Lazy W Marie

Carpeing all the diems in semi-rural Oklahoma...xoxo

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Self Loathing Not Groovy

September 6, 2011

   
Check out the source of this wonderful artwork. Also directed there through Pinterest.
   What is it about words attributed to Albert Einstein that make me sit up straight and listen?  He is more likely to grab my attention than a bizarre hybrid of E. F. Hutton, Martha Stewart, and Jillian Michaels.
   Maybe it’s the fact that he’s touted as not only an intellectual genius but also a philosopher, humanitarian, lover of women, avid bicyclist, creative thinker, etc.  He was a well rounded (if slightly wacky) human being who seemed to have a knack for cutting to the quick of a body of knowledge and finding the essential truth hidden within.  The reasons why certain facts matter in the universe.  I mean, even people who will never study out Relativity can find a way to thread it into a world view.
   Okay, so apparently I feel the need to justify my affinity for Einstein wisdom.  It’s not like we’re quoting gospel here, or even Chuck Norris, and it’s not like I can personally verify that old Alberto even said any of the stuff I regurgitate.  There is plenty of room here for both debate and criticism, as always.  But still, he was smart, man.  Like, Jeopardy smart.
   Okay.
  Anyway I discovered the poster above on my favorite new eye candy site and had to share it with you.  Maybe you’ve heard the words before, but isn’t the illustration fabulous?  It really drives home  the point that diversity is a GOOD thing and that we are meant to be OURSELVES, not someone else.  Indeed, that striving to be someone else is wasteful, futile, and perhaps even fatal.  Haven’t our parents, guidance counselors, and after-school specials been saying this, like, forever?  
   Maybe so, except that eventually we get all homogenized and template-driven again, and before long we’re playing the toxic games of comparison.  Which lead to either pride or despair, neither of which is healthy.
Found eventually on a cool blog, but first through Pinterest.
   I personally, despite all of my bohemian tendencies, fall prey to those wicked games of comparison all too often.  I have spent years hating myself for not being a college graduate, a tennis player, or a person filled with the Holy Ghost.  I have hated myself for things within my control and without, running the gamut of possible topics from higher math skills to family relationships.  
   Recently I started loathing myself for the fact that I will never be a trendy, scrap-booking, home-schooling Mom.  Heck, I’m not likely to even be a car-pooling Mom ever again.  That SUCKS, and it makes me hate myself a lot.
  Over the years I have frequently questioned whether anything was left in me that couldn’t be found in other people, and WAY, WAY BETTER.*  You know something?  All of this dark thinking is startlingly universal.  We can all find reasons to detest the people we were born to be or have become.
   Even in small doses, this kind of mindset is incredibly poisonous.  Aiming our thoughts and the undercurrent of our imaginations toward what others are accomplishing and how we seem to fall short will definitely affect the momentum of life.  We may escape saturated despair, if we’re lucky, but our passion is unavoidably diluted.  Our potential is stunted by having siphoned off energy and creativity and love in favor of feelings of either inadequacy or superiority.  Again, I assert that these two sentiments are equally destructive.  They are opposite symptoms of the same ailment.
   What’s the absolute minimum fallout?  Oceans of missed opportunities.  Untold discoveries and eurekas missed because we are so busy seeking after someone else’s destiny that we neglect our own.  
   Even in efforts to distinguish ourselves, we can fall short.  We look for examples of what to do and how to do it rather than striking out and doing something that is from the wellspring of our own souls.  And yes, granted, our souls or personalities are composites of our accumulated experiences, but no two lives are identical!  Whatever similarities we discover in each other, how ever much common ground we tread, diversity and uniqueness pervade the human condition, it is MEANT to be that way, and I really really really wish we would all stop overlooking that.
   Right now, if Handsome is reading this, he’s thinking, “Then stop reading Pinterest and that one blog about the cowboy’s wife who cooks other people’s recipes that you know drives me insane in the membrane!  Be yourself!”  
    He’s so crazy.  Doesn’t he know by now that I’m a hypocrite?  
   This weekend a good friend of mine said it so perfectly, though in jest:  “I wanna be unique just like everybody else!” Seems like the context then was copycatting teenagers who wear jelly sandals, but really full grown women do it too.  And men.  Copy each other, not wear jellies.  Although they did make a brief comeback two years ago.
   So the next time you start to notice a difference between you and someone you admire and you feel like scraping your inferior forehead against a concrete brick, instead shrug your capable shoulders and say to your heart, “True Dat.”  And smile.  Because you are meant to be different.  You are meant to be you.  So get to being that, because the universe is counting on it.  We’ve been waiting on YOU long enough.
xoxoxo
* This is no way a cry for help or a solicitation for affirming words, just a perspective-rich observation of my own life, offered up for your examination.  Things are pretty groovy these days, and I know that even if I am never again a traditional lunch box-packing, home work-checking Mom, what remains is what is eternal.  What remains, as always, is love.

