Lazy W Marie

Carpeing all the diems in semi-rural Oklahoma...xoxo

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All You Need Is Love

   Happy Saturday! Handsome and I were up early today. (Sleeping in, if we sleep at all, has become a distant memory.) We drank coffee with his sweet Dad. We watched the molten sunlight spread into every dark crevice of the downstairs. And we sat still, observing and evaluating the gradual acquaintance of our parrot, Bobby Pacino, with one of Harvey’s little dogs, Mia. 

   Mia is a tiny, curly white speck of a dog whose ability to cuddle is unmatched. She has singlehandedly broken all my rules and preferences about indoor animals. (Pacino doesn’t count.) I’m in love, and thankfully she and the bird are becoming friends. Finally.
   As I type this (with one hand because Mia is lounging cozily on the other), we have just spent about an hour sitting in my favorite weird green velvet rocker, refereeing some face time between these two. They’re both super jealous. And they’re both super sweet about it.
   

   Y’all this is an amazing shot. If you only knew the conditions under which it was taken. I made sure to not include myself in the photo because the other day I colored my hair an unusual shade of blonde that makes me feel like the 80’s. But not in a great way. Like, I don’t recognize myself in the mirror. Think… Ellen Griswold. Ack.
   Funny timing, today I get to go to the City for a smart-phone photography class! I “won” free enrollment with a snapshot I posted to Instagram, never mind that I was the only contestant, and some wonderful book-clubber girlfriends are joining me. I will learn all I can so my photos here will be better. 
   The farm is so beautiful right now. Deep drifts of colorful leaves everywhere. Fuzzy animals. Crisp skies. I want to sit and write about it all, especially the herb garden, which changes daily. Elegantly. I adore that little space.
   Please continue to pray for Handsome, his Dad, the entire family. Finding a new normal is going to take longer than I expected, but that’s okay. Love, as always, is so powerful. 
    I’m learning so much. I’m seeing my men in a more vibrant light. Spiritual lessons are washing over me hour by hour, surprising me with new meanings. Seriously you guys, if I could get my hair right I’d feel pretty stable. 
   

      Also, this is a photo of our little buff, Chunk-hi, back when he was just a little short-horned puppy. He was still small enough to come inside the house. Not so much anymore. Time passes too quickly for my taste. But my gosh the garden looks tons better now! So does the front door. So there’s that. I just thought you might like to see it.
   That’s all the random news I have for the moment. Thank you ever so much for stopping in. I hope to have all kinds of great things to share before long.
   Much love to your corner of paradise, from my spot here in Oklahoma. Life is good, even when it hurts and shocks us. Love is the most powerful force, so use it. Choose it. Cling to it. Kiss your buffalo or your parrot or your inside dog, whatever you have. They need love too.
Nothing You Can Sing 
That Can’t Be Sung
XOXOXO
   
   

   

Judy Wreath, a Celebration of Life

Over this past weekend our family suffered a terrible loss.
Handsome’s sweet Mom, Judy Goddard Wreath,
passed away suddenly very early Saturday morning, 
and we have been reeling ever since.
Every routine, naturally, is on pause for a while 
as we tend to each other’s grief and make 
final arrangements for a truly great lady.
In the days since her passing, we have received dozens, 
perhaps hundreds, of phone calls and emails 
describing the myriad ways Judy has touched people’s lives.
It is humbling, inspiring, and comforting all at once.

Following is a small tribute to her for her loved ones to keep 
and hopefully for adding their own memories.

If you knew Judy Wreath,
then this little memorial should make you nod your head 
and maybe laugh, and maybe cry, 
and probably want to tell your own stories.
We certainly hope you join in.

If you never got the chance to know her,
I bet you’ll want to.
********************
   Judy Goddard Wreath was born to Edgar and Goldie Goddard on January 22, 1947 in Tipton, Oklahoma. She lived all her life in Oklahoma but worked hard, spread the love of God, and made lifelong friends everywhere she went.

Judy Goddard as a pretty little girl, already full of ideas and adventure.

   As a young teenager she moved to Oklahoma City with her family then graduated from Western Heights high school in 1964. She lived a full, generous life and died unexpectedly on Saturday, October 19, 2013 in her home in Moore, Oklahoma. Judy was preceded in death by her parents, by her brother Danny, and by her husband Harvey’s parents and two siblings. She is survived by a large family including one sister, cousins,  and many nieces and nephews.

