Lazy W Marie

Carpeing all the diems in semi-rural Oklahoma...xoxo

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friday 5 at the farm, april 1, 2022

April 1, 2022

Hello friends, and happy Friday to you! Spring has 100% sprung at the farm, and I am staying pretty busy these days. As usual I have more stories to share than time to write them, but how about an old fashioned Friday 5 post, just to timestamp?

(1) SCARLETT: As of today, our precious adopted calf has officially been with us for four weeks. I could tell you at least thirteen stories from every single one of those days, she has so generously filled our home with love and dimension. She has the sweetest, most trusting, most innocent spirit (with eyes to match), and her frostbite injuries don’t seem to faze her too much (more updates on her in a separate post). Happy one month at the W, Little Miss!

(2) GARDENS & PROPERTY FACELIFTS: I can say with confidence and excitement that spring has sprung here. The redbuds and fruit trees are frilled with bright, tissue paper blossoms, the tulips and daffodils are showing off their Easter best, the hydrangeas and blackberry vines have sprouted tentative little green leaves, and one room of our house is overtaken with seed trays, heat mats, and grow lights. The seed sowing, misting, watching, reorienting, and misting again has been fun. I love the rush of “new life” energy this time of year. Outdoors, besides garden cleanup and planting a few beds of leafy greens and snow peas, I have enjoyed flipping, emptying, and refilling the three compost systems as often as natural decomposition allows it. A few days ago I discovered baby snakes had hatched in one compost bin, which is always a sure sign that warmth is here to stay. Handsome has been moving sapling pine trees to a new wildflower meadow for a privacy screen, and he is reconfiguring some of the pathways and driveways leading from the gravel drive to the lawn near the yurt, hoping to make circling through easier and prettier. Also, on a whim last weekend, he painted two large garage doors glossy black, to match other accents on our house and car shop. It looks so much better, I can’t believe we didn’t do that years ago! Love the black with our turquoise front door and lots of garden color, especially right now while the Jane magnolia is in bloom.

(3) SHEPPS: Velvet and Lincoln are visiting the farm this week, and we have been having some fun! They are all aging slowly and appreciate a good nap (as pictured below), but between naps they still play and romp with lots of puppy energy. Velvet has delighted us with a brand new surge of affection for Handsome, a privilege for which he has been bargaining all these (nearly) seven years.

(4) BOOKS: Because I am elbow deep in two heftier than usual writing projects, I am not reading anything new right now. Instead, in spare moments, I am rereading chunks of The Well Gardened Mind by Dr. Sue Stuart Smith. Chapter six is especially mouthwatering, all about the culture of gardening versus farming and the value of growing things for pleasure before necessity. Gardening to thrive, in other words, not merely survive. It’s a theme popping up everywhere I look lately, and it feels important. In a few weeks we will be hosting a dinner discussion for The Book of Hope. Very excited about that.

(5) CAR SHOW: Last weekend we (meaning my husband, ha! but I did bring donuts and a picnic and keep Klaus entertained) helped our friend’s daughter and her college group host a charity car show in Edmond. It was the most beautiful day to be outdoors, and we so enjoyed seeing car show friends we hadn’t seen in a while. He trailered the Batmobile fir display, too, which is always a good time. The group did an excellent job pulling everything together, and they raised several hundred dollars for their school’s campaign to benefit the Children’s Miracle Network. Hopefully it was the first of not only their ongoing car show efforts but also our own packed car show season. We have really missed it these past two years!

Okay friends, what’s going on in your world? Are you primed and ready to grow something beautiful this year? Are you deep cleaning your house or maybe wrapping up spring break? What are you reading these days?

Thanks for checking in. See you soon for Scarlett stories and a brand new interview.

Redeem the Time
XOXOXOXO

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Filed Under: UncategorizedTagged: carpe diem, choose joy, farm life, friday 5 at the farm, gardening, gratitude, Klaus, scarlett

late winter bliss list

February 26, 2022

It’s been a while since I have written a Bliss List, and as I sat down to remedy that I doubted my timing.