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Filed Under: thinky stuff

Joy Pockets Tres

September 2, 2011

   We’ve had a particularly busy, happy, productive week at the farm.  Even more so this week than most, probably.  I am so pleased to close up shop today with a few projects finally in the “done” compartment in my crowded mind, although I am stunned to realize that these whirlwind five days have suddenly brought us to almost dinner time on Friday.  My Joy Pockets are easy to count, as always.  For this I am so thankful.
  • We’ve been celebrating Handsome’s 36th birthday all week long, and we have had some serious fun doing so.  We are blessed with abundant freedom in our adulthood, incredible friends, and a good appetite for fun.  I hope he has had as much fun on his birthday this year as I have.  
  • Earlier this week I received an early morning phone call from my beautiful Momma, whose voice, affection, and laughter brighten my day like freshly squeezed lemon juice.  I realize that not all of my friends have their mothers still in their lives, and mine happens to be a very special woman, so I am doubly blessed in that respect.
  • We are thrilled to be sharing our home with friends for a few days, my blogging buddy The M Half and her Hubs, who happens to be an old school friend of Handsome’s, and their sweet and vivacious pup Rue.  (It may or may not surprise you to learn that she and I are writing in the same room at this moment, resisting the feathery advances of Pacino the Macaw.)  Last night we had the best time while our men and some other old friends played catch up on all the years lost.  We laughed until our faces hurt, we soaked up the vibes of friendship that has matured with adulthood rather than dissipated, and we got to see everyone in a slightly younger light.  Through the lens of teen years from back when we didn’t know each other, and that was cool as beans.
  • My transplanted tomatoes are thriving, and the pink roses are blooming again.  We’re still in a drought and heat wave here in Oklahoma, but early morning well water is doing the trick for now.  And our weather forecast has us anticipating a twenty-degree cool down in just a week.  That, friends, deserves to be on Joy Pockets ahead of time.
  • I am between book club assignments and also finished with previous reads, so this week and next I am indulging in a brand new author and a story about (big shocker) writing.

Look for a Review Next Week
 

  • I mixed and have been feasting on Roasted Olive Dip.
  • I got to hold an eight week old (human) baby for whom I am not even one bit responsible.  I got to sniff him and cuddle him and make him grin tiny baby grins.  I propped up his beautiful, wobbly head, sewed him a little shirt, kissed him good bye, and felt not even one scrap of longing for new motherhood.  It was a stand alone pleasure.  
  • A short list of sewing orders, which I had allowed to vex both my mind and my promises list, which affects my relationships, is now completed.  The relief of having these done and having happy customers cannot be overstated.
   This week sped by too quickly to savor properly in the moment, but looking back I see there is plenty (way more than I have shared here) to savor after the fact.  It was a week well spent and one that will fuel the coming weeks very nicely.  No complaints.
   

joy pockets

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Roasted Olive Dip

September 2, 2011

   Company is coming!!!  We’re having a little dinner party, and I want to have this cold cheese dip ready technically as an appetizer but truly so I can snack indulgently all day leading up to the fun gathering.

   About halfway through making this exceedingly simple yet exceedingly decadent appetizer, I thought maybe someone else might want to know about this and make it.  We are, after all, fast approaching Labor Day weekend, a great time to roll out a snazzy new recipe.  This qualifies as snazzy in my book.

