Tiny T went with Handsome and me to work the first car show of this new season.
He collected money and guarded it well.
Tiny T appreciates beautiful cars and is very protective of them.
On a chilly and gray Saturday afternoon Handsome and I went
to the Zombie Bolt, a really crazy fun 5-K event here in Oklahoma.
Tiny T went with us and is on the verge of declaring zombies as equally terrifying as airplanes.
Can you blame him? Tiny T is barely an appetizer to these creatures.
Although I have been trying to eat clean and detox a little, 
and be super productive and cram activity into every spare hour,
Tiny T understands the value of rest.
On a recent lunch break while subbing fifth grade, 
he urged me to chill. Have a snickers. Read a book. Order some seeds. 
I did, and it was bliss. Tiny T gets it.
   Okay friends. Are you with me? Are you beginning to feel the power and wisdom Tiny T has to offer? Will you please join his fan club? Just follow along with his adventures on Instagram and if you have a character he needs to meet, let me know! Some friends of ours are apparently searching for a tiny A-Team van for Tiny T, and I groove that.
“I believe in the golden rule.
 The man with the gold… Rules.”
 ~Mr. T
xoxoxoxo   

Spring Garden Update

   Spring is really, truly here you guys. It is here to stay, at least for a while. We may only have a couple of weeks before Oklahoma Summer 2013 descends on us in all of her hot and humid glory, so I have a lot of green and dirty living to do. Lots to prepare and enjoy before facing that particular seasonal brutality.

   The gardens are filling in their own blanks quite nicely. They require thinning and grooming every day, especially in the radish and carrot beds, but no watering! Our rainfall in Oklahoma has been mercifully consistent.

My Grandpa has always gently scolded me for planting radishes too thickly.
The result is having to thin aggressively, but my chickens & geese eat the sprouts.
Sometimes I do too, in a green salad. They look like clover & taste peppery, tangy.

   The potatoes are finally multiplying. The spinach, rainbow chard, and myriad lettuces are drop dead gorgeous. And even more delicious than the are pretty. The sweet pea and English pea vines are as tall and fluffy as anything you’ve ever seen in your life. Honestly? This year the actual leaves on the pea vine are ginormous! Like, Jurassic big. Way too big really. I am afraid of how big the peas will be. Bowling ball size? Probably.

Back Seeded Simpson and Romaine lettuce sprouts, photo taken a couple of weeks ago.
Imagine they are a million times fuller now. Because they are.

   Last night I discovered my first butter colored cauliflower you guys! She is pale yellow, dense, and perfect. Tucked primly inside the massive green plant she calls home, dreaming calmly of low-carb recipes. Her neighbor, the brussel sprout, is putting on evidence of edibility too. Broccoli, two kinds of cabbage, blackberries, tomatoes, peppers, squash, eggplant, you name it. So far, except for corn and basil, we have a little bit of everything growing somewhere around here. Even chocolate mint which smells like angels in heaven are making York peppermint patties for breakfast while watching Casablanca.

This broccoli bolted on a hot day. But if you pinch off the center blooms and keep yellow leaves cleaned off,
the plant will set food peripherally and the results are DELISH.
Colorful green and red (purple) cabbages are tightening up finally, and the spinach fills in beautifully.

   Another sign of spring, Chink-hi the buffalo has begun his annual shed extravaganza  So cute. I need to snap some photos for you, because the way his body releases its winter coat, the patterns in which he gradually achieves his warm weather version of nudity, is so hilarious. Right now his skinny little rump and the wide spaces around his giant liquid eyes are the only bare spots. And they reveal how crazy thick his coat has been all these months! Like an inch of matted, woolly fur all over his strong body. No joke.

   I have had our house windows open for days. Very little wind here except during the nighttime thunderstorms, just cool crisp breezes. And temperatures are looking better and better every day. This is a rare kind of meteorological bliss for us here in Indian Territory.

   I am done substitute teaching for the school year.

   The laundry is caught up.

   The kitchen is stocked.

   And I have that “the world is my oyster” kinda feeling. Can you guess that today and for as many days after as I can manage it, Handsome will find me half-buried in the gardens? Dirt manicures, rolled up jeans, and careless ponytails. These are the days. These are the weeks.

Thornless blackberry vines crawling up our forest-pole arbor.
They have set dozens, maybe hundreds of buds already.

   This is the life.

   What’s growing in your garden? Please connect with this blog on Facebook and share photos! So fun to see what people love in different parts of this beautiful world. Happy Spring-slash-Summer you guys.

“Won’t you come into my garden?
 I want my roses to see you.”
 ~Richard Sheridan
18th century Irish playwright & poet
xoxoxoxo

 

Senses Inventory, Friday Joy

   Happy Friday afternoon my beautiful friends! What a week. Yes, I say that a lot. But I always mean it.

   What. A. Week.

   What a month.

   What a year.

   What a life!

   As we tip-toe toward the quick little recess we call a weekend, I have exactly enough time and energy for a Senses Inventory…


My youngest daughter and I saw this at the OKC Arts Fest again last week.
Every year she and I contribute to this cool community art display,
nothing more than shreds of fabric tied to some PVC structures.
And this year I am bringing the inspiration home. 
The veggie garden arbor is getting dolled up!
All visitors this summer are invited to play!

See: A pair of cardinals dancing in the air above the bird feeder. Stacks of folded clean laundry in the living room. A mason jar filled with browned but still pretty clippings from the forest. A flat of newly purchased herbs and marigolds on the table next to me. My unfinished Don Quixote. (Book club dinner is in two hours, yikes!) Shiny yellow ceramic dish shaped like cabbage leaves. Abundant, if cool, sunshine. Thick, soft green grass outside the kitchen door. One inviting chaise lounge and one shredded by a recent conflict with the buffalo.

Hear: Pacino grooming his papery feathers, blowing me parrot kisses, and clucking softly. The periodic click of the oven and hum of the refrigerator. Pickup truck driving past the farm. Wind. So much wind.

Smell: Clean laundry, pecan shortbread cookies, soapy water, coffee, roasting red grapes, seven different fresh herbs and their damp soil (I love that fragrance!), and my own perfume. Calvin Klein One today.

Touch: This beloved keyboard. My smooth cotton apron. A pair of wire-rimmed sunglasses that keep getting tangled up in my hair.

Taste: Perfect coffee. Really, really perfect coffee. The kind made with a French Press and hot cream. So good. Also, traces of olive oil, sea salt, and rosemary, plus toasted pecans and butter shortbread, all from sampling two recipes as I cooked this afternoon. Lipstick.

Think: About my daughters. Their hearts, their memories, their futures. About my parents. About the balance between living life and earning a living. About self worth and how complicated and fluctuating that concept is for me. About how I need about a month of nothing else to do so I can catch up on all of the incredible writers close to me.

Feel: Inspired. Calm. Stronger than I did this time a year ago, that’s for sure. Itching to run again. Excited for our book club dinner tonight, but also sad because we have recently lost members. Lucky. I feel so dang lucky in life.

The raised beds are growing our earliest crops like magic!!
Even the tropicals are faring well in this super weird May weather.

   What’s up with you? Was your work week overall pretty amazing? Do you have beauty surrounding you and love inspiring you? Do you have thoughts worth thinking rattling around in your head?

   Life isn’t perfect, but it certainly is full of wonder and grace. Be sure to feed that wolf, the good one, as the Native American legend goes, not the evil one.

Happy Weekending Everyone!
Thank you so much for stopping in at the digital Lazy W.
xoxoxoxo