Russia has invaded Ukraine, I have friends and loved ones in crisis, and Jocelyn is still gone.  Life in general has plenty of heartache and shadows, so as usual I wrestle with the guilt of celebrating, well, anything.

And yet, what always wins that internal wrestling match is the knowledge that counting blessings matters. Giving time and attention to the goodness in our lives only allows it to multiply. Letting God know that we see and appreciate the answers He has already sent us keeps us on the lookout for the answers still coming.

  • Early in January I reflected on a full bodied, joyful holiday season, giving thanks for time with loved ones and the ability to celebrate in our favorite ways. We really had a magical Thanksgiving and Christmas season. Bliss to keep traditions the way we do and make note of the memories.
  • Clearing out the Christmas décor more thoughtfully than ever, taking time to scour the storage space and organize it all by season and holiday. Walking space!! Donations! Law and Order in the attic! Bliss to finally have that mammoth job done.
  • Tender moments with our friend who lost her Mom in January. A memorable sunset the night she passed moving funeral that honestly left us both inspired to live in quieter, more meaningful ways, and a glorious sunny day the afternoon of her burial. Sad, yes, but also bliss to experience that depth of love, even peripherally.
  • Innumerable long, loving conversations with Jess every week. Constant contact and ongoing closeness with her and Alex. A few surprise visits and always fun with the pups! Laika had a little surgery and Bean stayed at the farm for a few days. Bliss to share life with them in such natural, easy ways. Bliss to witness their love story and their growth as people.
  • I baked a snowflake cinnamon bread for Cara, one final holiday baking effort! And that same day Jessica and I went fabric shopping for her new aprons. I absolutely love seeing her thirst for color and flavor, both in the kitchen and in life. Bliss to be out in the world with my girl, to see a friend, and to share some creative energy.
  • In late January, my husband and I celebrated his mom Judy’s birthday, just the two of us. We had a long delayed meal at Saltgrass, the last restaurant she wanted to take us to before she died suddenly. I wrote her a long letter to her, trying to update her on the life events has missed since her passing, an impossible feat, but the act of trying was good for us, and we may have sparked a new tradition. Another sad day, but also, bliss to conjure up her spirit and to share our hushed grief a little bit.
  • Blood donation! This appointment had been rescheduled for many weeks due to weather, covid exposure, and other life complications; so it felt like a major accomplishment to get back on track. My blood pressure was super low that day, but still my left arm sprayed nearly black blood like a fountain all over the chair next to me. Bliss to be healthy enough to do this, to sit still for half an hour reading a book, and then to eat snacks all afternoon, ha.
  • We enjoyed a new Outreach project that fueled and motivated us for several weeks. A single mom and her twelve year old daughter had just arrived in Oklahoma after a long, treacherous journey fleeing wildfires and homelessness in California. We were inundated with donations from friends then went shopping to make sure their new home was well furnished and comfy. Meeting these sweet people after chatting for a few weeks, to prepare, was almost too much. Very emotional. Bliss to connect with strangers and have a small hand in helping them feel at home in our state.
  • Running has felt great the past few months, a gift for which I am so thankful. I have reminded myself that a speed workout once or twice per week is safe and fun. I have built mileage steadily, happily. And I have managed to resist exterior pressures about expensive races. Bliss to run better and on my own terms.
  • Two massive arctic storms, both of which could have been much more destructive, came and went since the holidays. We are so thankful for healthy, safe animals and for continual electricity. One of the storms brought heaps and heaps of gorgeous snow, which was really fun. This most recent storm that brought mostly sleet and ice was still pretty, and I am so thankful that Jess and BW and our other local loved ones stayed safe on the roads. Bliss to survive weird winter weather in Oklahoma.
