How grows your garden so far? Is your corner of the universe lending you regular sky showers and plenty of warm, windless days to sow your seeds? Our new raised beds have been like a playground for me this month. Clean, level, and packed with compost and black soil, they draw me out every morning and seduce me into slipping just one more herb or just one more packet of seeds into an empty space. At last count I had nestled almost twenty squash plants in the dirt out there and almost that many peppers and tomatoes. It’s a numbers game, you guys.

   We also now have a bed jam packed with what will become edamame, thanks to a gift from our neighbor Robby, and we are celebrating the rise of the green bean tipi. But you know what? Some of what I have been doing in the garden this past week is sort of against regulation. Oklahoma is smack in the middle of a waning moon, which means I should have been focusing more on weed removal and soil cultivation than the installation of above ground crops. The thing is, I lack willpower.

      Things are growing steadily and with few obstacles, and more importantly Rebecca’s wedding is just a few days from now; so the temptation to plant new stuff is just too strong to resist! The photo above, though, is actually an old clematis vine. One which I believed to have perished in last year’s heat wave. But look! Just like the abandoned, rusty blue bike from the Pine Forest, she made a comeback! When I look at this pairing I see three months into the future, when that misshapen front wheel is draped lavishly with green vines and heavy blossoms. And then I go plant some more seeds.

   Before we all go scoot to our Tuesday chores and appointments, will you be kind as to cast a vote? Yesterday I collected lots of normal chicken eggs… and then the behemoth egg you see on the right in this photo. It is heavy, folks. And I have yet to crack it open to see its contents, but it could be a goose egg. Before you vote, here are some facts:

• This giant egg was found in the same nesting box as six average sized hen eggs.
• That nesting box is about three feet off the ground, inside the chicken coop.
• The geese have in fact been sleeping in the coop lately, but…
• Momma Goose is, well, she’s just not athletic.
• But seriously, that is a big egg. And it is as heavy as a brick, no kidding.

   You might remember that Tracy accompanied me to that first bee class back in March. She is always up for a new experience! Here she is again, cheerfully painting this field of flowers, which I immediately loved to pieces. To my eye, her abstract blooms resemble Coreopsis, poppies, and gladiolus. Wouldn’t it would make a great stationery set?


   I did not realize the day of our painting fun that Tracy’s birthday was right around the corner! Happy Birthday, sweet woman! You are setting such an incredible example for your kids, feeding that happy appetite for life.

   Can you even believe how sweet and bright these girls are? By the way, Lauren is Tracy’s youngest and Haley is Lauren’s friend. They are sheer joy to be around! Well mannered, protective of the little kids, and just plain happy. When all the bee art was complete and they had each made a tie-dye shirt, these girls dove right in and helped with wedding prep! Thank you ladies.

   Our Lazy W ranch brand!! Thank you Mysti, this is so darn cool as beans. Now if we could only figure out how to get the brand of each of our tiny little bees…

   I went outside early this morning in flip flops instead of rubber boots and zipped through a handful of chores, eager to get to the good stuff. I took with me a giant mug of hot, perfectly delicious coffee and thought about how much opportunity is at our feet.

   The sky was golden-blue and already very warm, the breeze was mild compared to yesterday’s gustiness, and the animals were all bright eyed and affectionate. I felt life pulsing happily all around me and had love seeping out of my skin. These are the perfect conditions for flip flops.

   Do you know what I found when I walked downhill and into the veggie garden?

  Well hello there dahlings… I am sustaining the nasty habit of writing only once or twice a week, mostly because this is a busy time of year and lots of lots of worthwhile tasks are keeping my attention all day every day. In addition to sewing orders and normal housework and animal stuff, the garden has been a big energy consumer. In a wonderful, happy way, though.

