Lazy W Marie

Carpeing all the diems in semi-rural Oklahoma...xoxo

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Egg-cellent Apron Giveaway Today!

   So did anyone notice the little egg counter over there creep up and pass the 800 goal? A couple of days ago I collected “the“egg plus a few more, then yesterday Handsome and I ate them for brunch along with orange segments and some toasted and heavily buttered homemade English muffin bread. YUM. Egg #804 was as delish as all the others.

   Well, this morning I was in the barn raking hay off a large bale for breakfast for the buffalo and horses, when my steel rake hit something hard. Clink! I climbed up and reached around (foolish, perhaps, as it could have been anything. Like maybe a snake. A metal snake?) But my hand felt a nest of cold eggs!

   So here in this photo we have eggs #805-808. Of course, the rake did some damage to one of these little liquid-chickens-in-a-package, so it was promptly donated back to the hens who have already devoured the extra protein.

We love our chickens!

   Okay! So it’s time for that custom apron set giveaway! Please feel free to comment here or on Facebook or Twitter. A few fine readers have already thrown their names into the hat on Facebook, which is awesome! The more the merrier, and enter as often as you like. I’ll do a drawing this evening.

   The winner will receive a complimentary custom apron with coordinating dish towel! Aaaannnddd…  everyone else who enters will receive a 25% discount on a Green Goose Textiles purchase, just in time for the upcoming baking season!

   Have a beautiful Sunday everyone. In our corner of paradise, the sun is sparkling and the air is cool. Love is breathing deeply and keeping us on track.

“Compassion is the antitoxin of the soul:
where there is compassion 
even the most
poisonous impulses 
remain relatively harmless.”
~Eric Hoffer

Be Compassionate. Everyone Needs It.
Including Chickens Whose Babies We Eat.
xoxoxo

Tomorrow is a New Day

   Today was strange. I read a lot, but not all books, certainly not all books I had decided were nourishing and worth my time. I thought and ruminated longer and harder than I planned to and went for an overly emotional run in the back field. I enjoyed a spontaneous lunch in town with my Momma. Then I went shopping for new vitamins, did some window shopping for my first born chicken’s upcoming birthday, and met Handsome at home for a sleepy and affectionate afternoon.

This beautiful baby will be seventeen on Saturday.
When I look at her sweet face or think of the time that has passed, I cannot breathe.
   Handsome and I ate a light supper and I studied several pages of The Odyssey then we watched the sun sink behind that same back field where I ran earlier, citronella lamp glowing between our lounge chairs. We listened to the horses crunching grass. I stretched and reflected on how little I did today, hating myself for it. He tended to a flock of guineas sounding their Owl Alarm. 
   Overall it was a dense but calm day, inactive compared to most weekdays around here, and I am frustrated by the bare minimum feel of it all.

   But tomorrow is Friday, an excellent day to extinguish that staleness! My lists are plentiful and always growing and shifting, just like space and time, but I am lucky blessed enough to have all the resources to accomplish whatever I decide is important. Maybe not every single thing I conceive, but surely every single thing to which I actually apply myself  What is that saying we all have been seeing on the site that rhymes with Zenterest?

“You can do anything you want, 
but not everything.”

   
   That is the crux, isn’t it? Deciding what should fall away, what is nothing more than a distraction or an outright attack.

 
   Resisting the pull of that door to the Worry Room, swimming strongly through the waves of pain and challenging emotions without succumbing to the old downward spiral.

   Looking up when the habit of staring inward becomes unproductive. Seeking beauty and surrounding ourselves with it, celebrating it in all of its intricate and surprising incarnations. These are the actions that replace the slippery, dangerous ones. These keep me out of the Worry Room and back on track, doing more than just whittling down lists of projects. These positive habits keep me in the business of building life and cultivating joy.

   Thanks for listening to me ramble! I just needed a little pep talk tonight, to be ready for a big, rich, textured day tomorrow! I hope you are closing up your week with a healthy perspective to match a satisfying routine. I hope you feel loved and are finding ways every day to show it. I hope you can look up and know you are seen and heard.

Oblah-Di, Oblah-dah!
xoxoxoxo



Pinspired in the Kitchen

   Hey you guys! (By the way, sometimes when I say that I do it long and drawn out and super loud, like on Electric Company. Remember that awesome show?) This summer I have collected more gorgeous, tempting, and inspiring ideas on Pinterest than is probably healthy for any one person. One day I was even (politely) kicked off of the site by the Pinterest Powers That Be for displaying signs of being a Spammer. I Pin you not. They actually thought I was Spam. I am not Spam. But I do love me some Pinterest.

   Anyway, it’s been a while since I posted Pinterest experiments here on this blog, so tonight I’m just gonna offer up half a dozen recipes drawn from that deep, glorious, digital well of brilliant ideas. The only photo I am using here is my own. And I have linked you to the original posts then included my notes for each.