They started their marriage in prayer, and they have maintained that standard.
They prayed together every morning before starting their day,
right up until they would have celebrated their fortieth anniversary this week.
   Married on the balcony of the Liberty bank tower in downtown Oklahoma City on October 21, 1973, Judy and her husband Harvey Wreath were just shy of celebrating their fortieth wedding anniversary when she passed. Their decades together exemplified marital union and teamwork  in every way possible, from how they raised their blended family to the careers they shared and the church they helped grow and pastor. Judy was truly Harvey’s right arm just as he was hers, and thinking of them apart feels unnatural to everyone who loves them.

I adore this photo, the way she is looking at her husband, my wonderful father-in-law.
I hope he always feels her love.
   Judy leaves behind her beloved husband, Harvey Wreath, three beautiful daughters and their husbands, Angela and David Anderson, Cindy and Roger Wagner, and Tyrene and Shad Turoczi; two loving sons and their wives, Eddie and Amy Wreath and Brandy and Marie Wreath; twenty-one grandchildren of whom she was so proud, Courtney and Eric Fillebaum, Nicole and Matthew Lee, Jennifer Anderson and fiancee Jordan Brandford, Amy Jo Anderson, Jami Canfield, Lacy and Joe Echelle, Tanner Wagner, Tehran and Catherine Turoczi, Haven Turoczi, Koston Turoczi, Trevor Wreath, Matthew Wreath, Samantha Wreath, Harley Bell Wreath, Jocelyn Hartley, and Jessica Hartley; and seven wonderful little great-grand children, Kylen and Holden Fillebaum, Wesley Canfield, Grant and Taryn Echelle, and Jaxson and Milani Turoczi.

   And she was called “Mom” or “Granda-girl” or “Grandma Judy” by countless other children through the years, from Sunday School students and foster kids to children she helped in her work as a police officer and child advocate.

   Judy’s love for children was matched only by her deep affection for the elderly. Her example of how to treat the Golden Generation is one we all should follow.
   The list of friends she leaves behind is long and varied, rich with love and admiration, but one friend in particular, Carolyn Schultz, was like a sister to her for most of their lives. And a cousin, David, was as much a brother to her as well.
   Judy’s professional life was as richly textured and meaningful as her personality. She worked as a bookkeeper , as an apartment complex manager (where she and Harvey first met), as business manager of Harvey’s Body Shop in Moore (where she was also known to pinstripe cars), as an organist for different churches, and much more. For more than twenty-five years, she and Harvey worked not just one but many jobs together, certainly a testament to their love and compatibility.
   Judy was a talented seamstress who never sold her creations but instead donated dress after dress to women and children in need, as well as drapes, baby blankets, and much more. She sewed for her own home and others, and she has passed on to her family that craving to create with fabric.
   Judy was a sometime street racer over the years and she loved cars, especially hot rods, but not yellow ones. But she hated motorcycles just as much and took it personally that her loved ones continued to ride them.
   Judy was active with and devoted to her children from the cradle through adulthood. She placed a high value on play and joyfulness in the home, from playing dress up and having fashion shows to painting little hot wheels or burying them in the dirt. She knew how to play and never wanted any child to go without or feel lonely.
   She was an amazing grandmother, a loyal, dedicated friend, and a tenacious fighter when necessary.  She was someone you wanted in your corner, and she had a talent for seeing through to the root of a problem or to the essence of a broken heart. She was a woman of action, not often idle worry, and the few times she couldn’t directly help you, she was right there just pouring out much needed comfort.
   Most importantly, Judy knew how to pray, and she shared that knowledge with anyone who would listen. She believed in the baptism of the Holy Spirit with the evidence of speaking in tongues (Acts 2:38). She believed in leading a good life and making an honorable name for yourself. At her death she was busy writing a book all about the power of prayer as she had seen it play out in her lifetime, while watching her own grandmother closely. The Democrat Granny Brandstatt.  She often stated that she knew miracles are real.
   Judy was quick to laugh, quick to forgive, quick to defend, extra quick to help anyone in need, and quick to gather people together for a meal. She loved to talk. So much. And her strong, feminine voice and giggle will be missed.
   No one could throw a party quite like her, whatever the occasion, and she was always happy to do it. She made every holiday memorable,  and she made every person feel important. From her trio of elegant Christmas trees and the family’s crab boil in December to Easter egg hunts in the spring and elaborate Halloween galas, Judy kept the family’s rhythm strong with rituals and traditions.
   In Harvey and Judy’s home, the grand kids ruled. The bedrooms were always decked out with fun toys, electronics, and comfortable beds, and the kitchen was always overflowing with exactly the right junk foods. Judy wanted all children to feel safe and secure, and her home was meant to be an oasis for them. This included late night movies, marshmallows in the fireplace, video game marathons, and even prayer. She always made room for everybody.
   As if all of this wasn’t enough, Judy was one of the most dazzlingly effective workers in Oklahoma’s broader political scene. Judy’s maternal grandparents were famously bipartisan, her Granny being a Democrat and her Grandpa being a Republican. This fundamental duality informed Judy’s values well, and she applied it to her political energy, often supporting Republicans but always supporting the best candidates (even if they were Democrats). At a Republican Women’s gathering she once delivered a speech saying that if her polar opposite grandparents could raise eleven kids together, then surely the state’s elected officials from both sides of the aisle could get along! Judy organized fund raisers for men and women at every level of government. She spearheaded successful grassroots campaign strategies, advised politicians, and generally impassioned people to care about what happened around them. She taught her children to respect and appreciate the political process and helped her husband gain election to the Moore City Council in 1978.
   Some of the friends she and Harvey made along this path are the late Senator Helen Cole, Congressman Tom Cole, Senator Gary Gardenhire, Governor Frank and Cathy Keating, Representative Jan Collins, Vice President Mondale, and the late Lillian Carter. Judy never took lightly her opportunities and honors, but she certainly earned every one of them. Many of us were lucky enough to ride her coattails.

