Lazy W Marie

Carpeing all the diems in semi-rural Oklahoma...xoxo

You are here: Home / Home

December is Beautiful, Be Sweet

   Happy December you awesome people! Did you have a good weekend? Are you even more in the thick of Christmas preparations than last time I asked you? Things at the Lazy W are just as simultaneously hectic and restful as ever. I am hitting a daily stride around here that is deeply satisfying, so much so that maybe one day I should try to write it. It’s a thrilling awareness.

   Anyway. 
   As our seasonal decorations evolve from autumnal to sparkly, and as we accumulate special gifts for loved ones and indulgent desserts and appetizers for all of the holiday parties headed our way, I am happy to have a moment of pause. This year I am thinking of the Christian reasons to celebrate, of course, but also of the pagan traditions that have carried over into modern culture. Maybe it’s Oklahoma’s changing weather patterns that have me feeling all contemplative… Or maybe it’s the fact that this year I have more friends than ever who don’t particularly subscribe to a rigid Christian label. Or maybe it’s that in two days I will trepidatiously get my first spray tan thanks to a bottom-dollar coupon on Living Social I bought a thousand years ago. Whatever the cause, I am simmering in thoughtfulness about why we do the wintry-Christmassy things we do.
   I don’t have too giant of a message with this you guys, only a little reminder and encouragement to go ahead and celebrate things your way, according to your own heart. Pull out all the stops! But don’t waste precious time and energy criticizing how others celebrate. Or how they don’t. The things we do are supposed to be joyful and loving, life-affirming acts, not critical and obligatory and demeaning to others. Or to yourself. And certainly, traditions are at their best when they are upheld deliberately and lovingly. Don’t you agree?
“We have just enough religion to make us hate,
but not enough to make us love one another.”
~Johnathon Swift
   So if you have a friend or neighbor who decorates a tree but doesn’t use an Advent wreath or nativity scene, relax. There is still enough Christmas cheer for everyone. And if you are one of those sweet souls who  cringes at this time of year because of the inevitable religious guilt trips, despair not. True Love isn’t about that. Go ahead and keep your personal winter traditions, whatever they are. Let them bind you to your past and comfort you for your present. And everyone come to the lazy W for some hot chocolate by the fire! If this winds ever dies down we will be open for bonfiring business. And Christmas caroling. Because these are some of my traditions.
Live lovingly and 
Wish Me Luck with my Spray Tan!
xoxoxoxo
   
   

Diamonds, Dreams, and Worry Doors

   My morning coffee is often the perfect time to browse through inspirational quotes and essays, opening my mind and heart to those morsels of wisdom that just click into some struggle happening within me. Today offered such a moment of serendipity, and I’d like to share it with you. I hope you’ll join the conversation.

“You rush from room to room 
hunting for the diamond necklace
already around your neck.” ~Rumi

   It floors me. How common is this? With such enormous appetites for everything from food to material luxuries and even friendships or romance, how often are we chasing after more than we need, or how often do we fail to notice dreams that have already come true? I know I am guilty of this from time to time. And not just when we frequent the Friday Night country auction, though that is a great example. I mean, I don’t care what Pinterest says… A person only needs so many rusted antique milk cans or empty wooden frames that want to be painted turquoise…

   We can accumulate more than we need in many areas of life, continuing to pursue duplicates or poor imitations of treasures already at our feet.

   Handsome and I watched a news segment this morning about a pink diamond ring being auctioned off for charity, at a ridiculous value. The female news anchors, doing their jobs, oohed and ahhed over the sparkly bauble then took turns trying it on. They each slipped it on their wedding ring fingers where beautiful diamond rings already sat. This really bothered me, that a woman would put another diamond ring where her wedding ring sits, just because the second ring is pretty. To each her own, but really. To me, that speaks volumes.

   Then about ten minutes later I read the above quote from Rumi, and it lept off the page. Err, phone screen.

   I am not looking for diamond rings, by the way. That was just an interesting coincidence. But this does remind me of a sparkly wrap bracelet I bought about a year and a half ago on a frivolous shopping trip with my friend Marci. It is missing about a third of its stones but is so pretty, and so odd, that I wear it all the time. It cost like nine bucks.

I think this is a necklace, but I usually wrap it a few times around my wrist.

   Anyway, to add yet another layer of coincidence, Marci happened to called me out of the blue yesterday with some of the most encouraging words I have heard in a long time.