  • Both Chanta and Dusty had health scares this past month, between the winter storms, and both of them turned out okay. I am so thankful for their health, so thankful for the thick blankets they wear during arctic blasts, so thankful for every happy year we enjoy with them. Bliss to see them walking and eating comfortably.
  • Surprise quality time with our friends Lynn and Jimmy Dale, time to laugh and dream and pray for all of our kids. Time to normalize parenting difficulties and heartaches, then laugh some more. Plus they let us try out their performance stilts! Bliss to enjoy easy, spontaneous quality time with friends.
  • Birthday gifts shipped to siblings in Los Angeles and Spain. Feeling better connected to them than ever before, despite the miles that separate us. Also daydreaming about trips to both places! Bliss to nurture adult friendship with my siblings.
  • It really makes me happy to have a loafing shed stuffed with giant round bales of hay. It’s as good a feeling, maybe better, as having the grocery shopping done a week before a major holiday. Bliss to be well prepared and secure.
  • Book discussion Zooms with friends in faraway places, personal prayerful video conference with two respected and beloved women, and a much needed Zoom with my sisters. I need these connections, and I am thankful for them. Bliss to connect with people in meaningful ways.
  • So many great books this winter! Since Thanksgiving I have already read more creative fiction than I did all of the previous year, and I am enjoying it. My spirit has needed it, this pleasure of reading books I want to read and reading books that stimulate my storytelling mind. Bliss to read slowly and deeply.
  • A few weeks ago I started shaping and amending soil for a brand new pizza garden! Oh my gosh, it’s so exciting. Bliss to wear thin gloves and let my body take over from memory, to feel my spade crunch through the sleeping earth, bliss to watch the blank circle emerge from the snow and mud. Bliss to work the compost, too.
  • We finally watched The Art of Racing in the Rain with Jess! Family pizza night. Good, relatable cry. Great laughs. Many cuddles with Klaus and Bean. Bliss in every way.
  • A couple of days in a row during a warm spell, we spent some quality time with our neighbors and new friends Rex and Cathy. They are so fun and easy to talk to, so rich in life experiences and so steeped in Love, being in their company is the best feeling. Bliss to have neighbors we love and enjoy so much.
  • I spent a few hours here and there with buckets of hot water, cleaning solutions, and scrub brushes, and I loved it. Bliss to get a head start on spring cleaning.
  • Another sweet and quiet Valentine’s Day, our traditional heart-shaped rib eye meal at home, and some very good romance, all of it like a warm and sexy quilt. Bliss.
  • Shortly after Valentine’s, we had one fiery marital disagreement that definitely hurt both of our feelings, one of those Clash of the Titans-style conflicts that thankfully doesn’t happen very often. But we both managed to express ourselves fully and honestly, then we reconciled in a few precious, unforgettable moments. Bliss to feel that authentic reconnection and deep peace.
  • We have a handful of small farm events coming up right around the corner, and planning them is a lot of fun. Bliss to anticipate gathering our people and to plan how to feed them and how we can set the stage for memory making.
  • One day this past week we fired up the yurt heater, ready with a pail of water for the sauna rocks, and luxuriated in a 150 degree room for probably too long, ha. Bliss to feel that deep, full body sweat in the dead of winter.
  • On the afternoon we were set to deliver a trailer stuffed with furniture, appliances, and home supplies to our Outreach family, our truck had some mechanical trouble. Dennis, Brandon, and Adam showed up, though, and saved the day. The guys are always there to help, and we don’t know what we would do without them. Bliss to have friends who always make a stressful situation more fun, and who always help.
  • Yesterday my sweet, smart husband sat with me for about two hours and answered dozens of layered questions for a brand new interview project. He indulged my curiosity, shared his heart, and made me fall in love with him all over again. Bliss to know your spouse of twenty years in ever deepening ways.

