Chim Chimmery

   With the weather warming up so much, the horses have been shedding like crazy. And so I have been brushing them like crazy, something that is so nice for both horse and human that it can scarcely be called a “chore.” Each of our three pasture ornaments has a certain way he or she likes to be groomed, and if you do it right you usually end up with a sleeping behemoth leaning against you. That’s kind of the paycheck for this particular task. All of them appreciate a nice lullaby, too, so I sing while I brush. Thank goodness they are not too picky about pitch, tone, or volume.

   The other day I caught myself singing Chanta a song that my human chickens used to love, too, one we sang every night at bedtime for years. Chim Chimmeree from Mary Poppins. Do you know it? It is soft and slow and sounds a little bit sad, but only until you really listen to the words… Then all of a sudden there is gentle contentment in this song, and truly it describes how I finally feel about my life, my job, my station in this world.

   Sometimes being W-2 challenged serves up a bit of an identity crisis, especially without children at home to justify my being home, at least publicly. I have friends with fascinating careers who are tempted to abandon them. Other friends have children but still crave something more. Several beautiful women in my life are ready for romance and frustrated by the games people play. We all have days when we envy other people’s situation a little bit, and possibly even feel intimidated. For example, I have so much admiration not only for homeschooling moms but also for professional women who keep it all together that sometimes I let it crush me. Then all of a sudden my joy has evaporated. Unfulfilled longings can be very painful, and we all feel that from time to time.

   This is such a waste of time and energy. Each of us plays a part in this world, and each of us has been given unmeasured gifts and blessings that are unique to our lives and our souls. In fact, I think that the same gift in one life will manifest very differently in another because of each person’s uniqueness. A deep, refreshing well of wonder can be found in learning to appreciate your own special circumstances long before anyone else appreciates it for you, regardless of whether anyone else ever does, even.

   I am not suggesting that we stop reaching for goals or blind ourselves to the possibilities of change; quite the opposite. I am suggesting that we spark change with appreciation instead of envy. Learning to savor the details of my life, evolving and unplanned though they may be, has done wonders for my heart. With that appreciation comes increased contentment, confidence, and joy! This has allowed me to be friends with women who not very long ago would have intimidated me to that point of crumbling retreat. It has allowed me to dream more freely and laugh a lot more. I wish for longer days instead of shorter ones, and lately I can pray for my children with more faith than worry. So the precipitation of learning to love your life, no matter how it may look to other people, is incredibly nourishing. Start today.

   I certainly hope for a future where I can impart this feeling and so much more to my girls. Maybe the lullaby sank into their hearts years ago and they’ll realize it along with me.

The Ladder of Life is an Illusion, Be Happy. 
xoxoxoxo


Linking up to Mama Kat, in answer to her question: What do you love most about your job?