   Read into this as much or as little as suits you, but for me I am taking all of this as a big, happy clue to examine my yearnings. Do you remember the Worry Door story, and how it is supposed to be closed tight, forever?  What phantoms do I still allow to creep up and and terrify me, and what dreams am I still chasing frantically, that perhaps have already come true?

Thrifty stuff update: That painting now sits on my writing desk upstairs in the Apartment;
that gray & white tiered stand has served about three hundred cookies by now;
and those paper white bulbs are finally planted and proudly displaying three inch green sprouts! 

   I have this slightly weird belief that some prayers can be answered in advance, at a far distance; they just take a little time to become visible. That is when faith bridges the distance, the waiting period.

   That is when I have to trust that the diamond necklace I am hunting in every room is already around my neck. Or my wrist. So I just close my eyes and imagine it. And give thanks for it. And stop hunting. And allow the Worry Door to remain closed.

   What phantoms chase you around, trying to terrify you and fling open your Worry Door? Let it stay closed, man. What dream are you pursuing, hunting like a diamond necklace in every room? Perhaps it is already around your neck.Or your wrist. I’m not suggesting that worry has no place in life, or that we should stop dreaming big dreams. Just that sometimes it’s good to stop and notice how abundantly blessed we already are, and how many treasures already belong to us.

Be Happy.
And if You Have a Friend Like Marci, 
Give Her a Hug.
xoxoxo

A Few Animal Updates

1.   The llama was skunked last night. Or this morning. Or this afternoon. Or possibly all three, judging from his stench, which I caught on a stiff breeze while photographing him today. His pasture-mates are clean as whistles, though, so hopefully this means that Sir Romulus has finally accepted his role as varmint-dismisser. I absolutely swell with pride to imagine him scooping his long, noodly neck really low and trotting aggressively after a black-and-white intruder. Good boy, Romulus. Good, stinky, untouchable boy.

I can’t even cope with how beautiful his eyes are.

2.   The chickens still have not provided me any more eggs. Well, I have collected exactly ONE EGG this week. If by some chance you have been watching my little egg counter on the sidebar over there and wondered if I have just forgotten to update it… No. Just no eggs. Do you know how embarrassing it is to buy a carton of  snow white eggs at the grocery store? I feel like such a fraud. Like everyone there knows. Watching me examine eggs as if I have a choice. Judging me. Calculating in their heads how much money I have wasted on chicken scratch this month. Anyway, the feathery ladies do not appear to be molting; they have plenty of sunshine and fresh water; and only two roosters are around to “bother” them. Hubba hubba. So I know in my calcium-deprived bones that a giant clutch of eggs is somewhere on these nine acres. Somewhere. Not in the barn or the coop, but somewhere I will find them. Eventually. Or I will find a little nursery school of fresh baby chicks, which are only slightly less delicious.

An old photo, from more productive days…

3.   But Mia’s love is still going strong. I sat in the sunny front yard today and fed him and his downy compadres a bag of stale bread, and he cuddled and honked me properly. I happened to be listening to music via headphones at the time, though, and apparently he objected to this. He started pecking at my head and really zeroed in on my headphones, almost in perfect beat to Ice Ice Baby which is the song that was playing at the time. The thing is, Mia is simply too young to appreciate fake rap from that era.

Stop! Collaborate and Listen! Mia’s back!

4.   My friend, neighbor, and fellow book clubber Seri surprised me today with a tray of made-from-scratch sweet potato biscuits! You guys, they are so good. So soft and pillowy and sweet, just the exact thing I needed for an afternoon pick-me-up. But I tore off a little corner and offered it to Chunk-Hi and he not very politely refused. He really likes crunchy treats, we should always try to remember. Oh well, more for me. Thanks Seri!

Crunchy stuff only, please, Momma.

5.   Our parrot, Bobby Pacino, is not only learning new words lately; he is also assembling his growing vocabulary in terrifying fascinating ways. I knew it was coming, because in the days leading up to a burst of new words and phrases, Pacino always sits quietly on his perch, eyes lowered, one claw massaging his throat. I really need to write down every single thing he can say, because it’s pretty impressive. This week his new thing is “I don’t appreciate it, OK?” We’ve heard worse from him, unfortunately, but for some reason this sentence just cracks me up. The thing is, he says it with such appropriate disgust. His inflection, you guys, is spot on.

Someone told me… If you have a parrot 
and you aren’t teaching him to say
“Help! They changed me into a parrot!”
Then you’re wasting your time.