Choose joy. Inventory your pleasures and sensations. List your bliss. Allow and encourage light to overtake the darkness.

“Our daily noble pursuits make us human.
War awakens the preciousness of life
and reminds us to live each moment
to the glory of God.”
~Timothy Willard
XOXOXOXO

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Filed Under: UncategorizedTagged: bliss list, carpe diem, choose joy, family, farm life

winter wake up call

February 13, 2022

For the past few years, I have noticed a moment late in winter when I worry whether I can do it all again. Somewhere past the holidays and even past the worst of the cold but too far from true warmth for even an optimist to declare an early spring, I just feel so deeply exhausted. Or, if not exhausted, then supremely comfortable. I work steadily and contentedly through the short daylight hours of January and February, mostly a very quiet farm life, and wonder whether I will have the energy for another series of busy, warm weather months.

After the final thaw and first true green up, my life will be filled with gardening and traveling, entertaining and big project wrangling, animals and farm expansion, and more. This time of year I am again deciding between a focused marathon training cycle and feeling good in a bikini. (These two goals are not necessarily compatible, which is one of life’s biggest surprises, ha!) This time of year my husband has legislative season layered on top of his normal Commish duties, which are already voluminous, so his energy drains away completely day after day, and this depletion becomes mine in many ways. I become protective of our available time and energy, forgetting that effort begets effort and energy begets energy.

None of this is a complaint! I choose every bit of it and more. This is a beautiful, complex life we have designed and which I love in great detail. And yet, gosh my mind and my body, my actual spirit, are fairly bankrupt by late winter. Sallow, like my skin.

So I worry a little, am I up to the task again? I have just recently convinced myself it was okay to read books in the late afternoon and cook dinner already showered for bed and definitely wearing pajamas. I really love our cozy living room with white twinkle lights and our stacks of fuzzy blankets, and these many consecutive nights of luxurious, gold star sleeping hours are so so so nice.

Very soon, the quiet, often starry black sky we inhale during that first cup of coffee will be noisy with roosters and already Technicolor, already gleaming with daybreak and bursting with wild potential. Soon, instead of letting me take my time waiting for first light, the farm will be antsy while I stretch awake, and every task outdoors will compete for first attention. The days will be crammed full, so full I never finish everything on The List, and I will be lucky to have showered by sunset, much less before cooking dinner, ha. I yawn against these thoughts and doubt my stamina.

I look for the snooze button on seasons.

But then…

Then it happens. We are gifted with a few extraordinarily warm, gentle afternoons, a few skies that pulse that familiar childhood shade of blue, and that intoxicating scent of freshness everywhere. Can you smell photosynthesis, or chlorophyll? Can you hear roots shimmy underground, coming back to life? The newness grows and expands gently, every day, even when a cold snap reminds me it’s still winter. It all accrues slowly along with the lengthening days, and, thankfully, my energy does too. Just a little bit at a time.

Around the days I see the first daffodil sprouts emerge from the sleepy garden beds, I begin to think that my daily routine has been too much about easy maintenance. I naturally crave traction, progress, and creation. Coasting feels stale. Resting begins to feel wasteful. My hands itch for gardening gloves instead of cozy ones, skin also longing for the silkiness of warm soil. My legs flex involuntarily when I think of crunching a spade into raw earth or forking over the compost heaps. My eyes are desperate for new colors, no longer content with all the sepia. I begin to obsessively check the horses for signs of shedding.

Gradually, my body responds to more tasks and more opportunities, especially outdoors. I feel excited again for the longer days and everything they bring along.

Nature and all her interlocking cycles inch forward without our permission and unheeding of our understanding. Ready or not, the seasons make progress. Thankfully, we are more than passengers; we are part of nature. Our energies are all intimately connected, and as the outside world moves through changes, so do we. Trust that.

If you are feeling too tired or very comfy and maybe reluctant to think of doing much more than you have been doing, take heart. Your inner resources can expand greatly as the days lengthen and the temperatures rise. The sun and the moon are your allies. You are part of nature, and this recent season of hibernation was good and necessary. What’s coming next is good and necessary, too.

I am ready. Are you?

“If you want to make your dreams come true,
the first thing you have to do is wake up.”
~J.M. Power
XOXOXO

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Filed Under: UncategorizedTagged: carpe diem, choose joy, farm life, gardening, seasons, spring, winter

JOY WEEK and Christmas Eve!!

December 24, 2021

Hey friends, Merry Christmas Eve! I missed writing to you guys about JOY week for Advent. If you have a minute, my heart is thrumming.

This photo represents one of the most incredible Christmas surprises to date.
I cannot wait to share this hilarious story!

Have you been celebrating Advent, either traditionally or in your own special way? I love a mix of the two. There is always a place for tradition, and there is also a need for making traditions very personal, for infusing everything we do with purpose and meaning. With personality! After all, the only traditions that really stick are the ones we make our own, the ones that serve us with the most authentic JOY. So dig in and be honest about how you want the holidays to be. Less obligation, more intention.