   You only need a handful of things from the grocery store and about half an hour in the kitchen plus a day or so to let the stuff meld its flavors in the fridge.  It makes you feel a little fancy to serve this, a  little bit gypsy or something.  Now while these ingredients are a bit pricey for one finished edible item, do try to factor in how far this goes.  One recipe will feed several people for two days or one very gluttonous girl for a week.  
What You Need:
   about two cups total of at least two flavors of olives (I use pimento-stuffed green olives and pitted ripe olives)
   a few Tablespoons of Italian dressing
   3 bricks of cream cheese (8 ounces each)
   2 small buckets of feta cheese (drained)
   dash or three of your favorite hot sauce
   a few shakes of garlic salt
What You Do:

  • First, let all of the cheeses come to room temperature.  Have you ever tried to stir cold cream cheese?  Nobody should be that strong.
  • In a 400-degree oven, roast the olives in a coating of Italian dressing, for about 20 minutes.  This smells incredible.
  • Once they are all roasty and tender and shriveled, pull them out and let them cool a bit.
  • Now coarsely chop the little gems and set them aside.
  • As thoroughly as possible, mix together all the cheeses and season with hot sauce and garlic salt, to taste.
Yeah, I use cheap seasonings sometimes.  So what?
  • Now just add the chopped, roasted olives.  It looks like edible confetti.  I swear, it makes me so happy.  And Handsome doesn’t have to worry about finding this particular confetti under the seat cushions or inside the fireplace.  Or in his hair.  Or in the buffalo’s hair.  Because we eat this confetti.  At Least I do…

   That’s about it!  Now I would place a sheet of waxed paper over the top, wrap it up in plastic like your life depends on it and abandon the fruits of your labor to the cold fridge overnight.  Serve this manna with crackers or just a spoon.  It is so good.

P.S.  This is what a pimento looks like when it’s about to explode.

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Our Fave Chocolate Cake

August 29, 2011

   I suppose chocolate cake is one of those things that, barring an allergy or something, everyone craves now and then.  Around this house, Handsome requests it infrequently because it is so very, very rich.  When he does, though, it is with much insistence.  And it is a request that can only be filled with one recipe.  Never a boxed mix, and never with any deviations.  We had it this weekend to kick off his birthday week celebrations, and it was a grand success.  : )
   In addition to my man’s great appreciation of this recipe, which is enough to get me fixing it any time, we discovered early in our marriage that each of our families had been preparing it for generations!  This particular chocolate cake is one of the precious things that we held in common between our unique childhoods. That makes it double special.  Triple special.  Quadruple special.  
   My Momma got it from my Grandma, who I think received it from her mother in law.  Handsome’s Grandma Goldie made it all throughout his childhood, some say using cooked brown beans, a trick I have GOT to figure out, and I can only imagine how many generations back her cooking traditions stretch.  She was a beloved woman and famed home cook.
Here it is.
First, if you don’t have buttermilk, make some.  To one tablespoon of either vinegar or lemon juice, add enough whole milk to make a cup, and do try to measure better than I did.  Let it sit while you do other awesome kitchen stuff, so it will thicken up.  Presto, pretend buttermilk.  You’re ready for the rest.
Batter:  Make this in three parts. 
Whisk together 2 cups each of flour and sugar.  
In a saucepan, boil together these things:
   2 sticks butter
   3 1/2 Tablespoons cocoa 
   1 cup water
Then add that to the dry mixture and also add these things:
   1/2 cup buttermilk
   2 whole eggs
   1 teaspoon baking soda
   1 teaspoon vanilla 
Stir it with a wooden spoon till really really really smooth and satiny and gorgeous.
Pour this chocolaty blend into a buttered 9 x 13 baking dish.  Bake it at 400 degrees for about 20 minutes.
About ten minutes in, which is also ten minutes before the cake comes out, because ten is halfway between zero and twenty, prepare the fudge topping:
Sift a pound of confectioner’s sugar, which is about 4 cups.  Mom pointed out that sifting is key because otherwise you might have a hard time getting the final fudge mixture smooth enough.  She’s right.  Thanks Mom!  xoxo
Using the same pan as earlier, no need to wash it, cook these things:
   1 stick butter
   3 Tablespoons cocoa
   6 Tablespoons milk
Cook the fudge just to the boiling point.  Then remove from heat and add to a heat proof bowl of sifted powdered sugar.  Stir it like there’s no tomorrow and do not count the number of times that you absolutely must lick your fingers.
Now pour the hot, sugary fudge over the hot cake, tilt or spread it gently around, and let it relax at room temperature.  
   The final product should present a beautiful, shiny skin that is almost juicy when you sink your teeth into it.  This incomparable cake is super served with french vanilla ice cream and also incredible served cold.   Not too shabby when nibbled on the sly in the middle of the night, just walking by.
   How good does your house smell now?  You are welcome, and see you at the gym, baby.
Happy Birthday Week to Handsome!
xoxoxo