Oblah-Di, Oblah-Dah!
xoxoxoxo
 

My Next Big Thing (sort of a link up)

   Do you remember back in October when our Dinner Club With a Reading Problem welcomed Tulsa author Jen Luitwieler to discuss her book Run With Me? Well, perhaps I haven’t impressed this on you enough, but she is still on my radar. In kind of a big, inspirational way. She is in the publishing stages of her second book, an historical novel based in Tulsa, Oklahoma, and she is also finishing up the rough draft of her third book as part of National Novel Writing Month (NaNoWriMo). 
   NaNoWriMo is staged annually for the month of November, during which time writers are pushed, prodded, and propelled to flesh out just the rough drafts of their imagined novels. 
   Somewhere along the way I got sassy enough to tell Jen and Margi (The M Half) and a few other supportive people that I intended to participate. 
   And finish.
   LOL
   Anyway, Jen has graciously invited both Margi and me to share our answers to these questions about our soon-to-be-novels. You can click around to see Jen’s answers, her friend Mitchell Allen’s answers, and more, all over the inter-webs. Here we go with my own!
What is the working title of your book? Louisiana Treasure This is actually just how I have it titled on my desktop. I doubt very much it will stay.
Where did the idea come from for the book? This past summer, while driving home from a particularly lush and inspirational trip to Louisiana, I was scribbling down my immediate memories and descriptions of the scenery and was also taking inventory of how homesick I always feel for this placed I have never lived. So I decided it had to be memorialized somehow. Also, Handsome has been encouraging me for some time to sit down and write something. Plus I have this idea of being wealthy beyond reason just from writing, so that my husband can retire early and I can give my children anything they need and help our parents retire comfortably and go play either in the French Quarter or at a beach once a month.
What genre does your book fall under? Either simple literary fiction or maybe mystery.
Which actors would you choose to play your characters in a movie rendition? I am a big fan of Eva Mendes for the lead female character, and that’s as far as I’ve gotten. I just now officially spent more time googling and trying to remember this certain guy’s name than I have spent writing today, so that little detail will have to just work itself out.
What is the one-sentence synopsis of your book? A young woman inherits from her eccentric Great-Aunt a sizable fortune but with it the burden of distributing to her disconnected and far flung family members some odd possessions which slowly reveal a pattern filled with dark implications; and along the way she learns about herself and her family and has a sexy, tumultuous love affair with more than one person, plus she has a lot of fun not being poor.
Will your book be self-published or represented by an agency? Whichever gets me to the beach first.
How long did it take you to write the first draft of your manuscript? I pretty much wrote the whole thing this morning. Almost done. Wait, I might need two more weeks.
What other books would you compare this story to within your genre? Hhhmmm .. I’d say this will eventually polish out to be a cross between Moby Dick, Fried Green Tomatoes, and The Stand. With a touch of 50 Shades.
Who or What inspired you to write this book? The details of Louisiana’s beauty and mood combined with the complexity of a woman’s heart provide oceans of writing material. Period.
What else about your book might pique the reader’s interest? It will include plenty of romance and even sex, because it’s attempting to be about real people. 

********************


   So there ya go! I am actually doing this, although I will not be done as soon as many of the other writers. Thank you, Jen, for inviting me to the Q & A party! That was super fun. 

You Know What They Say  About 
All Work and No Play…
xoxoxoxo

Grateful Holiday Launch 2012

   Whew! What a Thanksgiving! How was yours? Are you exhausted? Exhilarated? Are you so full of decadent food that you now want nothing but Greek yogurt, salad without dressing, apples, and chicken breasts? Is your house weeping for a good scrub, or is it already shining and sparkling with Christmas? I am somewhere in the middle of all of that good stuff, and happily so. Today I get to clean and decorate the house, run a thousand miles and do yoga, make Christmas cards from scratch, cook something healthy, sew nine aprons to sell, then read and review two books.

   I should do approximately all of that, 
before Handsome gets home from the Commish. 
In my dreams.

   My Thanksgiving weekend started with a long, wonderful Wednesday spent with my youngest daughter Jessica. Words cannot relay how refreshing it is to be alone with her, to catch up on her life and her heart, for her voice to fill the room and her arms to wrap around me. We had a girlish meal of hot tea from an antique strawberry tea pot, English muffins with local honey, peppered bacon, and fresh pears and oranges. Feeding her food we both love fed my soul much more than my body. I watched her with the animals, and she is the same as ever. Sweet and confident. I watched her walk across the room, though, and she is suddenly a young woman.

I love this photo so much. Jess named this bee Fred when it landed on her glove, 
and she seemed to thrill at the sound of the buzzing as much as I do.