The last few weeks, I have been soaking up a magical rhythm of quiet time, reflection, and journaling, some very average farm chores and housework (soothing, you know), mixed with wild holiday activity, old songs and new understandings, lights and decorations, baking (so much baking), swimming in memories, time with friends, romance… Just keeping the current of life alive. We are all moving through time together, and I am here for it, as the kids say.

Joy is one of my favorite topics. A few years ago, you might remember, my husband started receiving this persistent message, “Count it all joy.” It became our mantra in a dark valley, and we have learned so much about it since then. Counting It All Joy is a post I wrote in 2017, when it was all fresh.

Joy has nourished us when we were tired and needed strength; it has floated gently us when we might have succumbed to grief; and joy has inspired us to build brand new things in our life. Joy changes everything. It’s the secret sauce.

How wonderful to learn that there are some ways to manufacture Joy, when it seems scarce or completely unavailable.

Have you ever tried a Joy Dare? I think Ann Voskamp first shared this idea. Find one of her templates, or better yet, make your own. Grab a notebook, have a list of prompts ready, then see how many days it takes you to journal one thousand expressions of joy. Last week I sat down to write out just a few thought prompts of my own and quickly listed 77 separate ways to count my own joy. Each of those immediately flowers into dozens of actual blessings in my life. It’s overwhelming in the best way. Joy comes to us and moves between us in such a variety of flavors and textures, it’s thrilling to articulate it all. And the act of taking stock is so empowering.

Also, learn what others have experienced. For reading material, I cannot fervently enough recommend The Book of Joy. Have you found it yet? We gobbled it up a couple of winters ago with a small group of friends, and we all gained so much from the material and from the subsequent conversations. It’s packed with wisdom and encouragement form Archbishop Desmond Tutu and His Holiness the Dalai Lama. The stories they share, the deep study, the timeless human-nature-wisdom and advice for good living, it’s all just priceless. Give it some time soon, if you haven’t already.*

Have you read The Book of Joy yet?

The 8 Pillars of Joy According to the Dalai-Lama

  • Perspective
  • Humility
  • Humor
  • Acceptance
  • Forgiveness
  • Gratitude
  • Compassion
  • Generosity

Some of my favorite Christmas carols are all about joy, and this past week I have been reflecting on the lyrics more deeply. Sing the songs that make you cry and laugh, get your family to sing with you, play the best music in your home while you work. There’s something about good music that we are designed to receive. Buddy the Elf was onto something.

Joy to the world, the Lord is come!

Let earth receive her king!

Let every heart prepare Him room,

And Heaven and nature sing

xoxoxoxo

I love how much God wants us to experience joy! He loves us so much! What He wants is for us to be joyful. We are repeatedly invited to rejoice. Re-joy ourselves and each other. It’s something we can do, not just something we occasionally, when we feel lucky, happen to notice. And then it an also be a total surprise! Of course our joy tanks can be depleted from time to time, but we can refill them. We can choose joy. We can walk the paths that pursue joy and allow it to flow generously for everyone.

I have learned that choosing joy is about a lot more than just looking on the bright side or finding the silver lining. It is that, but it is also deliberately living in whatever way cultivates the best life, the best reflection of Love, for the most people, day after day after average day, not just on holidays or for show. Choosing joy is an ongoing pattern of living that keeps us in alignment with Him.

Two more old blog posts about JOY:

A Different Mustard Seed Parable

Fractals Again, Joy Beyond Imagination, and Love

Okay, something amazing happened last week that I need to share. But it is a long story. It might need to be written in three or four chapters, so stay tuned. See the above photo.

For now, may all the details of your Christmas Eve be glowy and warm, centered in Love, steeped in just the right amount of tradition, and infused with your authentic personality. I am so excited to spend some quiet time with my own little family tomorrow. We are wildly thankful to be celebrating this Christmas in our own simple, joyful ways.