Judy with Oklahoma First Lady Cathy Keating.

   Judy was a sort of self-taught politician, psychologist, counselor, attorney, custom painter, and physician. She helped people in thousands of ways, for free, all without a formal education. She researched things that interested her and allowed God to lead her, and we were all blessed by her enthusiasm.  She was always willing to tell you exactly what you needed to do, and was usually spot on, and never she never sent a bill but hoped for your love.
   One of the career paths Judy and Harvey shared was law enforcement. When Harvey was Under Sheriff at Cleveland County, she worked for him as a reserve police officer then again later at the Hallpark Police Department, where she worked as the Juvenile Officer, protecting and mentoring children. They were known to ride the streets together keeping the world safe, taking home lost children, and protecting the innocent.  She never stopped looking for the lost and she had a gift to find them. The children of Hall Park will never forget the special years of trick-or- treating with officer Judy.

Harvey and Judy in uniform together.
   When the Murrah Building was bombed in 1995, Judy worked alongside Harvey to identify victims and notify their families, both awful burdens which she carried with grace. She spent more than two weeks in the morgue under unimaginable circumstances, and all these years since she has testified repeatedly how the Holy Spirit protected and comforted her, kept her sane and happy despite the horrors. She felt honoured to protect the youngest of victims in their last hour. She has also been able to spread that sense of protection to dozens of other people, inspiring them, rescuing them in their darkest hours, pushing them toward hope and peace. This is no small thing.
   Judy was a lover of music. She enjoyed Elvis, heavy symphony music, old fashioned spirituals, and anything her Daddy played on his guitar. Her favorite song was Dream Lover by Bobby Darin. The kids always loved for her and Harvey to sing a duet of Chantilly Lace. She was a talented pianist herself and over the years has kept thousands of worship services moving with her organ music. She loved to share this love of music and secretly bought many instruments for the needy over the years.
   She had a wonderful penchant for the dramatic, which was evident in every room she decorated and every event she planned. She was a history buff and infused her surroundings with special artifacts from the past. Many of our families’ homes are filled with treasures that Mom had found that she thought we just had to have in our homes.  She loved to give so much that you couldn’t tell her something she had was pretty or she would make you take it with you.
   You could count on a Judy Wreath party to be big, beautiful, and memorable. Still, she appreciated little favors people did for her, the small welcoming gestures that made her feel loved.  She threw countless weddings for the the needy and every friend that would let her just take the reigns.  Her talents threw many birthday parties, graduation celebrations, and more. None could throw together a bigger party on a smaller budget and have people leaving in awe.
   Judy liked for women to dress their best and for little girls to be made to feel pretty. She would light up at the chance to make a wedding dress or a little flower girl fluff.  A great honor was also to make special clothing for any baby’s dedication to the Lord. She had so much fun making hundreds of Halloween costumes from clowns, to puppies, to princesses. She also loved for men to be gentlemen and for little boys to get to dress as Batman as often as they wish.

My Handsome with his sweet Momma, after his college graduation ceremony.
I have not known a more proud mother.
   The stories and descriptions about this phenomenal lady could go on and on. There is no one quite like Judy Goddard Wreath, and we all have lost more than a wife and matriarch, though she certainly was that. We have lost more than a friend and mother and grandmother, though of course she was those things too. She was a woman who knew her gifts and used them to the best of her ongoing ability in order to serve others, to make their lives better and to make hers meaningful. She was a woman who wanted more than anything to please her living God so that she could one day be called up to heaven and be reunited with so many loved ones.
   She wanted her friends and family to know how much she loved them. The only time she spoke of fear was when wondering if people loved her back.  When you are missing her and wondering what she thought of you, rest assured, if Judy Wreath knew you, she loved you.  She was a Biblical example of unconditional love.
   The vacancy she leaves will be felt more deeply with every day; but the legacy she leaves can only thrive.
   We all love you, Judy, and miss you terribly.