   She suited up and helped me inspect the bee hives (good news/ bad news there; more on that tomorrow), proving her sweet spirit with every slow, steady movement. Saying goodbye at the and of the afternoon was painful, always more difficult than I show, and I think she would say the same. But I am deeply grateful for those hours together and for the rest it gives me to reconnect with her. I love her and her big sister so much, so constantly, that words fail me here every time.

   That evening Handsome and I attended another Thunder basketball game and screamed our lungs out! It was a close contest from beginning to end which culminated in an overtime victory for our beloved OKC team. So. Much. Fun. And such a great way to release tension!

   Watching the games on TV is great, but the entertainment value of a game there at the arena is in its own category of awesome. The music, the lights, the crowd’s energy, the wildness and civic affection of it all, is just unbeatable in my opinion. And the fact that we have a basketball team whose sportsmanship and skill kind of blows everyone else out of the water? Wow. So yes, the two of us are extremely thankful for the gift of game tickets so frequently. What fun!

   After some crazy late night grocery shopping on Wednesday, Handsome and I luxuriated Thursday morning then spent many long, carb-filled hours divided between his parents’ house and mine. We laughed with a fraction of our siblings (not everyone lives nearby or could travel this year). We played with nieces and nephews. We made plans to see lots of them next summer. Mostly, I think, we enjoyed seeing our parents happy and busy. It is a blessing not lost on us that we both have our parents alive and well and present in out lives. We love them all so very much and are grateful for all of the work and love that they poured into giving us a happy Thanksgiving!

   We had planned for house guests at the end of the week, but last minute changes left us with a clean, empty Apartment, so we did more luxuriating with each other at our own end of the house… Then a leaking hot water tank changed our plans again and some necessary Black Friday shopping for a major appliance tested our holiday resolve. Happily, we passed the test. I even bought poinsettias.

   Friday night both sides of our family gathered at the farm for a bonfire, some leftovers, pizza, and roasted marshmallows. I am still so thrilled that we can invite both of our families here and everyone blends in and has a great time together! This is a big source of joy for me, and I also appreciate that everyone is happy to bring treats to share. Watching children from both families play together and make memories warms me up.

   I think it’s just perfect that in the United State we celebrate Thanksgiving immediately before the onslaught of Christmas and all of the materialism and consumption that inevitably comes with it. This week I have stopped several times to be actively Thankful, to record my blessings either on paper (the spiral mandala) or on a chalkboard we have screwed to the wall of our stairwell. The chalkboard is a leftover from Brian and Rebecca’s wedding back in May, and we use it for all sorts of things now.

   Friday night our families helped fill it up with some really happy graffiti of thanks, and I gotta say… eventually erasing this communal masterpiece will be difficult. I predict these words and scribbles will be up for many weeks. Here is a list of what I found there:

  • romance
  • laughter  Laughter is so powerful.
  • sleep
  • happy marriage
  • my babies
  • my home
  • family
  • darling
  • family
  • Brandy & Marie  Okay, who wrote this one? Are you jockeying for an awesome Christmas gift? Because it’s totally working.
  • love
  • Mom
  • good jobs
  • life
  • time to play
  • God
  • …and his love for us 
  • our parents
  • home
  • marriage
  • bills paid
  • happiness
  • life
  • pets  Between the households just represented that night, I bet we have easily over a hundred pets. 
  • good books
  • art supplies
  • Matthew
  • healthy children  Amen, amen, amen. Whatever our other struggles, having healthy children is a blessing we should never stop appreciating!
  • friends
  • Matt I am growing a little suspicious of this now…
  • life
  • family
  • Amy
  • the right to bear arms  We are in Oklahoma, after all, where the open carry law just passed, and several of our family members are law enforcement. No surprise at this little celebration.
  • family

   Just look at how often different people mentioned marriage, family, home, and friends. We are obviously thankful for whatever brings love and security. We prize these above so many other things, even as wealthy and indulgent as we are. This floors me and motivates me all at once! Does it you?

********************

   So… Happy last week of November to you all! I hope you are off and running in your own beautiful ways to a memorable holiday season. I hope you take time to focus on the things for which you and your loved ones are truly thankful, and build on those rather than bleed your energies out toward things that don’t really matter. Pray for each other. Pray for my sister if you can. Dwell on beauty and possibility every chance you get.

   If I accomplish my crazy Monday Tasks list in time, I will be back tomorrow to discuss our Lazy W bee situation and maybe sell you some aprons. Have yourself a fantastic day!!

“We can only be said to be alive in those moments
when our hearts are conscious of our treasures.”
~Thornton Wilder
xoxoxoxo