   Ready? Okay! (Say that like a cheerleader.)

Cooking hot dogs in a slow cooker:
Crock Pot 365 blog
WAHOO, this works pretty great! They really did taste like the roller-cooker style hot dogs you might buy at a gas station.

Muffins that taste like donuts:
Stylish Cuisine blog

   Okay. These. Are. Delish. They are tender, soft, and yummy, and the buttery-sugary coating is just so good. Downside? This recipe is tiny. I mean, it doesn’t make very many individual servings. I made mine as miniature muffins, and they spilled over so far that the muffin tops ended up looking more like cookies. Not a disaster, unless presentation counts for you. I had made these to send to Handsome’s office food day, but they were rather ugly, so…we ate them all. We are martyrs in that way.
Suggestion: use muffin papers and double the recipe.

Zuchinni Tots
Curious Country Cook blog
Oh, yum. These were very, very good. I made them on the recommendation of our friend Steph. Even Handsome loved zuchinni tots, which is fantastic! Any new fresh-vegetable dish we both enjoy is a score. And these are fast to make, too, with few ingredients. Try this recipe!

English Muffin Bread
One Good Thing by Jillee blog
Another easy recipe with big returns on flavor and homemade goodness kitchen Karma. Do you love English muffins? This bread has that fab texture on both sides when you slice it. And as with most homemade bread, the lingering aroma pretty much doubles the work pleasure.
Suggestion: Make this in triplicate. I shared some with our neighbor as a thanks for inviting our horses to graze on his rye grass meadow, and he loved it too!

Buffalo Chicken Dip
Tidy Mom blog 
I made this for Handsome on a night I was absent for book club or beekeeping or something. I thought it would be super satisfying for him, kind of a comforting, spicy, guy’s dinner for playing video games or whatever. I served it with a big bag of tortilla chips and wished him luck. It turned out okay, but he was not crazy about it.
Suggestion: Use less of something liquid, maybe the ranch dressing, or maybe add more chicken. I think it would be flat out delish and addictive with a little more substance. Or maybe my guy was just sad I was gone all night.

Butterfinger Chunk Cookies
Recipe Girl blog
These are so tasty, and obviously the aroma? Oh my… The whole farm smelled like Butterfingers and bread and general bakery goodness the afternoon I made these for a going-away-to-college dinner for our friend’s son. But they are not fool proof. I baked these exactly according to the recipe, but they were too crisp for my taste. As in, they stuck in my teeth. Not fun, but still tasty.
Suggestion: Under cook these bad boys more drastically than you have ever under cooked anything in your culinary life. 

So there you have a handful of recipes to try! Perhaps it seems like all we do is eat. Perhaps that is a fact.

What’s Cooking in Your Kitchen These Days?
xoxoxoxo

Closing the Door to Worry

   Sometimes yesterday, though I cannot tell you what time, something really special happened to me. 
At the risk of sounding too mystical or weird, I’d say it was an outright personal vision. 
   Without warning, my heart felt years of stagnant, accumulated worry just melt down 
into a deep, still puddle and retreat behind a door, like a weak and frightened oil spill. 
It just poured out of my spirit somehow then silently disappeared. All of it. 
Then with my mind, no… even with my actual eyeballs, I saw that door closing.
   Does this freak you out at all? I hope not. It was a wholly positive experience. 
Please listen to just a little more…

   I wasn’t sure for a few minutes what was happening, but as it sank in I felt better and better. Handsome is home from the office this week. In fact, yesterday was his thirty-seventh birthday! We went about our relaxing and I never mentioned it to him until tonight.

   But the relief gradually transformed into joy. Then this morning I woke up with an even more concentrated sense of freedom, and I am so excited to share it with you guys now!


I found this image and traced it back to a site called Nooks and Crannies, 
but the original link no longer exists.
So I have no idea where this breathtaking door
can actually be found, but isn’t it great?

   Again, what I saw most vividly was a door. A tall, heavy, beautiful, carved and gilded wooden door, a door that once and for all and right before my eyes closed shut against a cavernous room filled with all of my worries. More worries even than what could possibly have melted out of me a moment ago. That room was deep and dark and lonely, hopeless, unproductive. And the door closed of its own accord. I heard the complicated latch click; I heard the wood groan; and I saw a little puff of dust escape through the paper thin space at the floor.

   You guys, it was a brief event, but so incredible.

   The longer I sit with this feeling, this new lightness of spirit, the more beautiful that door seems to me. It has been changing shapes and colors all day as I try to recall the original image.

The source of this pretty photo is first Santa Barbara Chic then Caroline Arber.

   One minute, it is squared and unfinished, rough wood strapped with ancient iron fixtures. Another minute my mind has it appearing as stucco and draped with flowering bougainvillea vines, flanked by overflowing pots of fragrant herbs. Surely by tomorrow I will see this important door a half dozen more ways.