   Most days I wake up wondering what has happened while I slept and what the weather will be that day. Will it allow me to dig, or should I sow? Is it a day for weeding, and have those morning glory seeds split open yet so I can plant them? Or will the chickens just eat them? Are moon flowers toxic to horses? And what the heck am I going to do about that weirdly thick rose bush our front? What did those salvia fail? Wait, it’s a waning moon right now… what does that mean again? Is it already too late for cilantro? My gosh I miss the smell of basil. It’s gonna be such a good year for squash. I hope someone will go fishing for me so I can get those fish heads for the corn. These are some of the three and a half million thoughts that swarm my brain every morning on my way downstairs for that first heavenly cup of steaming hot coffee.

   The potagerie is on track so far. All four raised beds are sturdy and, dare I say, quite attractive. Three of them have been filled lasagna style with alternating layers of dried leaves, chicken litter, horse manure, and finally some beautiful top soil we had dumped here last week. Two of those filled beds have now been planted. And, unbelievably, the chickens are minding their manners. The only seedlings I have discovered kicked and scratched out of the earth are some zinnias up at the east flower bed, near the front door. Everything else has been left alone. This is reason for cautious celebration!

   By the way, you guys, this is the first time in my life I have ever written a check for dirt. DIRT. I mean, we live on nine acres, so you might think I could drum up my own dirt. But most of our property is sandy, which is barely amenable to growing the stuff we really like to eat, with the exception of melons, berries, spinach, and fruit trees. Those thrive in sand. Anyway, the dirt purchase felt weird, but it should yield us some good  edibles.

   With the weather warming up so much, the horses have been shedding like crazy. And so I have been brushing them like crazy, something that is so nice for both horse and human that it can scarcely be called a “chore.” Each of our three pasture ornaments has a certain way he or she likes to be groomed, and if you do it right you usually end up with a sleeping behemoth leaning against you. That’s kind of the paycheck for this particular task. All of them appreciate a nice lullaby, too, so I sing while I brush. Thank goodness they are not too picky about pitch, tone, or volume.

   The other day I caught myself singing Chanta a song that my human chickens used to love, too, one we sang every night at bedtime for years. Chim Chimmeree from Mary Poppins. Do you know it? It is soft and slow and sounds a little bit sad, but only until you really listen to the words… Then all of a sudden there is gentle contentment in this song, and truly it describes how I finally feel about my life, my job, my station in this world.

   Sometimes being W-2 challenged serves up a bit of an identity crisis, especially without children at home to justify my being home, at least publicly. I have friends with fascinating careers who are tempted to abandon them. Other friends have children but still crave something more. Several beautiful women in my life are ready for romance and frustrated by the games people play. We all have days when we envy other people’s situation a little bit, and possibly even feel intimidated. For example, I have so much admiration not only for homeschooling moms but also for professional women who keep it all together that sometimes I let it crush me. Then all of a sudden my joy has evaporated. Unfulfilled longings can be very painful, and we all feel that from time to time.

   This is such a waste of time and energy. Each of us plays a part in this world, and each of us has been given unmeasured gifts and blessings that are unique to our lives and our souls. In fact, I think that the same gift in one life will manifest very differently in another because of each person’s uniqueness. A deep, refreshing well of wonder can be found in learning to appreciate your own special circumstances long before anyone else appreciates it for you, regardless of whether anyone else ever does, even.

   I am not suggesting that we stop reaching for goals or blind ourselves to the possibilities of change; quite the opposite. I am suggesting that we spark change with appreciation instead of envy. Learning to savor the details of my life, evolving and unplanned though they may be, has done wonders for my heart. With that appreciation comes increased contentment, confidence, and joy! This has allowed me to be friends with women who not very long ago would have intimidated me to that point of crumbling retreat. It has allowed me to dream more freely and laugh a lot more. I wish for longer days instead of shorter ones, and lately I can pray for my children with more faith than worry. So the precipitation of learning to love your life, no matter how it may look to other people, is incredibly nourishing. Start today.

   I certainly hope for a future where I can impart this feeling and so much more to my girls. Maybe the lullaby sank into their hearts years ago and they’ll realize it along with me.

The Ladder of Life is an Illusion, Be Happy. 
xoxoxoxo


Linking up to Mama Kat, in answer to her question: What do you love most about your job?