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Filed Under: recipes

Joy Pockets #2

August 26, 2011

The past seven days have been emotional and busy on every front,
and midweek I thought I would just skip Joy Pockets
altogether because it would just feel phony.
Thankfully, mercifully, legitimate joy
burned through that fog pretty quickly.

1.  Drive In:  Going to the old-fashioned triple-feature drive in movies with Handsome and seeing a comet at dusk.  The flicks showing that night were all really good, too, and I stayed awake through to the end.  First time ever in my life.

2.  Naptime:  Falling asleep outside in the sunshine and waking up to our biggest horse nuzzling my bare feet with his whiskery, velvety face.  He sniffed my calves and looked at me super cute, probably wondering if I was dead.  That happened twice this week, and it was downright magical.  It gave me the feeling of cuddling with a baby.  A 1200-pound baby, but still.
3.  Lake Fun:  Playing at the lake with two cool and awesome friends last Saturday afternoon.  Eating too big of a hamburger at the dockside restaurant but then burning it off just by laughing like a crazy person.  Riding the wave runner until we were out of gas on the water.  Literally.  And then the girl half of those friends taking multiple photos of together, sensing my apprehension, and her having mercy by N-O-T putting them on Facebook, because she is very pretty and I take very weird posed face pictures for some reason.

4.  Affection:  Hearing a beloved young nephew call us by name using also our titles, “Aunt” and “Uncle.”  For some reason, this gesture in his sweet little boy voice melted my heart.
5.  Victory Over Myself:  Returning a very tall stack of borrowed books to the library E-X-A-C-T-L-Y on time and retrieving a reserved book there, which is now in danger of premature completion.  This never happens, folks, not the timely return thing.  I felt like a total celebrity walking in and out of the library with nary a dime of a fine.  Why wasn’t there confetti?  Handsome is worried my lack of fines contribution may lead to downsizing.  He asked if the main librarian is having to send her car back to the dealership.

6.  Surprise:  Learning that my Dad reads my silly blog.
 
7.  Avoidance:  Delaying a dreaded dentist appointment.  Again.  I am joyful over this.
8.  Birthday Week:  Firming up R-E-A-L-L-Y  F-U-N plans for Handsome’s birthday which is in exactly two days.  We do full birthday weeks around here, so we have much celebration pending.  He is a great guy who deserves great things, more than I can provide.  He is my dream come true, and I wish him the happiest, funnest, most relaxing and exciting birthday week ever!
   Big *Thank You* to Bohemian Twilight for having this in place.
Knowing the Friday link-up was fast approaching had to have helped with the fog.
XOXOXOXO
Happy Weekend Everyone!
joy pockets

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Filed Under: joy pockets

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Hi! I'm Marie. Welcome to the Lazy W. xoxo

Hi! I’m Marie. This is the Lazy W.

A hobby farming, book reading, coffee drinking, romance having, miles running girl in Oklahoma. Soaking up the particular beauty of every day. Blogging on the side. Welcome to the Lazy W!

I Believe Strongly in the Power of Gratitude & Joy Seeking

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