“Therefore being justified by faith,
We have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ:
By whom also we have access by faith

into this grace wherein we stand,
and rejoice in hope of the glory of God.”
Romans 5:1
XOXOXO

* Side note: The co-author Douglas Abrams has now co-authored another book, this time with the much loved Jane Goodall. The Book of Hope is newly released, and the Lazy W will be hosting a discussion dinner in January or February. Please consider yourself invited!

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Filed Under: UncategorizedTagged: advent, carpe diem, choose joy, Joy, joy dare, love

friday 5 at the farm, random animal stories

December 17, 2021

Friends, hello, hi! I have less than 38 minutes to type a blog post before it’s time to get ready for a double date. So here we go. And there will be errors. There Will Be Errors. (If you repeat that to yourself dramatically it sounds like a movie title.)

we keep it classy

Story Number One: Remember the brassica garden that was eaten voraciously by the chickens in, maybe September? Well the plants there have bounced back. They have bounced back so hard, you guys, and in fact now have cabbages and cauliflower growing enormously. Nature is amazing! I posted more about this on Instagram a few days ago. I am so happy. That particular garden healing has brought me lots of hope for spiritual battles.

Story Number Two: Today while refreshing nesting box hay and refilling waters in the chicken coop, a brick-red rooster strutted up to me, blinked sideways in that skeptical, sneering (but lovable) poultry way, and proceeded to sip fresh cold water straight from the garden hose. From the hose, you guys, like a little kid! Klaus saw this and gently snooted the rooster away to enjoy his own slurp, as this is his domain, thank you very much, along with the rest of the farm and all fun activities.

Story Number Three: I have dropped the ball on decorating one animal every day for Advent, but we are giving them all as much Christmas cheer as is farmishly possible, and we are definitely celebrating Advent ourselves in sweet little ways every day. Anyway. Ever since the day that Dusty got his fancy mane bows, Chanta has been hinting that it is, in fact his turn. He is sweetly aggressive about it, so I predict a braiding session this weekend.

Story Number Four: Another chicken coop story, but about the ducks. While I was in there cleaning up, the interior door fell open too far. We have the ducks separated for safety, and the chickens and roosters are free to pass back and fort, over the half wall. Mike Meyers Lemon followed me to the goose-occupied half of the coop yard and started freaking out because he was to far from Rick Astlee. He was too upset to allow me to just pick him up, so I walked a wide, slow circle behind him to give him a chance to see the open door. Meanwhile, Rick, from the other side of the pallet wall divider, started quacking in a higher and higher tone and more and more rapidly, just exactly the way Mike used to call for him last summer, when Rick would occasionally be lost at sunset. Who remembers that story? GAH! These ducks. They love each other. They are bros! Duck Bros! Rick’s quacking lured Mike with loving precision through the open door, and Klaus followed behind with much chuffing and a big, toothy grin.

Story Number Five: My husband outdid himself with Christmas lights and inflatables this year, and that’s saying a lot because he does a great job every year. We wake up to colorful cheerfulness early every morning, and we see it before bed too, thanks to the magic of programmable timers. Yesterday Klaus and I played fetch well after sunset, in the dark, with confetti lights and lasers flying all over him and the lawn. I loved it so much, and I loved it all over again today when I saw a bit of the action of security footage ha! More modern conveniences bringing us joy.

Ok that’s it! Time to scrape the chicken, umm, debris from my earlobes, find a clean tank top, and spritz some Febreze on my jeans. It’s Friday night in the big town! (Locals, name the meteorologist who used to say that)

How many errors did you find? Please check in soon for a whole post about JOY!!

ALL IS MERRY AND BRIGHT
XOXOXOXO

4 Comments
Filed Under: UncategorizedTagged: animals, carpe diem, chickens, farm like, friday 5, friday 5 at the farm, Joy, Klaus

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Hi! I'm Marie. Welcome to the Lazy W. xoxo

Hi! I’m Marie. This is the Lazy W.

A hobby farming, book reading, coffee drinking, romance having, miles running girl in Oklahoma. Soaking up the particular beauty of every day. Blogging on the side. Welcome to the Lazy W!

I Believe Strongly in the Power of Gratitude & Joy Seeking

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