   This door that has sealed off worry is always thick and substantial. It is always strong and quiet, resolute in its duty to save me from myself. It sort of smiles at me (if doors can smile) and it reminds me in its still strength that reentering the Worry Room would be a deliberate choice on my part. It would require a decision and some energy spent to go keep company with those old worries again.

   So throughout today I have smiled back at the tall, mysterious, miraculous door; then I shift my focus.

   With the Worry Room full but locked behind me, I can see the rest of my world better. Unhindered and less fearful. I see the wild and lively gardens of life all around me… my marriage, my children, our parents, friends, and family, work, dreams, so many goals and hopes that have been on the back burner all this time because of worry. I can now reapply my time and energy where it will be much more profitable.

   Something besides me closed that door. Something else caused all of this to happen, and now everything is possible. I am suddenly and very happily released from that wasteful room.

   Stephanie, stop worrying. You have always loved beautiful doors, right? 
Every time I see one I think of you, and this one was no exception. 
I love you, and I hope you can close the door to your worries soon. 
   That’s about all I have to tell you about what happened yesterday. The precipitating effects promise to be numerous, though. I can hardly think of a part of life that won’t benefit from this new freedom and strength. 
Best wishes everyone. Worry is a waste. 
xoxoxoxo

Insomnia Senses Inventory

It is now almost five in the morning, a perfectly reasonable hour 
for writing and drinking coffee and organizing my crazy self, 
but I have actually been laying awake for many hours.
My mind is spinning and I feel rested enough, 
but a little something tells me I’m going to pay for this nocturnal indiscretion later.
We have an incredibly busy day ahead, 
with tasks touching almost every major area of life.
Wish me luck today?
********************

See: The dining room table is chaotic, filled to the edges and piled high with the contents of yesterday’s massive kitchen purge. It isn’t too pretty, yet somehow a vase of fresh flowers from a friend, a plate of sparkling, sugar coated muffins, and my writing stuff all make it bearable. Oh! And a bowl of drying okra. I really need to tell you guys about this soon.

Hear:  The fridge is humming meditatively, and from time to time I hear the sleepy trill of a guinea outside. Now the air conditioner has kicked on. I am trying to move about as quietly as possible so Handsome can tank up on rest. Our bedroom is, of course, directly above the noisiest possible downstairs room.

Smell: Buttery, cinnamon-sugar coating of these terrible donut muffins immediately to my right. Freshly brewed, strong, excellent coffee. And faintly bleached water from the vase of fresh flowers.

Taste:  Perfect first cup of coffee. And OKAY OKAY one tiny little bite of cinnamon-sugar donut muffin. Sheesh. Sue me.

Touch:  Invisibly soft tank top and cotton PJ shorts with Swiss dots all over them. I love the soft, nubby texture of Swiss dots, the feel of those little bunches of stitches. It reminds me of milk glass. Also, the cool, still air conditioned house. The wood and iron chair holding me. A hot mug in my left hand and a skinny hotel ink pen in my right.

Think: 

  • About this book I just finished, about depression and anxiety being more than just moods for some people. 
  • About the incredible force of ego in human relationships.
  • Is our nation really as divided now as we were during the Civil War? If so, to what end?
  • Do horses dream? I woke up having dreamed of our sweet behemoth Chanta, and I was just wondering if he ever dreams about me. I think he is on the verge of saddle love. I mostly think this because it’s been a few months since I had to make an emergency trip to the dentist.
  • What am I going to do about church?
  • What can I possibly bake this morning for Handsome to take to the office for a food day? Having cleaned out the pantry and fridge yesterday, supplies are unusually low. I shall send a box and a half of off brand cereal.
Feel:
  • Nervous, happy, tense excitement about the possibility of teaching a home school cooking class to my two daughters and their adorable stepbrother.
  • Worried about one of my sweet sisters.
  • Worried for two of my wonderful girlfriends.
  • Missing my Grandpa a lot, I really need to go see him. He should totally teach a gardening class.
  • I feel so healthy. A bit on the sugary side this week, but I know how to fix that. I feel so deep down grateful for my overall good health. I finally see that this is a blessing not to be taken for granted.
********************

You guys, I wish you the happiest, healthiest, 
most peaceful and productive Friday ever!
Whatever your appointment sheet looks like,
However many thousands of big or little things are crowding your mind,
Whoever is pulling at your beautiful heart,
Just take things in stride.

You can control yourself, not others.
So don’t sweat stuff. It might not be about you.
Still, your imagination is powerful beyond belief,
and God loves you and wants to answer your prayers.

Life is good.
It’s hard, but it’s good.
Count your blessings today,
and I bet you this plate of sparkly muffins 
they will multiply right before your eyes.

Be Sweet, TGIF!
xoxoxoxo