   And Mr. H says he’ll see you in the morning.
   xoxoxoxo

Tiny T: Introducing His Friends

L   Hey T fans! While our philanthropist gentleman digests his New Orleans breakfast, listens to the banjo and washboard, and prepares for the next leg of his journey, I thought I’d introduce you to a few of his buddies. 

   These guys are always in the wings somewhere, either encouraging T, harassing him, or tricking him out of his cool van. They may even make appearances in this love story… Who knows?
   On the far left, in the black leather jacket, is Felix. He is a womanizer if ever one walked this earth. His classic good looks and penchant for working any room against any odds always give him the frustrating advantage with ladies and business dealings alike.
   There in the middle, the elegantly aging man with the silver crew cut, is Hargis. While not always the man to walk away arm-locked with a beautiful woman, he is definitely the man with the plan. He is the alpha presence in this motley Crüe, and he knows it.
   Finally, seated, is Martin. Martin enjoys a weird stroke of genius in his character, but his numerous oddities make it difficult for T to relax around him. In fact, it’s usually Martin who causes T so many headaches and tries to swipe his van. But it’s cool.
   So there you have it! Three of the people who keep T both grounded and a bit crazy. Who are your friends who provide this blended service?
   Thanks for checking in! See you tomorrow for what happens after T’s breakfast.

Tiny T: Episode Four

   Where we left him, Tiny T had just received an empty paper sack bearing a note of apology and phone number from the brunette he’d met in the French Quarter. He was feeling homesick but pleased to know she hadn’t stood him up at the coffee shop. 
   Sometimes a person has to be ready and willing to heal himself if needed. He has to strike out and shore himself up, and often a large body of water helps. For Tiny T, the mighty Mississippi was nearby and exactly what he needed.
            Do you follow Tiny T on Instagram? You totally should.
   Then sometimes, out of the blue, we are pleasantly surprised. We just have to be watching for the messenger.
                                                         *************************
   Tiny T has lots of choices about how to proceed with his day. He needs your help! Does he send a written reply with Zane? Does he continue his run to the river bank? Does he write off this mysterious beauty, knowing she will be leaving town a few hours, and he must stay? Or something entirely different? 
   Thanks a ton for all of your comments and emails cheering Tiny T to a successful love connection! I hope you keep it up. My goal is to incorporate as many suggestions as possible. ❤ 
   Now, back to your regularly scheduled happy, restful, memory-making Saturday! Thanks for stopping by!
XOXOXOXO

Prayer Requests

   Happy Sunday morning…I hope wherever you opened your eyes today was as beautiful and stimulating as what Handsome and I enjoyed here at the farm. The pond was a cool gray and thickly stacked with fog. The pastures were not quite frosted, but pale and dewy. The house was as fresh as the outdoors, having been aired out all of yesterday and all through the very still, quiet night, windows open to the first breaths of autumn. Our animals greeted us with contentment and affection. I could stay here* all day. Every day.

   However you honor this day, I would like to ask for your attention to a few important needs. Prayer requests of all varieties. I know that God has authority and power over all these things and that His love is more than enough. And as Red Dirt Kelly said last night, so succinctly, “People + Prayer= Power.” We are urged to take our needs to Him. And it binds us together. And the act of doing it is comforting. And it yields miracles.
“And all things, whatsoever ye shall ask in prayer, believing, ye shall receive.” -Matthew 21:22

Please pray for healing for Sammye and Matt. And for all cancer patients and their hurting families.
Please pray for a swift, thrilling recovery from surgery for Judy.
Please pray for protection and peace of mind for everyone fighting the good fight, holding firm in their convictions and in love. 
Please pray for the health and vitality of family units everywhere, however unusual they seem from the outside. Pray for reconciliation between parents and children.
Please pray for addictions to be broken and conquered. 
Please pray for spiritual revival where it is needed most,which is in every human heart.
   This is a good day! God can cover all of your pain, all of your agony, all of your shortcomings with His powerful love and mercy. Let Him do it.
XOXOXOXO

* it bears mentioning that when I tried typing “here,” my device auto-corrected to “heal.” This farm has indeed become quite a place of healing.